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15 mistakes guys make during sex.....


DETO

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what do you guys think of this a girl friend of mine sent to me.

15 MISTAKES GUYS MAKE DURING SEX

1) COMPLAINING

Guys like it when girls show off their nice ass. So, why do guys

complain when a girl is wearing tight pants? As long as they can get their

pants off, I really don't see a problem. You know you'r gonna get SOME, so

just chill out and savor each second.

 

 

 

2)WHEN GIRLS GO DOWN HALF-WAY

Guys try to force a girls head down when she's simply trying to tease the

guy. You know...get MR.HAPPY all the way up before she has to try and suck on

MR.LIMP

 

 

3)CHOCKING THE CHICKEN

Why do guys make girls do this 4 them? He can do this at home whenever

he's NOT getting any, not when he's about to get the real deal! Remember

guys.... it brings absolutely NO pleasure to us females and we do get bored

with jerking you guys off

 

 

 

4)HAIR PULLING

Yes, it's true that some females like a little bit of pain, but not when your

ripping the hair out of her head! Take it easy.

 

 

 

5)PANTING

During sex we females know that guys do get tired, and we can totally

understand this, but why do guys pant like dogs??? Not very attractive!

 

 

 

6)MINUTE MAN

Guys that cannot last for more than 10 minutes. This really disappoints

females. Girls need pleasure too! Otherwise, we'll just forget about sex and

stick w/ foreplay!

 

 

 

7)GUYS GOING DOWN

 

What's up with the guys eating the hole? Don't they know that the hole does

not bring pleasure and it's the clit. that does? There's really no point for

a guy to go down at all if he's gonna play around w/ the hole. That's like a

girl playing w/ your pubic hair(not a turn on)

 

 

 

8)FINGERING

Remember guys, that even though some females do finger themselves, they

have smaller fingers then you. Don't jam your fingers up there. Maybe you

could start off w/ one finger and then slip in another one when she gets

looser. And don't just move it in and out...you have to have rhythm...She'll

thank you ,you'll know by her constant breathing (panting) and her withering

body convulsing next to yours.

 

 

 

9)WHEN GIRLS TAKE THE RIDE

 

Don't complain that a girl is ridding to hard. In fact, don't say

anything. Just relax cuz she's doing you a favor and she's doing all the work!

 

 

 

10)CUM

 

Some girls are loud when they cum, I know this. But, some girls have to fake

all of the noises because 1) she's not feeling any pleasure and she doesn't

want the guy to think that he can't work it (which is actually true)

 

 

 

 

 

11) KEEPING FRESH

 

We all know that guys like sports, but do they have to come over after

they just got done playing a game and want sex, or even worse...oral sex? You

guys Better go freshin up before expecting anything!

 

 

 

12)ACNE

 

We all know that everyone has acne, but can't you guys try to prevent it

on your back? Girls are really turned off when a guy is on top and has to

worry about grabbing onto her man's back that is full of nasty pimples!

 

 

 

13)"TO SPIT OR TO SWALLOW?, THAT IS THE QUESTION"

 

Don't get mad if a girl does neither. I mean, a guy's sperm doesn't taste

good. In fact, it's repulsive. Forgive her if she finishes the job by hand.

;If she does spit, be happy enough w/ that.;If she swallows....YOU SHOULD

REALLY LOVE HER! That was really hard for her, I'm sure!

 

 

 

14)TALKIN $HIT

 

Girls don't like it when a guy tells all of his friends that he

got laid

last night& when you guys weremaking love & quot;(as you said

that night to the female)

 

 

 

15)BORING

 

Guys tend to do it the same way every time. Try experimenting w/

different positions every now and then. It couldn't hurt!

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Guest --zeSto--

and that list is pretty stupid...

Whoever wrote it really doesn't deserve to get any.

Bad humour isn't lways better than no humour.

