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What went wrong with hot girls?

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by ElectricitySucks, Dec 24, 2005.

  1. ElectricitySucks

    ElectricitySucks Veteran Member

    Joined: Jul 13, 2001 Messages: 6,395 Likes Received: 24
    (Personal Disclaimer: This is all in good fun and a joke, as I am friends with the people I make fun of. Sometimes. I rarely have problems with this subject mainly due to the fact that I mentally avoid these types of situations for some unknown reason. If you are offended, then that really sucks and you should find someone to feel bad for you.)

    LETS GET SOMETHING IN 2005 STRAIGHT. Girls. Yes. Girls. What happened to girls? Does anyone know? Does anyone in the state of New York know just what the fuck it is that happened to girls? Is it the water they are drinking? Is it the money they are stealing from their parents? OH WAIT. OPPS. I forgot to narrow the title of "girls" down. Let me start off again, but not with as much bullshit.

    3..2..1..HOT girls. Thats more like it. Hot and Girl= Hot Girl= appealing. Appealing? NOT AS APPEALING AS HOT GIRLS WERE IN 2003. (and half of 2004.) Its all your personality. Not the way you look. You've pretty much always looked good until the whole artificial tanning thing came along. Ok. Now for my purpose of this rant of boredom...

    Dear hot girls:

    Hi. What the fuck happened to your species in 2005? Did God poision your food? Did MTV and every magazine really take out your brain that bad? 98 percent of you need to realize your problem. Its sort of like an AA class...the first step to it is coming to the reality in which your problem lies. And your problem is that...

    You suck.

    Big-time. So much that I got so incredibly fucking bored that at 2:33 a.m. on December 24th, 2005, I started to write about you. Yes! You now have a personal fanclub! NOT. Let us first drive through your life in my (and many others) brains.
    First off, your stupid, and I am absolutely nowhere near jealous of your dinosaur-brain boyfriends. That take steroids. That drive expensiveley fast cars. That take COMPLETE advantage of you. That do whatever it is that MTV tells them to do. That have a sonic the fucking hedgehog hair-cuts. That go to clubs. Most of the time, It costs $15 or more to get into these clubs. All so that your retarded boyfriend can get a look on other girls. (And since your retarded in the first place, you go to get with other guys too!) Theres nothing wrong with that, however. Anyway. How much is it for a drink, $6? Hmmm. Well I don't consider myself cheap but I am able to put that money towards something more exciting then a $6 drink. For twice that amount plus a carton of orange juice, you and I can go wherever the fuck we want, with whoever the fuck we want, without paying to get into whereever the fuck we go. And we can have a whole lot more fucking fun. If thats not more fun, then your idea of fun is simply fucked to shit and you are completely brainwashed to death thanks to your guidoic friends.
    I especially like how you hot girls call yourselves "crazy." Next time I hear you or see you type the word "crazy," I'm going to have Chuck Norris punch you straight in the baby-maker. That word is OVER-RATED. If I could ask every girl that calls themselves crazy, 90percent of them would tell me some bullshit story about how they lost their cellphone at some doofy club and proceeded to make out with 14 guys and later found out that 14 of the 14 guys you made out with had 14 different kinds of herpes. I'm sorry, but 160.7 percent of the girls that call themselves crazy just AREN'T crazy. If you want an example of a the words "girl" and "crazy," ask me in person. You might/will be suprised.
    So that about half sums it up. I just lost complete interest in what I was wtiting about. I just wasted 20 minutes or whatever typing this up and now I don't really care. I don't even feel like writing a conclusion. My next topic is going to be about why girls are awesome. Dead serious. Oh the irony.

    Until next time.

    *edited for sp.
  2. Dr. Dazzle

    Dr. Dazzle Veteran Member

    Joined: Nov 19, 2001 Messages: 8,147 Likes Received: 3
    You are so drunk...
  3. dead sentiment

    dead sentiment Member

    Joined: Nov 29, 2004 Messages: 422 Likes Received: 0
    ummmm the thing is, that guys tend to go for the chick that is advertising her goods the most.. that is what most guys consider a "hot girl." and those girls are usually douche-bags.

    you sleep on the girls who dont advertise everything, and then get jaded by the douche-bag whores who cheat on you or treat you like shit.
  4. ElectricitySucks

    ElectricitySucks Veteran Member

    Joined: Jul 13, 2001 Messages: 6,395 Likes Received: 24

    i havetner drennk ine a aweek duyde.

  5. logik.one

    logik.one New Jack

    Joined: Dec 24, 2005 Messages: 67 Likes Received: 0
    yeah man i agree... i swear to god i work with this girl and you described her perfectly... her hair is all fucking spike, she turns herself into anthing thats on mtv... and she is constantly going to some dumb club and getting hammered. hot girls have just gone stupid or something i swear to god, this girl did too much coke and died for like 5 minutes or something. normally this would be a "eye opener" right? WRONG! 2 days later she is back at the club! only this time she gets slipped some roofies by some frat guy and now she cant remember what happened. its like paris hilton and tera reid ar like the mother fucking pied piper for girls nowadays.
  6. ElectricitySucks

    ElectricitySucks Veteran Member

    Joined: Jul 13, 2001 Messages: 6,395 Likes Received: 24

    wait, girls get blow-outs now too?
  7. logik.one

    logik.one New Jack

    Joined: Dec 24, 2005 Messages: 67 Likes Received: 0
    if thats what you want to call it... she definatley has a sonic thing going.
  8. fuck muni

    fuck muni Senior Member

    Joined: Nov 26, 2003 Messages: 1,089 Likes Received: 4
    i like to spit on girls with that retarded ass sonic the hedgehog haircut.....stupid bitches
  9. CACashRefund

    CACashRefund 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Oct 8, 2004 Messages: 14,171 Likes Received: 272
    gotta bump it for the chuck norris inference
  10. duh-rye-won

    duh-rye-won Member

    Joined: Aug 8, 2001 Messages: 580 Likes Received: 2
    electricity, man.

    are girls really changing?

    no offense dude, but it sounds like you just need a good blowjob.

    wait. this ig going into the homosexual uber-tones thread isn't it.


    i'm wasted merry xma.s
  11. dumy

    dumy Veteran Member

    Joined: Oct 8, 2004 Messages: 5,056 Likes Received: 0

    haha..spetacular word usage there [/golf clap]
  12. Dirty_habiT

    Dirty_habiT Administrator

    Joined: Mar 8, 2001 Messages: 18,132 Likes Received: 79

    It's not gh2y unless the balls touch.
  13. Dirty_habiT

    Dirty_habiT Administrator

    Joined: Mar 8, 2001 Messages: 18,132 Likes Received: 79
    He also said, "That drive expesiveley fast cars."
  14. AerosolTerrorist

    AerosolTerrorist Member

    Joined: Oct 8, 2004 Messages: 443 Likes Received: 0
  15. ElectricitySucks

    ElectricitySucks Veteran Member

    Joined: Jul 13, 2001 Messages: 6,395 Likes Received: 24
    i was making reference to the dudes who have blow-outs...but yeah those scene girls like doing that spikey in the back and straight in the front....i dont really care what girl's hair looks like, its not going to make or break getting with them.