I feel unbelievably depressed even doing this, and I'm not entirely sure why I am pouring out my problems to an internet message board. I guess sometimes you just gotta talk to people disconnected from the situation, who knows..
Basicly I have just had the shittest week of my life. Yes, cry me a river.
First of all I find out that my ex (of a month after 2 years) started seeing one of my good mates (I've been friends with him for 10 years) behind my back 2 weeks after we broke up. Now these two I never liked hanging around when we were going out because there seemed to be something going on, either way.. And it was one of the reasons that we broke up in the end. Either way, so they're seeing each other behind my back and lying to my face about it every single day. Only way I found out was because I suspected it and looked at his phone, messages like "oh i love you so much i had such a good time last night" yadda yadda in his sent items. I kick off, try to make it nice to him by talking.. Ok cool.. Talk to my ex, found out he lied to me again about not sleeping with her when I tried making things nice.. Beat him up. Then things get worse.
After that a 4-5 hour long argument on the phone continued with my ex, the highlight of which was that I found out 2 of my close mates new about it and not only did nothing but didnt told me and also that when I'd been pouring my heart out to her when I had 2 parties last weekend just as she was leaving she went and spent the night around his afterwards, still knowing how I felt and what she said etc. This was the point in which I went mad, smashed my door and punched through a 6x6" stupidly thick glass window.. My first went through, but because the glass was so thick it cracked, let my fist through then tore it up pretty bad as it came out. I then spent 2 hours in an operating theatre and 4 days in hospital. To my ex's credit she did come visit me every day for 3-4 hours.
With nothing to do but think about all above.
Oh, also both of them instantly said "We wont see each other honestly well stop, we wont even talk" as soon as I kicked off.. True love for you.
Either way, now I'm out of hospital with god knows how many stitches in my hand (I cut my tendon, damaged my artery etc.) and loads of my so called mates seem to be under the impression im the bad guy in this situation. Got told that I could only go to a huge party next weekend if I agree not to touch him etc..
I mean, is it just me or shouldn't my mates be a bit fucked off that one of their friends stabbed in the back so dam hard? He knew full well I still liked her a stupid amount, his lying about it proves that.
Now me and my ex are trying to make up, be friends etc (why I want to be beats me, Im still obsessed with her) and her mum wont let us see each other etc. because apparently im 'dangerous'. Yet both of us want to meet up, talk things over properly and just get on and be friends if thats all we can be.
Right, had to get that off my chest to someone.. Or thousands as I probably have done. Yes, for all you fags that are going to insult me for this - I am aware of the pathetic situation I am in.