aLBERThOFFMAN

Kid's got life figured out.

For the emotionless pessimist in all of us: Pretty good imo. Not long, easy read.

he simply said: "swag".

she gave him HIV

The gagging and puking at the end made it all worth while. Had to fight the urge to fap.

What a dumb, attention-seeking cunt. She's actually happy with the fame she got from this cringe-worthy ordeal..... https://twitter.com/ItsGiovannaP

This. Definitely do this.

It's on worldstarhiphop. I'd post the link but I'm at work and not about to go looking for it. Priceless shit though, I laughed heartily despite the genuine fuckedupness. Apparently she got hacked by 4chan and shit was sent to her parents and whatnot. How to ruin your life in 5 minutes.

smoking sess, acting mellow

to describe the culprit.

Got too drunk for a Sunday. Tomorrow is gonna suck..

all over a baby

. He got caught fapping

A retard trying to show off http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshh7Pdzz0QQgr7Qr10x and a troll http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhys5w51LdM8PONQ97

in a ditch somewhere

My situation is quite the opposite. The one female at my work's desk is right next to the washroom. Sometimes I wink at her when I walk out from taking my morning shit. I give no fucks if she catches a whiff, the face of a man with a decent ass. Not even down.

Pop a molly I'm sweatin' wooooh

Afghan gold seal hash.

I guess I can see where you're coming from, but my buddy has a rack in his garage so I lift there and don't really have to worry about some random dudes germs. But also getting used to wearing gloves could be detrimental, if one day you don't have them or forget them you'll essentially be screwed. Especially if you're lifting heavy, I've seen pictures of dudes having the skin ripped right off their hands. If grip is an issue use chalk.

They look pretty fucking stupid in my opinion. I wouldn't get them but I could see why they would be good for squats and deadlifts because you're not supposed to wear shoes with any sort of support to get the most drive. But then again you could always save your money and just wear your socks. That's what I do. Just wanted to say, if you wear gloves when you lift you're a pussy bitch. Be a man and get some callouses on your hands.

Hate it when i have pants with a sewn on button and that shit just pops right off. Hate it when I get frostbite on my fingertip from painting in the cold. Hate it when I leave my house, turn on my ipod and the battery is dead when i swear it was at least half full last time I used it. Hate it when I get paint or ink on any article of clothing, especially when it's new. Really hate it when the incompetent bitch at Tim Horton's fucks up my coffee, like its not fucking complicated to take a coffee order. Even worse when I realize it after I've left and too far to go back and bitch them out.

beads in their ass

Update: So I messaged that chick yesterday just to say what up. She proceeds to tell me that she's preggo and that she's keeping the kid (she's 21 and her parents are die hard Catholics and whatnot). Needless to say my heart dropped and I gone done nearly shat myself. On the verge of a panic attack I inquired whether or not it was mine or if i had anything to worry about. I was wearing a dome but LifeStyles suck and I've had them break on me in the past without even realizing. She says it's not. Says she knows whose it is but the guy won't own up to it, and that this next guy she's seeing at the moment is perfectly okay with the situation and is willing to roll with raising some bastard kid. Lulz. May we all now share a genuine chuckle for this chick's misfortunes and my unwarranted shitting of bricks. Wear a rubber kids.

'cause bitches won't smash

But the $2 menu is too good to pass up. Fuck you Wendy's, just take all my money. ..your balls. A slip up could be devastating.