I forgot to link this article yesterday while I was writing my post.
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/busy-new-stupid-ed-baldwin-sphr-gphr/
The CTO of my last job sent that out to the company and after reading it I realized how many people throughout my day were spinning their wheels, not getting a lot done, and making it seem like they're really getting a ton of work done. It's a good read even though I don't like or participate in linkedin.
So the next time you find yourself apologetically telling someone that you would liked to have met them, responded to them, or just acknowledged their existence but couldn't because you've been so busy, consider the REAL message(s) you're sending them:
My time is more important than yours.
I'm not very good at prioritizing my time.
I want you to judge me based on how busy I am, not how productive I am.
You aren't a priority, or at least what you want to speak with me about isn't a priority.
I spoke to a colleague (thanks Greg Roche) about this very issue and how we might avoid glorifying our busyness and the importance we place on it. The world is in perpetual do-more-with-less mode and that means it's easy for all of us to fall into the trap of becoming busy. Just speak to someone a generation or two older than you to confirm that the world moves much faster than it used to, and that the pace of change continues to increase with each passing day, month and year. Well, my colleague offered me a simple suggestion on how to curb my personal glorification of busy when interacting with family, friends and colleagues.
Instead of using "I've been busy" as an excuse for your lack of responsiveness, instead simply say "it's not a priority for me".
Because that's what you're really saying.
Doing so will definitely set the cat amidst the pigeons and cause you to reflect heavily on whether you should have prioritized differently! To opt instead for the mainstream response of apologizing and saying your busy is just plain weak, and probably constitutes a little white lie. Because you could have chosen not to invest the last two hours catching up on email or sitting in worthless meetings. Because you could have chosen not to watch the last episode of Game of Thrones, or not taken that walk to play Pokemon Go and capture two more fictitious characters. You get the picture.
I've started to adopt this practice and it's highlighted for me the importance of prioritizing my time, and not using the excuse that I've been too busy. Telling someone straight up that they aren't a priority is a lot harder. Saying "it isn't a priority" also doesn't glorify your busyness and imply that your time is more valuable than theirs.
Try it out and see if it drives different behavior from you - it certainly has for me.