Guest imported_El Mamerro Posted April 23, 2004 Share Posted April 23, 2004 Friend 1: "Yo, what do you tell your aunt when you catch her cheating on your uncle?" Friend 2, can't think of the punchline: "Um, I don't know, what do you say?" Friend 1: "You say, 'Yo, what the fuck are you doing?'" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ares Posted April 23, 2004 Share Posted April 23, 2004 "Yo, you know what would be awsome? Brownies before the weed show" "Dude, you realize you just said brownies before the weed show right?" "Ha, for real? Lets smoke another session." We were talking about the Rush concert. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fuck muni Posted April 24, 2004 Share Posted April 24, 2004 MY ITCH IS DICK i remember once me and my homies were trying to convince this drunk ass freshman to go piss on all these people chilling a few feet away..."yo nigga...you gotta piss so you might as well piss on some people..makes sense huh...ill give you 50 fucking dolllars" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cockfacedass Posted April 24, 2004 Share Posted April 24, 2004 i don't remember. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetcherry Posted April 24, 2004 Share Posted April 24, 2004 ive only been drunk ones...if i drink i drink proportionally so i dont get drunk... but the one time i was drunk it was in like 7th grade and my friends and i were trick or treating and i ended flashing random people and screaming "who wants to see some nittys(tittys)" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fuck muni Posted April 24, 2004 Share Posted April 24, 2004 Originally posted by cockfacedass i don't remember. tru that tho...i dont remember half of the shit i have laughed at while drunk...you guys got pretty good memories Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
azert Posted April 24, 2004 Share Posted April 24, 2004 Haha or they had other people around while they were drunk to remind them.. A couple weeks ago I was piss drunk with my friend and totally gone but apparantly I spent about $200 worth of time on my cell phone, and people have kindly reminded me about it time after time. All the details I can get are that I sang a lot and fell a lot. I do actually remember that one girl kept saying "You're drunk baby" and I would deny it every damn time. But that's about all I can remember. My friend started drinking before me so I do remember some things he said. "This is some fine Kentucky whiskey bourbon." (In a crazy ass voice.) "Lets drink to everytime we see a black person on BET." (We stopped after about 45 seconds.) "Holy shit! Two Japanese people are having sex on a Thigh Master on TV!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Dazzle Posted April 24, 2004 Share Posted April 24, 2004 "Dude, seriously, what the fuck is the point of a Pree Treserve?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_YEAHMANWORD Posted April 24, 2004 Share Posted April 24, 2004 we were all laughing at our drunk friend one night in a kitchen cause he was making these gross sandwiches for people that consisted of potato bread, mustard, chicken, and scrambled eggs. "Foley, what are you makin man?" The response: "BLT's" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
test pattern Posted April 24, 2004 Share Posted April 24, 2004 i went to my friends house and fixed his computer, installed all of the drivers he needed, etc. i kept calling myself the drunken tech support. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WeSt! Posted August 18, 2004 Share Posted August 18, 2004 Drunk as fuk playing strip poker with some girls & a mate i was dealing & passing royal flushs to my bro which ended up with the girl next 2 me taken off her top.She was kinda built for comfort & was askn why we werent looking at her...."coz ur titties look like lemons in a sock". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jakepaints Posted August 18, 2004 Share Posted August 18, 2004 hmmm ive done far too many "heyyyy you wanna make out with me? hahah just kidding........not really though im serious" when im drunk. seems to work well.... im sure ive said thousands of other things that i cant remember but were very epic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poop Man Bob Posted December 15, 2004 Share Posted December 15, 2004 Bump. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ledzep Posted December 15, 2004 Share Posted December 15, 2004 "I hate it when a girl has manly hands, it makes me feel like i'm shaking hands with my dad." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unholyhatredone Posted December 15, 2004 Share Posted December 15, 2004 G: hey E. how drunk are you? E: NEW JERSEY!!!??? WE'RE IN NEW YORK!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poop stache Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 i'm sorry! i didn't mean to piss in your face! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swindle Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 i cant really remember any quotes but i tried to pay a gas station attendent with a stolen road work sign. then i tried to barter for food with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swordfish meatloaf Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 MY EX WIFE TRIED TO WAKE ME UP TO DRIVE ME HOME MANY YEARS AGO. I PUNCHED HER IN THE MOUTH AND SAID "PUT YOUR DUKES UP CHUBBS" TRUE STORY Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SystemFailure Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 I can believe that. I remember asking a friend "Just drop me off here, you missed my stop, YOU MISSED IT!" While driving past a Hess. Only reason I remember this is I got ragged on for weeks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
B!G D Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 Me and two friends, Berto n AJ, were at a gas station. Berto said he'd buy us a candy bar. B: Whatchya'll want? Me: I want oreos AJ: I want some reses Me: Oh yeah thats what i ment AJ: You fuck drunk Me: Who's drunk? AJ: We are man, lets get some oreos Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lepthebeard Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 Me and my wife 2 weeks ago: W-what are you doing? What you can't open the bedroom door? M-Nothing W-WTF, you pissed on the floor! M-I didn't fucking piss on the floor W-Stand here....that is your piss you are standing in! M-It's not piss....what the fuck you think I'm stupid? W-(Takes my hand) There now your hands and feet are in your piss! M-Bitch you crazy W-I'm too tired to deal with you right now....go sleep on the couch! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 Passed out on the couch, I think the girls gone wild adds on late night TV influenced this one. GF: Hey, you should come sleep in bed. Me: Lets see those titties ladies! yea lets party. Oh yea you too girl take it all off! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FuckedReality Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 you can't E-magine me being a school teasher? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MedicineCabinet Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 my dumbass friends response when i asked him what he meant - "what do you mean, what do i mean?" i lold then called him a dumbass Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SwampFightOner Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 We were all drinking at my old apartment one night and two skunks were fighting in the yard. I thought it sounded like something else, and yelled at Manute and HATER. "BATS! CLOSE THE FUCKING WINDOW!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toiletseat Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 hello officer, where's the down low at Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShortFuse Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 We were playing a drinking game on a friends birthday and for what ever reason this one chick at the table kept being a smart ass. So I got the chance to beat her and make her drink so I was like "How bout that Sugar Puss!! drink up!" I guess it was funnier at the time but the name stuck and it was a continuing joke when she was around. I know I got more quotes...thats all I could think off at the moment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soul vice Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 We were all drinking at my old apartment one night and two skunks were fighting in the yard. I thought it sounded like something else, and yelled at Manute and HATER. "BATS! CLOSE THE FUCKING WINDOW!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SwampFightOner Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 I don't get the reference Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soul vice Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 i can't find the scene because youtube is a bitch but in "fear and loathing in las vegas" there is a scene where he hallucinates a shitload of bats edit- heres a part of it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kkvsi1OeUfc go watch the movie, damn good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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