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What is a torta?

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by me IS cool, Feb 13, 2002.

  1. me IS cool

    me IS cool Guest

    Here's the jist of the anatomy of a torta fer all ya wankers...(haha that was a joke)
    1. The bread.
    2. mayonaise
    3. beans
    4. the beef
    5. lettuce (not the lts crew, the vegetable..haha)
    6. cheese (optional)
    7. sour cream(optional)
    8. avocados(optional)
    9. oinions (optional)
    10. tomato (tomato, tomatoe...blah.)

    Anyways you start off with the meat which you would use carne asada(which is grilled beef..available at your local chunte market. Prefferably make it in a frying pan.
    Next get a bolillo (bo-lee-yo) which is a piece of baked bread that looks like a mutant. Cut bread horizontally along middle so that you have two pieces(see picture below. Add a bit of butter to it. then you drop that sucka onto the grill and let it chill for bit.
    After the bread looks good and ready add mayonaise to the bastard.
    After that get yourself some beans, refried are the best. Heat 'em up and add over mayonaise.
    Once you got that far get yer meat and drop it onto the beans (you may cut up into smaller bits, for easier consumption).
    Next get all your vegetables in line and chop them up. Chop up the lettuce, tomato, avocados, and onions. Don't forget to grate the cheese.
    After you've done all that add the cheese on top of the meat, the heat will melt the cheese over the meat.
    Next add the lettuce over the cheese.
    Tomato follows the lettuce.
    Now you may add onions and then sour cream to the bitchin combo.
    Finally take the avocado and drop that nigga on top to finish it off.
    Place torta on plate and enjoy.
    For best taste comsume with a beer.

    And that my students is how you make a torta... your life may once again resume it's normality.

    Here's a picture f the finished product:

  2. -Rage-

    -Rage- 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Apr 12, 2001 Messages: 10,006 Likes Received: 28
    BOOGIE HANDS??????!!!!!!!!
  3. Ms.Bombastic

    Ms.Bombastic Member

    Joined: Jan 10, 2002 Messages: 346 Likes Received: 0
    you are just infatuated with these 'tortas'
  4. me IS cool

    me IS cool Guest

    yes. is there something wrong with me? :p
  5. shameless self promotion

    shameless self promotion 12oz Legend

    Joined: Mar 7, 2001 Messages: 16,307 Likes Received: 112
  6. KASTsystem

    KASTsystem Member

    Joined: Jul 3, 2001 Messages: 832 Likes Received: 0
    there was this little restaurant down the street from my apartment that made really good tortas, but they closed down. The new place that opened up makes HORRIBLE tortas with no hot sauce, jalapenos on the side, the bread is not fried, and there is no avocado. And I live in a Mexican neighborhood. I'm never going to that store again.
  7. T.T Boy

    T.T Boy Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: May 18, 2001 Messages: 21,803 Likes Received: 41
    those avacados look fucking dope.
  8. blood as ink

    blood as ink Guest

    that looks really fucking good...and i agree with tt boy those avocado's look good.:yum:
  9. juggernaut

    juggernaut Member

    Joined: Nov 12, 2001 Messages: 414 Likes Received: 0
    mayonaise?! you soo craaaaazy..

    i like the "fat chola" choice. :D
  10. cee-lok

    cee-lok New Jack

    Joined: Jan 18, 2002 Messages: 64 Likes Received: 0
    torta (a mexican hamburger)
  11. L.RonHubbard

    L.RonHubbard Guest

    boogie hands is in the lead
  12. Kr430n5_666

    Kr430n5_666 Banned

    Joined: Oct 6, 2004 Messages: 19,229 Likes Received: 30
    "makros doesnt like me so i cry all day and eat torta sandwhiches. i am so depressed."
  13. seven.13

    seven.13 Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Oct 5, 2000 Messages: 3,572 Likes Received: 19
    A torta is a cake.
  14. Kr430n5_666

    Kr430n5_666 Banned

    Joined: Oct 6, 2004 Messages: 19,229 Likes Received: 30
    not in "scary goth zone".
  15. seppuku

    seppuku Member

    Joined: May 11, 2000 Messages: 718 Likes Received: 0
    a tort is a type of cake.