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Your Life: A Compilation


Guest imported_Tesseract

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Guest imported_Tesseract

In no particular order and for the last weeks. 2 days ago i went to this girls house, we watched a movie and laughed a little, after 4 whiskeys we got in this crazy exhausting mutual future talk. She wanted me to leave but digged the fact i wanted to stay, we ended up on the sidewalk as she was trying to slam the door in my face and i pretended i had terrible pains in the stomach so i could buy some more time..it all ended in laughs and tears and when i was finally locked out i realised i still had a glass of scotch on my hand...i walked a long walk with it downtown, finished it up and went home.

 

With the same company, on the car this time i've heard the black keys 'i'll be your man' at least 57 times in a row, after that, i broke the middle mirror while trying to illustrate my feelings...since then i glued that fucker 5 times only to have it land in my face at random driving moments.

 

I've been helping some architect friends with their scale models of their project...i'm the official spraypainter. I'd never thought i'd be looked upon for my can control and spraytech knowledge...montana white matte is the fuckin shit.

 

I rode a bike at 3am all the way home but i already told you about that...

 

i woke up at 8 the other day..had plans to go to my school and finish some stuff i have to. Got bored in the train..went all the way back downtown..it was 9. i was the first customer on the cd megastore..i bought a motorhead album..the ace of spades..went back home and blasted that shit over breakfast

 

Last night i was out drinking on my own, hitting bar after bar..lots of walking too...lots of talking on the phone with her..i think only last night granted me a brain tumer just from the cell phone overkill..was proud enough to see some old tags of mine on a street while i was in deep philoshophical crap we say to girls to prove nothing in particular..

 

 

Breaking up is fuckin hard, i'm telling you that..after so many years you dont even know who you are anymore. What you like, what you want...still the teenage kick you get is priceless. I've never felt so depressed and happy at the same time...i'll go buy a dvd burner now,

goodmorning 12oz, and remember..each time you interact with nature and no company you are reminded just how unimportant you really are.

 

[latin quote]khgkgkgfkhf[/latin quote]

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hahaha....nice......nothing much has happened that fun in my life......all I want to do is take someone's head and ram it into a concrete wall.....sounds inspiring doesn't it?.....probably not.

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i forgot to contribute

 

lately my life has taught me that anytime you desire something your not going to get it. The more you want the more disspaointed your going to be when it doesn't happen so I have decided to check out some books on buddahism to try learn of different philosophies and methods of ridding your life of all desires.

 

Its getting to be that time of year where I start get depressed and I am not looking forward to it. I am thinking about getting back on my meds though I don't really want to because that means i have to quit drinking and doing other things that I won't mention on this board plus I will have the attention span of a 5 year old on speed. Maybe if I do that though this winter won't suck ass.

 

Though recently I made a trip to nashville which I don't really remember too much of. I remember several 40's of OE a deucer of arrogant bastard and a pint of vodka were consumed. Somehow I found myself in some bars bathroom with a guy that had been fallowing my crew around all night and we really didn't like the guy so I think I was planning on scaring the shit out of him so I ripped a paper towel dispenser off the wall and threw it through a bars mirror and tried to punch a hole through the stall and ended up bruising the shit out of my hand. I also remember a friend and me knocking over a statue of jack daniels in another bar because the bartender wouldn't serve us. After knocking over this tennessee icon we scream "MAKERS MARK BITCH!!!" letting them know that good ole kentucky makes me best whiskey. Thats about all I remember of the night. From what I was told we hit six different bars that night and I only remember two.

 

that night was pretty dumb and pointless but I thaught it was funny considering that its something I don't normally do. I need to go to nashville again.

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Guest imported_Europe

Nice one Tess.

I spent the last few days thinking about the future aswell.

Education, jobs, living, girls, relationships, money, meaning of life, all that.

Did so much text-messaging that my right thumb is growing dangerously big...

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Originally posted by Zack Morris@Oct 23 2004, 03:16 AM

I also remember a friend and me knocking over a statue of jack daniels in another bar because the bartender wouldn't serve us. After knocking over this tennessee icon we scream "MAKERS MARK BITCH!!!" letting them know that good ole kentucky makes me best whiskey.

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I've found, like Zack Morris, that anytime it seems like i'm about to do something huge and positive and crazy in my life, it falls through. Big holidays, moving out, cars, girls, they've all fallen through.

 

Not much else interesting has happened lately to bother compiling. I've decided that in order for my life to start moving forward, i have to move away. As soon as i clear my debt with the courts, i plan on packing up and moving interstate and throwing myself in the deep end. Hopefully good things will follow.

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Guest im not witty

just ended a five year relationship that was coming up on six with the quickness.

 

i like the being free to do whatever i want whenever i want part. because i forgot what that felt like. but i HATE the, have to hang out with wretched whores that piss me off with every word they speak in order to socialize with women part.

 

i need to meet some better girls. i keep meeting them in droves and each one is worse than the next.

 

ps. im getting a gigantic tattoo today. t minus 3 hours.

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having your some bitch not anwser your phone calls and stand u up.

having your bst frined ditch your night of bombin for a girl he dident get shit from.

eating breakfast at 3:20 in the day.

cant smoke weed (really a problem right now)

need to go to court but they wont get my papers processed.

water program

a nasty caugh.

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my head hurts...jager is evil...but oh so good

 

 

well my life in the last 4 years has been full of surprises i could have avoided if i had takin the hints that lead up to the events that put me at my current disposition..

 

some highlights?

 

 

2001..

 

set fire to this 12 year old kids hair while he was playing marvel vs capcom...pure accident...that why we must stop the evil that is the jerri curl...hmm that gives me an idea..

