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this is why i thoroughly enjoy the simpsons....


LadyKrink

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im really bored so i got all this stuff from different Simpsons websites.

i'll start with bart who is probably my favorite character...

 

bart

 

http://freephoto-i.net/users/2025/13537'>

http://freephoto-i.net/users/2025/13538'>

Chalkboard Gags

 

 

Season 1

I will not waste chalk

I will not skateboard in the halls

I will not burp in class

I will not instaigate revolution

I will not draw naked ladies in class

I did not see Elvis

I will not call my teacher "hot cakes"

Garlic gum is not funny

They are laughing at me, not with me

I will not yell "fire!" in a crowded classroom

 

Season 2

I will not encourage others to fly

Tar is not a plaything

I will not Xerox my butt

I will not trade pants with others

I am not a 32-year-old woman

I will not do that thing with my tongue

I will not drive the principal's car

I will not pledge allegiance to Bart

I will not sell school property

I will not cut corners I will not get very far with this attitude

I will not make flatulent noises in class

I will not belch the National Anthem

I will not sell land in Florida

I will not hide behind the 5th Amendment

I will not do anything bad ever again

I will not show off

I will not sleep through my education

 

Season 3

7F24 - I am not a dentist

8F01 - Spitwads are not free speech

7F23 - Nobody likes sunburn slappers

8F03 - High explosives and school don't mix

8F04 - I will not squeak chalk

8F05 - I will finish what I sta

8F06 - "Bart Bucks" are not legal tender

8F08 - Underwear should be worn on the inside

8F09 - The Christmas pageant does not stink

8F10 - I will not torment the emotionally frail

8F11 - I will not carve gods

8F14 - I will not spank others

8F13 - I will not aim for the head

8F15 - I will not barf unless I'm sick

8F17 - I saw nothing unusual in the teacher's lounge

8F19 - I will not conduct my own fire drills

8F20 - Funny noises are not funny

8F21 - I will not spin the turtle

8F22 - I will not snap bras

8F23 - I will not fake seizures

 

Season 4

8F24 - This punishment is not boring and pointless

8F18 - My name is not Dr. Death

9F01 - I will not defame New Orleans

9F03 - I will not bury the new kid

9F05 - I will not teach others to fly

9F06 - I will not bring sheep to class

9F07 - A burp is not an answer

9F08 - Teacher is not a leper

9F09 - Coffee is not a drink for kids

9F10 - I will not eat things for money

9F11 - I will not yell "she's dead" during roll call

9F12 - The principal's toupee is not a frisbee

9F13 - I will not call the principal "spud head"

9F14 - Goldfish don't bounce

9F15 - Mud is not one of the 4 food groups

9F17 - No one is interested in my underpants

9F16 - I will not sell miracle cures

9F18 - I will return the seeing eye dog

9F19 - I will not charge admission to the bathroom

 

Season 5

9F21 - I will never win an Emmy

9F22 - The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy

1F07 - All work and no play makes Bart a dull boy

1F08 - I will not say Springfield just to get applause

1F09 - I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers

1F11 - My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man

1F10 - I will not go near the kindergarten turtle

1F14 - I am not delightfully saucy

1F15 - Organ transplants are best left to the professionals

1F16 - The pledge of allegiance does not end with "Hail Satan!"

1F18 - I will not celebrate meaningless milestones

1F19 - There are plenty of businesses like show business

1F21 - I will not retransmit without the express written permission of Major League Baseball

1F20 - 5 days is too long to wait for a gun

 

Season 6

1F22 - Beans are neither fruit nor musical

2F33 - I will not use abbrev.

2F01 - I am not the reincarnation of Sammy Davis Jr.

2F04 - I will not send lard through the mail

2F05 - I will not dissect things unless instructed

2F06 - I will not whittle hall passes out of soap

2F08 - Ralph won't morph if you squeeze him hard enough

2F09 - Adding "just kidding" doesn't make it okay to insult the principal

2F10 - Bagman is not a legitimate career choice

2F11 - Cursive writing does not mean what I think it does

2F12 - Next time it could be me on the scaffolding

2F13 - I will not hang donuts on my person

2F14 - I will remember to take my medication

2F15 - I will not strut around like I own the place

2F18 - The good humor man can only be pushed so far

2F19 - I do not have power of attorney over first graders

2F32 - Nerve gas is not a toy

2F21 - I will not mock Mrs. Dumbface

2F22 - The First Amendment does not cover burping

2F16 - This is not a clue … or is it?

