Tyler Durden Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 yes. from time to time 99% of us will watch porn. and the 1% is usually lying....but thats not what this is about. porn teaches. its a learning tool. a gift if you will. some things i have learned from watching porn are: 1)girls like it when you cum all over their face. actually. wait. no. they love it and will always ask for it. even if they dont say it...just rest assured....they'll be thankful when you do it. 2)girls like to change posistions every few seconds and rarely like anything remotely convetional. ever. 3)porn stars are acrobats. capable of amazing contortionist feats. they are indeed gifted and should rival sports stars and teachers in their big fat salaries. chances are, your girl (or guy...) will want to try some of this amazing contortionist shit themselves. dont ask. always assume. thats another thing porn has taught me. 4)dont ask. always assume. 5)girls LOVE taking it in the ass. always. every single girl loves this. ESPECIALLY if you have a monstorous cock. in fact, girls love taking it in almost any hole you can imagine. chances are they wont admit to it though. theyre shy. awwwwwww. 6)every single girl on the face of the earth can deepthroat. any girl who says they cant or wont is cheating you. they love taking 10 inches of man meat down their throats and into their bowels. if your girl refuses to deepthroat. i suggest bricking her in the back of the head. but not while your dick is in her mouth. that would just hurt. 7)girls love fucking midgets. they just love it. make sure your girl steers clear of these tiny fucks because theyll probably end up giving them head. the midget would be standing on some phone books of course and your girl will still be tryin to get down extra low.....but you know how it is brah. cowabunga. im sure theres more i've learned, but i forget right now and i'm trying to watch porn... so yeah, what have you learned from porn? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyler Durden Posted October 22, 2002 Author Share Posted October 22, 2002 no. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest duh-rye-won Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 first my penis is small Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest --zeSto-- Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 the only REAL lesson from porn... Sometimes you've got to just give'r, or you'll be missing out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest duh-rye-won Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 Re: first Originally posted by duh-rye-won my penis is small i mean 2nd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fr8oholic Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 THERE'S ALWAYS SOME BUMP AND GRIND AFTER THE BLOW JOB/MUFF DIVE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Dazzle Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 Fucking on couches, tables, and kitchen counters is remarkably easy and comfortable...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kettiecat Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 everything i know i've learned from porn..... MAYBE THATS WHY I'M AN ATTENTION WHORE play on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest --zeSto-- Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 ^ who's the girl in the dress? It sure as hell aint rollergirl! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest angry xbox Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 Originally posted by Dr. Dazzle Fucking on couches, tables, and kitchen counters is remarkably easy and comfortable...... ahahhahahaahahhaahaahhh only thing i learned from porn is that a condom doesnt hurt if youre a slut whore who fucks for a living... yes i have tested this theory on the local stripper whore inmy hood have you??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest imported_Europe Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 Being from Denmark, the FIRST country in the world to legalise porn, I must say it has had a very pleasant influence on young womens attitude towards sex... Maybe thats why there is no danish word for uptight... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest sneak Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 ^haha, europe has his priorities sorted! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harry Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 i learned that women like to keep their high heels on ,and most of them are slutty lesbians too ...just like real life Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest --zeSto-- Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 here a bad thing I learned from porn... Even the men are hairless, unless they're european. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rip Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 Originally posted by harry i learned that women like to keep their high heels on ,and most of them are slutty lesbians too ...just like real life that is so true. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest socrates Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 cheesy music is played whenever you have sex.....where ever too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest YinzerXpress Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 Originally posted by socrates cheesy music is played whenever you have sex.....where ever too always, my background music i prefer is the a-team theme nahimean Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest socrates Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 bow-chika-bow-wow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest --zeSto-- Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 if you're getting some, and decide to invide a friend over for some of the action, the girl will think it's a great idea and invite some of her friends into the group too! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AeRoSoL JuNkiE Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 I've learned that if you walk into almost any store with a ghetto blaster playing a porno soundtrack in the background, a suit on, and you say things like "mmmm i wanna have yo baby, lets make some" that girls will pretty much automatically boink you in the back room. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rip Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 Originally posted by socrates bow-chika-bow-wow 70's pr0n music. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest --zeSto-- Posted October 22, 2002 Share Posted October 22, 2002 and you cant forget that if a girl says 'No' she really means "Just pull my hair and smack my ass and I'll be good to go." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyler Durden Posted October 22, 2002 Author Share Posted October 22, 2002 Originally posted by harry i learned that women like to keep their high heels on ,and most of them are slutty lesbians too ...just like real life DAMMIT how could i forget that? yeah, WHENEVER a girl calls you over and her friends there......get ready for some hot 3 some action. always. and they LOVE wearing the heels that are real big and see through glass.........uncomfortable? fuck no. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fr8oholic Posted October 23, 2002 Share Posted October 23, 2002 Originally posted by Europe Being from Denmark, the FIRST country in the world to legalise porn, I must say it has had a very pleasant influence on young womens attitude towards sex... Maybe thats why there is no danish word for uptight... don't rub it in doodd!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weapon X Posted October 23, 2002 Share Posted October 23, 2002 pearl necklaces are a lot cheaper than one would think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yoink Posted October 23, 2002 Share Posted October 23, 2002 :lol: :lol: i dont know why i havent looked in this thread before this, but it definetely is a crowd pleaser. yeah its all about the wang.. oh and how could everybody forget...foreign girls that you come across will always be drop dead georgeous know one sentence of english(sp) and willing to bone at the drop of a dime;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welcome mat Posted October 23, 2002 Share Posted October 23, 2002 dont spooge in a girl's eye. they dont like that. the funniest porn I saw was this girl who took a shot in the mouth, then spit in in this other girl's face and punched her in the mouth while she was getting fucked I cracked up in the middle of it, it ruined the mood. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyler Durden Posted October 23, 2002 Author Share Posted October 23, 2002 Originally posted by welcome mat the funniest porn I saw was this girl who took a shot in the mouth, then spit in in this other girl's face and punched her in the mouth while she was getting fucked I cracked up in the middle of it, it ruined the mood. what kind of mood were you trying to set exactly??? i cracked up just reading about it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dignan Posted October 23, 2002 Share Posted October 23, 2002 .....and don't let is scare you when they moan like it's really hurting, they're actually loving it........and all those sounds are always real, never fake *pure pleasure baby* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
el barto Posted October 23, 2002 Share Posted October 23, 2002 the gurl will do anythign as to not look bad in front of the camera. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.