 

started babysitting my little sister instead of paying rent to my moms....found out the whole side on my moms family is genetically wierd me and sister included..

 

pillpoppin, wall rockin, sticker happy,man with the supplies.

 

flop house ,white girls with mustaches...beer...they still make fun of me....beer

 

no money,city of industry ca,5 bucks an hour..unloading truck 10-15 hour days...but still only got 60 a day...i felt like a number

 

long beach harbor strikes...lost my shit job....forklift ucf makin money...

 

2001..

 

went into the arcade buisiness......victoria..meth..poolstick..stain is still there

 

 

2003...

greyhound...wisconsin..robotripping..everything looks the same..out of batteries..need music

 

beer bratwurst labor ready manpower temp worker

 

more beer gas station worker

rum crafts store worker

fuck second shift making transmissions for ford

 

2004

 

forklift carrying molten metal hits me...

 

money

 

roomate

 

women........

 

2001...she says she pregnant...baby comes of cambodian and mexican...damn

2002...turns out the girl likes icp and is a hoe.......swore off white women forever

2003...hahah yall saw the thread i made about that..

2004...she left me for another black dude..she said "HIS LOOKS LIKE A TUBE OF COOKIE DOUGH...AND MIIINES A SMALL PENCIL WIIITH BROOOOOOKEN LEEEEAAAD!!."

PRESENT..roomate with problems..but we hump every other week...good?

 

taking a long vacation in town for a few months

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My life as it is now,lets see.

 

I am head over heels for a chick that i really dont think i will have anything with. She makes me feel comfortable and she is below me in terms of social ladder and also just overall. but i lower myself to her level just to make myself feel normal, because normal people dont date highly expressive people, or people that are involved with the crazyness of life how some people on this board are.

 

my job is stressing, i am quite tired, i find myself sitting on my sofa more and more often playing my guitar when i used to be out and about meeting people and just enjoying life.

 

i respect women way too much, i hold them on a pedestal but honestly some chicks just dont deserve it, i give i give i give and they dont give back,

 

i ruined a great relationship i had, the girl was incredible, she was going places beautiful and i ruined it, so where do i go from there, i kick myself in the ass every other day for that, i tend to loose desire for a certain goal of a woman and just find an easy lay for the night. it fucking sucks because then i feel retched.

 

i think im depressed but i put a mask on,

 

i usualy paint to just escape it all but i havent painted in almost 2 weeks, i feel shitty right now,

 

overall thouge life is okay.

 

I slept with a fat chick also, i feel very disgusting for that. :burn:

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o and on top of seeing my ex grilfriend almost everyday which make me feel like i got kicked in the stomach, i just had to tell my older brother that his girlfriend of three years had a threesome with two bikers and continued a one week affair with one of them. during the same week our grandmother died and she left the wake early to bang siad dude out. fucking cunt. fun.

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-got a huge, scary promotion with a ton of money

-im getting a cellphone now which is fucking funny...luckly its not because im an obnoxious peice of shit who wants to text message all his buddies about the new limp biscuit collaboration from taco bell...no....im just that goddamn important now

-obviously i bought some new dress shirts

-went to manhattan where i had my own driver, a dumb sexy new suit and many, many good meals...didnt get laid though which bummed me out because ive heard thats not a hard thing to do in new york

-paid off all my past due bills left over from my old place

-got my couch peed on by a boston terrier

-had post breakup sex with a girl for what is probably the 6th or 7th time....i really have to put an end to this

 

and

 

-i predict in one hour i will be going out with my lucious italian lady friend for drinks which will be followed by another night of going home bummed out because im not with said girl....

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That was deep Tesser... damn. I know what you mean.

 

I don't even understand what's going on in my life.

Not too long ago I was weak and defeated. Now shit is so hectic and I'm getting so wound up I feel like I'm going to explode. I don't even know where this energy is coming from, since I feel like no desire for anything. Not long ago I coulda been going to Iraq, and I thought if I was lucky I could get killed. Now because I've been so depressed, I'm getting kicked out the military. Hmm... what the shyte... Now I don't know wtf. I'm going to miss the regimen. There are alot of things I won't miss. But I don't know what I'm going to do civilian side. At least in the military you know three things, when you get up in the morning, when you eat, and when you get paid.

Despite the fact that I have no motivation, I have to take meds to sleep, and it's hard for me to just be. My nerves are so bad that I've had tension shakes all the time. It's been interfering with my art alot so I've just been kinda working it into it. No long smooth straight lines for me.

I've been getting little pieces of happiness here and there though. I've been hanging out with my brother alot. And I've been helping him out alot. I've got my therapy. I've been talking with my g/f's mom quite a bit. A couple friends here and there. Talking with a girl but have no idea what's going on with that. Lately I've been getting my jollies from debating. I've taken on the army and won. I guess that's something to feel good about.

 

For all my people in the struggle.

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*father has split of jamaica with a russian broad not a whole lot older than me

*mom has been to the funny farm twice now

*I'm about to turn 23, and i feel so old

*the depths of my depression over these things allow me to truly appreciate two amazing things in my life:

 

A)my fantastic relationship with my girlfriend, now in its sixth year. everyday its better than the last. i don't know why i got so lucky

 

B) playing music with a friend. i can't describe the rush i get out of the fact that we play really well together, and are able to improv for hours, and be tight on every change. it a religious experience

 

 

 

thats all. oh and my kidneys are shot again

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-Living for the weekend

-only JUST getting by doing the bare minimum in school (this could prove not to be a good idea in 2 weeks after exam time)

-Not paying for much (without stealing)

-Dating women more than 10 years older than me. (having them buy me stuff)

-being too cool for everything

-Writing on a bunch of things

 

I really need to grow the fuck up..

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