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smashed tangerine

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Everything posted by smashed tangerine

  1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxdVYgRPE1g&list=UUfKFPIi5hcdiviMBJV1KzSA
  2. http://www.theguardian.com/music/musicblog/2014/mar/18/odd-collaborations-continued-susan-boyle-and-mike-patton Ha ha. I want this to happen.
  3. Yeah, the character in Infamous Second Son is a stencilist. There are marked areas where you can paint some not-quite rap letters by holding the control pad vertically, with R2 as the nozzle (I never knew spray cans had nozzles on the side), then using it in the same manner as a Wii remote. There aren't that many main missions, definitely not compared to the first game. Story's kind of crap, rushed and of course short. Gameplay-wise it's very good, I think. Overall, I'd say it's worth getting, but I'd recommend it if you've never played the first Infamous; it's a new character, location etc. so there are no references/spoilers to the previous two games.
  4. DTTN to piss around the urine cake and whisper 'sorry' if he was too careless. DTTN to change the channel to Ellen DeGeneres when his chick has gone out.
  5. free image hosting Hello. Professor DAOkins here. As you may know, I'm a well-known aphillyist who's written many best-selling books based on the science of 'sik K's' and aphillystic philosophy, such titles include: The Dogwhale Delusion; The Red Text-maker; The Greatest 'K' on Earth. A man once asked me ''what if you're wrong?'' about my views relating to fashion. I put it to him: if you were born in San Francisco in the 1970s, you'd be wearing pink tight Levis from the age of 20. If you were born in Shoreditch, London in the 1980s, you'd be wearing beige River Island skinny fit chinos in the present day. What if I'm wrong? What if you're wrong about the suitability of wearing tight pants? Some people believe in the Dogwhale even though there's no evidence to prove it. It's no different to believing in The Flying JNCO Monster or the Orbiting Cheesesteak.
  6. ''To make a very poetic and profound quote, you must include a piece of tautologous dribble or include dribble of a tautologous piece'' - A scientist-philosopher-politician-inventor from the 18th century. ''I'ma young azz nigga, countin' big stack figures. if a trunk-ass bitch wanna get wed, then I'ma put ring round muh finga and pop dat bitch dead. NIGGA!'' - some washed-up 90s rapper or an ignorant trap artist nobody remembers/give two turds about.
  7. Anal Cunt - You're a Fucking Cunt. No, I'm doing it wrong. Anal Ghostbusters - You're a Fucking Cuckoo. Improved!
  8. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCNu2IHWPQw
  9. DTTN to have a Sex and the City box set under his TV and not claim his chick left it there then show you its receipt. DTTN to let off a fart and walk away in long strides, turning his head left and right, then contorting his face with a pompous look of disgust and blaming it on a dog. DTTN to go to Starbucks and lay out a silk towel on a chair for his laptop, and then give it a affectionate double-pat with the tips of his fingers and hum a satisfied giggle to himself. DTTN to open an Xmas present labelled to himself, reveal that it's a framed black and white photo of himself staring confidently with his lips pursed, with the message 'You are my one true gift. I'm always watching you : ) xxxxxxxx' written diagonally in purple metallic ink across the glass cover.
  10. I was seeing a 40-year-old Polish chick when I was 25. I learnt that 'Catholic' is a code word for bareback. The end.
  11. The urge is too much to take All I can think about is playin with myself It's time to masturbate Well I've got my Hustler and I don't need nothin' else.
  12. This is kind of similar: http://www.youtube.com/user/REXRevX He's that Rev X/Spirit of Truth preacher (check the 'Spirit of Truth' videos on the related column if you're not familiar with him). The funniest one he done involved running up to the camera wearing a pair of boxers and kung-fu-style slippers, suddenly stopping while holding a plastic knife, then he growls ''THIZZIZ A STICK-UP! NOW BREAK YO' MOTHAFUCKIN' SELF.'' :lol:
  13. Every now and again a thread appears with shit like this: ''what it do, nurglars. So yeah, maaayn, I wuz at this party and this bitch looked at me and she gasped with pleasure when I blinked at her. She kinda look like Adryanar Leema mixed with one uh them Kardashun broads. Anyways, so I approached the motherfuckin' skank-ass bitch and started chewing my tooth pick on the right side of my mouth and quickly adjusted my New Era's vizor n shit and that bitch gobbled tha cock sevrul times in some dickhead's bedroom and then we'z fuckd ehrday after that to some Plies album mixed by DJ SheiksPier, (and I even banged her moms, but that's another story, eh-heh-heh). but then she came over wit her cute-ass friend with a cute ass who sat next to me when my hoe went for some groceries. we had a meaninfulls condversation about quantum physics and the Baroque period n shit, so she smiled at me and asked if I wontid to go watch a movie wit her tomorrow. Argh, fuck. Help me, Oontz... I've been audacious throughout my entire life, but now I've fallen flat on my face since having to make such a simple decision. I don't know what to dooooooo.'' Basically, you've had sex and you want all the bros to know. U mad? Yes, slightly.
  14. The video where the hula hoop gif came from (7:42) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RjonQobBmdI
  15. ''Oh-weee. You'sa a fine-ass hoe. I'ma have to take you to a club. HERNK HERNK HERNK HERNK'' ''Hi, I'm Bam Margera. And welcome to crackass'' ''Ugh... help me! I'm bleeding like a stuck pig.''
  16. I know nobody asked, but... here's the video:
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