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While I agree that jerking a guy off is about as interesting as patting a dog that just won't go away - that list is just piss-boring. Like all the stupid "men VS women" lists/toptens etc, its just a parade of cliched and hackneyed pseudo statements. snore

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Originally posted by DETO

 

9)WHEN GIRLS TAKE THE RIDE

 

Don't complain that a girl is ridding to hard. In fact, don't say

anything. Just relax cuz she's doing you a favor and she's doing all the work!

 

then stop bitching about us fucking too hard! and stop complaining! if you total up the sex life in a relationship, the male is doing 97% percent of the work...the other 3 percent consists of shitty rides and the occasional blowjob...and why can't girls suck our dicks if we go down on them like every other time we're together? and if you start something, finish it! don't suck our dicks for like 5 minutes, and then just stop...that's fucked up...you wouldn't like it if we did it to you!

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Re: Re: 15 mistakes guys make during sex.....

 

Originally posted by dai

 

if you total up the sex life in a relationship, the male is doing 97% percent of the work...the other 3 percent consists of shitty rides and the occasional blowjob...

 

 

maybe *someone* is just in a shit relationship, hmmmm?:rolleyes:

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any guy who makes those mistakes.....is a moron...especially if he falls under all of them...and the back acne thing is retarded...my back is clear..but if it wasn't...how the FUCK am i supposed to stop that?how is that a sex mistake?like OOPS ive got a problem i cant even reach...what a sex faux pas...i hope your friend is murdered by means of bludgeoning.1000 posts like what!

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Guest --zeSto--

this is the zesto school on fair oral sex...

 

the number of orgasms should be equal.. not the time involved.

Mostly because If I get 20 minutes of credit...

I could cash in segemnts and last all week long!

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Guest --zeSto--

^ I thought you didn't have a girl!

 

you shouldn't be telling all your drama in one thread,

then talking about sez with her in the next one.

 

The case gets more confusing.

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Guest blink_ATX

ahahahaha deto you got dissed on and id fuck you till you cry bei bei

 

and i aint even joking

 

you d be choking

 

l0rd Kaos

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heh, i doubt i can last ten minutes. i've only had sex once. as far as getting head, it kind of depends on how good she is. i've had it last like 20 minutes, and i've had it last like 2 mins (one of my ex's, that i still fool around with....i'm always embarassed because she does what she does better than anyone else i've ever had and i'm done in no time). i've had to fake orgasm with a girl before, which is kind of funny to me.

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Guest Canadiano

That is the biggest load of shit I've ever read. I can sure as hell tell you that either the girl who wrote that list has never been laid, or she is terrible in the sack. What a complete nerd. I bet she's mad ugly, too.

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Guest Ted Wakowski

Hahaha, what a retarded fucking list of rambling, uninformed shit. Sounds like it was written by a 15 year old.

It's so ... so ... so worth stripping the author naked and nailing her to a wall, piercing every part of her body, putting rings through the piercings, running a chain attached to the back of a truck through each ring and driving the fuck away with the pedal HELD DOWN.

 

You dumb bitch!!!!

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Guest platapie

18. never have sex with anyone who gets "mad hype" off manson.

basiclly if your name is blink atx you dont get any.

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Guest Dyptheria

it'e nice to know that none of that shit applieds to me. lets me know i'm good. well except the swollow thing. i've had so many encounters with girls that swollow, it only shows that all girls can swollow, some just have to be shown the light

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i can proudly say that i have none of those mistakes on my record except number 6. but i dont think any man can deny that their first time was under 5 minutes. i never asked a girl for a handjob either, they just do it themselves so they shouldnt be complaining about it. personally, id rather be jerkin myself off than have a girl do it. they dont know how to do it for shit! the only woman who made me cum from a hand job was one of the girls in a massage parlor i went to in bangkok. that was the only time. she knew what the fuck she was doing. she even surprised me. and i fully understand if a girl doesnt want to swallow or even get a load in her mouth. i hate it when any touches me. i think sperm is the nastiest shit. but if you really want a girl who knows how, and likes satisfying you, go to thailand. and if you cant satisfy a thai girl, youre just never going to satisfy anyone so you may as well get used to having a shitty rep.

 

 

 

peace

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