 

Season 7

2F20 - I will not complain about the solution when I hear it

2F17 - "Bewitched" does not promote Satanism

3F02 - I am not a lean mean spitting machine

3F01 - No one wants to hear from my armpits

3F03 - The boys room is not a waterpark

3F05 - Indian burns are not our cultural heritage

3F08 - Wedgies are unhealthy for children and other living things

3F07 - I will stop talking about the twelve-inch pianist

3F10 - I am not certified to remove asbestos

 

Season 8

3F23 - I did not learn everything I need to know in kindergarten

3G01 - The truth is not out there

4F08 - I am not licensed to do anything

3G03 - I will not hide the teacher's prozac

4F16 - A fire drill does not demand a fire

 

Season 9

3G02 - I no longer want my MTV

5F01 - Everyone is tired of that Richard Gere story

5F03 - I did not invent Irish dancing

5F05 - I will not tease Fatty

5F06 - There was no Roman God named "Fartacus"

5F07 - Rudolph's red-nose was not alcohol-related

5F23 - Shooting paintballs is not an art form

5F10 - Pain is not the cleanser

5F12 - Silly string is not a nasal spray

5F13 - I was not told to do this

3G04 - My butt does not deserve its own web site

5F14 - I will not demand what I'm worth

5F17 - I am not the new Dalai Lama

5F18 - I was not the inspiration for "Kramer"

 

Season 10

5F21 - I will not file frivolous lawsuits

5F19 - Butt.Butt is not my E-mail address

AABF02 - No one cares what my definition of "is" is

AABF03 - I will not scream for ice cream

AABF04 - I am not a licensed hairstylist

AABF05 - "The president did it" is not an excuse

AABF06 - My mom is not dating Jerry Seinfeld

AABF07 - Sherri does not "got back"

AABF08 - I will not do the dirty bird

AABF09 - No one wants to hear about my sciatica

AABF11 - Hillbillies are people too

AABF10 - Grammar is not a time of waste

AABF12 - I do not have diplomatic immunity

AABF13 - It does not suck to be you

AABF14 - I cannot absolve sins

AABF15 - A trained ape could not teach gym

AABF16 - Loose teeth don't need my help

AABF17 - I have neither been there nor done that

AABF18 - No one wants to hear from my armpits

AABF20 - I'm so very tired

 

Season 11

AABF23 - Fridays are not "pants optional"

AABF22 - Pork is not a verb

AABF21 - I am not the last Don

AABF19 - I did not win the Nobel Fart Prize

BABF02 - I won't not use no double negatives

BABF03 - Indian burns are not our cultural heritage

BABF05 - I can't see dead people

BABF07 - I will not sell my kidney on eBay

BABF04 - I will not create art from dung

BABF06 - I will stop phoning it in

BABF08 - Class clown is not a paid position

BABF09 - Substitute teachers are not scabs

BABF10 - My suspension was not "mutual"

BABF11 - A belch is not an oral report

BABF12 - Dodgeball stops at the gum door

BABF13 - "Non-flammable" is not a challenge

BABF14 - I was not touched "there" by an angel

BABF16 - I am not here on a fartball scholarshop

BABF15 - I will not dance on anyone's grave

BABF18 - I cannot hire a subsitute student

BABF19 - I will not obey the voices in my head

 

Season 12

BABF20 - I will not plant subliminAL messaGOREs

BABF17 - I will not surprise the incontinent

CABF01 - I am not the acting President

CABF04 - I was not the sixth Beatle

CABF02 - I will only provide a urine sample when asked

CABF03 - The nurse is not dealing

CABF06 - Science class should not end in tragedy

BABF22 - Network TV is not dead

CABF05 - I will not "let the dogs out"

CABF08 - I will not hide the teacher's medication

CABF07 - I will not publish the Principal's credit report

CABF10 - The hamster did not have "a full life"

CABF12 - I will not buy a Presidential pardon

CABF09 - "Temptation Island" was not a sleazy piece of crap

CABF11 - I will not scare the Vice President

CABF13 - I will not flush evidence

CABF14 - Fire is not the cleanser

CABF15 - Genetics is not an excuse

CABF16 - Today is not Mothra's day

CABF17 - I should not be twenty-one by now

 

http://freephoto-i.net/users/2022/13458'>

 

http://freephoto-i.net/users/2022/13456'>

 

 

homer

http://freephoto-i.net/users/2022/13446'>

 

http://freephoto-i.net/users/2022/13451'>

 

Homer’s List of Things to Do Before Dying

 

 

1. Make a list [crossed out]

2. Eat a hearty breakfast

3. Make videotape for Maggie

4. Have man-to-man with Bart

5. Listen to Lisa play her sax

6. Make funeral arrangement

7. Make peace with Dad

8. Beer with the boys at the bar

9. Tell off the boss

10. Go hang gliding *

11. Plant a tree *

12. A final dinner with my beloved family *

13. Be intamit [misspelled] with Marge

 

* #10, 11, and 12 Homer is unable to squeeze into his expected last few hours

 

http://freephoto-i.net/users/2022/13454'>

http://freephoto-i.net/users/2022/13453'>

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good....id hate to think you sat there and typed it all out...

 

 

 

id have to joke on you if you did.

 

 

 

 

 

 

the simpsons are dope though.

i still love the camping episode where the rv goes flying off the cliff..

and homer and bart have to set traps to catch rabbits and send one flying across the forest. thud.

 

"ok, ill go into the bush and flush him out, and YOU grab him....got it?"

 

"right dad."

 

he he he..

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Originally posted by ragsoe505

simpsons are dope, anybody remember the tracy ullman show?

 

 

-the shocker is old

 

Damn! Old skool, that's where the simpsons first started. The looked weird back then too.

I never really saw the tracy ullman show much, maybe a few reruns.

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Guest uncle-boy
Originally posted by -MOE LESTER-

this is why i thoroughly enjoy kristy

 

1. saw her clit

2. booty shorts

 

 

no tits yet though?? waiting??

 

:lol:

 

oh no you di'int!

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