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d-town_bomber

MUSICIANS

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i can play mad shit

 

bongo drum

tambourine

xylophone

whistle

pots and pans

ukelele that i got for 4 dollars in HA

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Guest ilikeskulls.

i'm musical useless.

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Guest willy.wonka
Originally posted by ASER1NE

i can play mad shit

 

in HA

 

its HI as in the HI"gh"STATE..808

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quote:

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Originally posted by t-ball coach

On musicians

 

Is it me, or are all the people that play in symphonies absolutely hideous? I mean, I would not want to be awakened in the night by one, even if there is a fire. If there is a fire, find someone with a proportionate body to wake me up so I do not open my eyes and think I am in the movie Willow.

I have noticed a pattern in symphony-folk. Actually, I have noticed a few patterns in symphony-folk. First, there are the little people-the kind of people that probably utilize shoe horns on a daily basis. These are men and women of much smaller proportion (not dwarves or midgits) that are around the 4'6"-4'8" range, also referred to as the "I can do my own laundry, but can't reach the detergent" height. Second, in a non-formal symphony or group performance, I have been able to spot atleast two traditional indian garments among the players. It is at these times when i am forced to ask myself two questions: "Are these the trend setters among symphony-folk?" and "Where does one actually purchase pants with indian designs that have shoes of the same material attached to the cuffs?" It is mostly the women that wear these garments. The men seem to have an idea of how to dress.

The hairstyles of common symphony-folk differ greatly and I have seen some unique cuts. Women with Kenny G's haircut are prevalent and can be spotted from a mile away. And symphony women will have no part in letting scunci's go out of style. But it is the hairstyle that the men seem to clench on to like a retarded kid, scared of a racoon, gripping tightly to his mother that concerns me-the skull yamaka. This is a bald spot on the back of a man's head that takes the shape of a yamaka and in a dark symphony seems to trick me everytime.

The most puzzling thing about symphony-folk however, are their body measurents. I have never seen so many ill-proportioned people in the same room. Women with men's size shoes above fifteen are common as well as skinny bodies with a big thigh or a missing shin (also known as a neckle). There are also the pear-shaped folk that slide off their seats so easily and i always notice a disappointed look on their faces when they do so. For chairs were meant for people with flat backs.

I once even saw a woman with no neck to speak of. She played the flute beautifully.

If one ever attends a symphony and witnesses these things first hand, dont blert out things like "Look at that tuba player, she's shaped like a ham!" or "Man, the crotch on that lady must be hairy as shit!" Just sit back, laugh to yourself, or maybe tell the person next to you, because it is mean to make fun of symphony-folk.

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Guest Andy Capp
Is it me, or are all the people that play in symphonies absolutely hideous?

 

check out the principal cellist in the NAC orchestra. i've heard she's pretty sexy.

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