I got 5 months sober on monday. Life is all right, I got the normal problems that everyone has and they still fucking suck to deal with but this time I'm not getting high or drunk over them, which makes them infinitely easier to deal with. I'm working the steps, I'm doing some small service work, no service positions or anything but rides, support and fellowship. I was doing 6-7 meetings a week but have cut it back to 4-5. I started making some amends but haven't really pushed that shit. It's weird dealing with myself, thoughts and emotions, in a sober state. I'm finding out that I don't have much of a reference for dealing with situations and emotions. I've been in some sort of addiction for the past 15 years and it's definitely stunted my emotional response to stress. All I've known is suppress and get high, so I'm basically having to relearn how to react and respond to myself and others. It's fucked up because you end up feeling and realizing that you seriously have to relearn how to live and problem solve. It's a long process and as I'm really learning, it's all one day at a time. Still not done with court but I've come to turns with the possibilities of what might ensue and I'll get through it all, sober. It's kind of funny how 5 months can totally change your whole perspective on what is an appropriate and healthy way to live your life.
Don, my brother, give me a call if you need to. I know you can do whatever you need to stay healthy, it's hard living that life out there but you're a strong dude and if this what you want you'll figure out a way to make it work for you. stay up.