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Vegetarians: The MEAT Tree

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by WebsterUno, May 21, 2003.

  1. WebsterUno

    WebsterUno Guest


    Tree That Give Meat Instead Of Fruit!
    Friday May 16, 2003

    MANCHESTER, England -- Here's some good news that vegetarians can really sink their teeth into: Researchers have developed genetically engineered fruit trees that bear real meat!

    Fruit from the new Meat Trees, developed by British scientists using gene-splicing technology, closely resembles ordinary grapefruit. But when you peel the large fruit open, inside is fresh beef.

    "Our trees may sound like something out of a science fiction movie, but it's really a simple, down-to-earth idea whose time has come," declares Dr. Vincent Tartley, director of agricultural bioengineering research for the UltraModAgri Group, which created the amazing trees.

    "Vegetarians have been complaining for years that despite their moral convictions against consuming meat, they still crave the flavor of a good steak once in a while. Now they can have their cake and eat it too."

    Although it's taken 12 years to develop the trees, the concept is simple.

    "We take the genes from cattle that produce key proteins and splice them into the reproductive cells of grapefruit trees," he says. "When the seeds mature into trees, instead of producing ordinary citrus fruit, the pulp contains meat. You get the flavor, texture -- even the smell."

    Those who've sampled the meat agree it tastes like the real thing.

    "I was a bit skeptical at first when I sank my teeth into a hamburger after they told me it grew on a tree," says Londoner Mark Basker, 41, who participated in a consumer taste-test. "But it was juicy and delicious -- nothing leafy about it at all."

    Meat grown on trees needs only sun, water and fertilizer and thus is more cost-effective than raising livestock, Dr. Tartley also points out.

    Meat Tree products could be on the market in Great Britain by year's end and, pending USDA approval, on dinner plates in the U.S. by 2005.

    Some fanatical vegetarians insist they could never eat meat -- even if it grew on a tree and no animals had to be killed. Others love the idea.

    "My mouth is watering already," says a committed vegetarian of 20 years.

    But religious leaders are uneasy about "trans-species genetic engineering." "Mixing animal and vegetable DNA to create a new species is playing God," argues Rev. Lawrence Bedlow, Britain's leading expert in medical ethics.

    Here is the actual link to the article:
  2. Poop Man Bob

    Poop Man Bob Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Nov 16, 2000 Messages: 10,259 Likes Received: 18
    As much faith as I have in Weekly World News ... for some reason, I just can't trust 'em on this one.
  3. jbrshmonster

    jbrshmonster Elite Member

    Joined: Jul 11, 2002 Messages: 3,902 Likes Received: 294
  4. BROWNer

    BROWNer Guest

    this is a joke right?
    that's fucking disgusting.
  5. WebsterUno

    WebsterUno Guest

    I dont know, thats what I was wondering.
    If it isnt, sheeit, bring on the bbq sauce!
    Im fuckin hungry.
  6. Pinup

    Pinup Senior Member

    Joined: Mar 13, 2003 Messages: 2,208 Likes Received: 0
    Boogie hands on this...........I'm sceptical.........
  7. $360

    $360 Elite Member

    Joined: Oct 2, 2002 Messages: 2,600 Likes Received: 1
    damn...its scary to think that someday cattle will be obsolete...not that the article is the most beliveable.
  8. !@#$%

    [email protected]#$% Moderator Crew

    Joined: Oct 1, 2002 Messages: 18,517 Likes Received: 622
    i don't trust an article with improper grammar...IN THE TITLE!

    "Tree That Give Meat Instead Of Fruit!"
  9. metallix

    metallix Elite Member

    Joined: Oct 7, 2001 Messages: 2,955 Likes Received: 1
    great just like that.
  10. Wilt TA

    Wilt TA New Jack

    Joined: Jul 27, 2001 Messages: 0 Likes Received: 0
    anyone willing to do the cross reference research?
    this is really interesting..a good read..thanks
  11. Daddy Screw

    Daddy Screw Member

    Joined: Jun 15, 2002 Messages: 551 Likes Received: 29
    meat on trees.....

    :lol: :lol: :lol:
  12. iloveboxcars

    iloveboxcars 12oz Royalty

    Joined: Jul 29, 2002 Messages: 20,506 Likes Received: 448
  13. WebsterUno

    WebsterUno Guest


    I wish they would make the money tree already!
  14. Comp

    Comp Senior Member

    Joined: Mar 22, 2001 Messages: 2,134 Likes Received: 0
    i had vegan food today, it was actually good.
  15. miles apart

    miles apart Member

    Joined: Apr 14, 2003 Messages: 407 Likes Received: 0
    this is the coolest god damn thing since SARS.