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Santa Claus

my farts are unbearable tonite

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dutch ovens are really only funny when there's people around to experience it. however i'm sleeping alone, and its just disgusting.

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i had some horrible shits today, i was fartin all through my interview. the funny part was, the lady that was interviewing me excused herself because she had been feeling sick. she had this guy finish.

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Originally posted by Zack Morris

along with a small case of the hershey squirts.

 

the worst :o

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your preaching to the preacher...its stunk so bad that I had my sister go in my bedroom and get my lighter and toss it in so I could light a candle. She said the smell was coming out form under the door. MUHAHAHA

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at least it wasnt one of those boom type squirt shits where all the shit just pours out at 200mph

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tjose are the worst because you have that giant bubble of air that makes it feel like you ripped your O ring then the waves from the liquid shit shooting out your ass....thinking about made me squirm a little

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and afterwards your asshole feels like its on fire

and you cant walk straight

and it pisses you off, then when you calm down

you have to go blast another one :spent:

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but when your riding in a car with someone and its the middle of winter and its 20 degree's out so they don't want to roll down the windows and you let loose one of those horrid vomit farts. Its like being stuck in the gas chamber.

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it doesnt get that cold here so ive never experienced that kind of horrible torture, but when its the middle of summer here at 101-plus degrees and you rip one before you get out of your car and then when you come back to your hot car with the windows rolled up an hour later and your fart has taken over, thats bad

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Originally posted by Zack Morris

oohhhh...I have to try that one because it gets that hot here....muhahahaha!!!!

 

at your own risk ;)

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your farts are never as bad to you as they are to other people. So you know if they smell so bad that they are making you sick. I can almost guarantee its giving everyone else cancer.

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Originally posted by Zack Morris

your farts are never as bad to you as they are to other people. So you know if they smell so bad that they are making you sick. I can almost guarantee its giving everyone else cancer.

 

yea if you can smell your own, thats bad

i think cancer is the least they can get

i give people the plauge

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brown lung..

 

My dad has the worst gas...he will be in the basement watching tv I will come into the house and I can smell it as soon as I step in the front door. They are horrible. I sometimes wish my ass was that powerful.

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hopefully I have inheritted the gift and I am yet to discover it...I just realized I ate masive amounts of broccoli and refried beans today...its going to be a good day today.

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brocolli will fuck shit up like no other!

especially when you go to a shitty chinese resaurant and get broccoli beef, woo watch out

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