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confessions of a pizza delivery man


kodak

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ok i deliver pizza and none of that happens. but if there's an asshole customer who is repeatedly an asshole, we WILL get revenge. take "mike" for instance.

 

mike is this football coach who lives pretty far away from the store, never tips and always bitches about everything. he always orders a pizza with all the meats and wnats it extra well done. and when we do this he always says there isn't enough meat and it's not cooked long enough.

 

so one day a driver named ben decides he wants a tip from mr. mike so he loads this pizza so it barely fits through the oven, it goes through once, my manager spits on it. and they put it throuhg again. the pizza is black and is heavy as shit. then mike actually calls the store back and says "this is the best pizza i've ever had."

 

then there was this other driver named isias that just got fired for stealing money. isias didn't take shit from anyone, if someone didn't tip him he would write their address down, then later that night when he was drunk he'd throw trash in their yard.

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