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things you didnt know about sex

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by dik.n.ur.ear, Oct 11, 2001.

  1. dik.n.ur.ear

    dik.n.ur.ear Senior Member

    Joined: Jan 5, 2001 Messages: 1,556 Likes Received: 0
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    THE LONG AND THE SHORT:
    According to the Kinsey Institute, the biggest erect penis on record measures 13 inches. The smallest tops off at 1 3/4 inches.
    HOTDOG HELPERS:
    The Caramoja tribe of northern Uganda tie a weight on the end of their penises to elongate them--sometimes to such a degree that the men literally have to knot them up--while the Mambas of New Hebrides wrap theirs in yards and yards of cloth, making them look up to 17 inches long.

    DOUBLE TROUBLE
    In 1609, a doctor named Wecker found a corpse in Bologna with two penises. Since then, there have been eighty documented cases of men similarly endowed.

    SO LONG THE NIGHT: Among the Mangaians of Polynesia, 18-year-old couples make love an average of three times a night, every night, until their thirties, when the weekly average drops to a mere 14. That's it?! FAST LANE:
    The maximum speed at which erotic sensations travel from skin to brain has been clocked at 156 miles per hour.

    COITUS SEMI-INTERRUPTUS:
    A honeymooning couple are suing Holiday Inn for ten thousand dollars, claiming their sex life is now dysfunctional because an employee mistakenly walked in on them on their wedding night.

    LES LIAISONS DANGEREUSES:
    At least 500 Americans die each year from asphyxia in an attempt to lessen oxygen flow to the brain in order to induce a more powerful orgasm.

    NOBLESSE OBLIGE:
    England's King Edward VII, a man of considerable heft, had a special table built so that he could comfortably engage in sexual intercourse.

    It was considered elegant for aristocratic ladies of the sixteenth century to let their pubic hair grow as long as possible so it could be pomaded and adorned with bows and ribbon.

    In fourteenth-century Europe, high-ranking noblemen were permitted to display their genitals below a short tunic, while those not impressively endowed could, if they chose, wear a leather falsie called a briquette.

    MISSIONARIES TAKE NOTE:
    Given today's average frequency of sexual intercourse, it would take the typical American couple more than four years to try every one of the 529 positions described in the Kama Sutra.

    GALLIC WAY OF DEATH:
    French President Francois Faure expired in a bordello in 1899 during the act of copulation, which so terrified his lady of the evening that her vagina constricted intractably, necessitating the surgical removal of the dead man's member.

    JUST SAY HOWDY:
    When men of the Walibri tribe of central Australia greet each other, they shake penises instead of hands.

    BONBON MOTS:
    "There may be some things that are better than sex, and there may be some things that are worse. But there is nothing exactly like it." --W.C. Fields
     
  2. dik.n.ur.ear

    dik.n.ur.ear Senior Member

    Joined: Jan 5, 2001 Messages: 1,556 Likes Received: 0
    whoever knows where i stole this from should be ashamed of themselves
     
  3. shyster

    shyster Member

    Joined: Mar 6, 2001 Messages: 752 Likes Received: 0
    "soothes away aches and pains"
     
  4. Vanity

    Vanity Veteran Member

    Joined: Apr 11, 2000 Messages: 7,673 Likes Received: 6
    i used to think the clit was near the chode.
     
  5. tow up from tha flow up !

    tow up from tha flow up ! Member

    Joined: May 31, 2001 Messages: 878 Likes Received: 1
    When I was younger I knew about sex, but I never knew about penitration. I thought sex was just sticking a rocket in the cock socket and letting it sit there for a few minutes then pull it out and the girl would be pregnant. I thought being 'fingered' was the same thing, a guy would just stick his finger up your girlie place, leave it there for a couple minutes, then pull it out and you'd be done. I thought a blow job was actually where a girl blew cold air onto a dick. This was when i was like 10, but still, I just didn't understand.
     
  6. sectorTVA

    sectorTVA Senior Member

    Joined: Jul 8, 2000 Messages: 1,272 Likes Received: 1
    my campus has a kinsey library...just a ton of books on everything regarding sex...i have yet to check it out.
     
  7. CATS

    CATS Senior Member

    Joined: May 30, 2001 Messages: 1,600 Likes Received: 0
    Ill be happier knowing these things...:p
     


  8. Wait, it's not any of these? Shit. This explains a LOT. Beer,

    El Mamerro
     
  9. mines even smaller
    even when im rock hard
    i should submit a pic to them...
    if anyine so desired, my girl would testify
     
  10. taper

    taper Elite Member

    Joined: Nov 29, 2000 Messages: 4,509 Likes Received: 0
    nise info. i'm now ready to have mad love making sessions sice i heve incresed the penis weight to 25 pounds.:king: :mexican:
     
  11. Fox Mulder

    Fox Mulder 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Nov 23, 2000 Messages: 12,434 Likes Received: 85
    some of those things sound like urban legends. like the french president francois faure.
     
  12. George Dubyah Bush

    George Dubyah Bush Senior Member

    Joined: Mar 26, 2001 Messages: 2,286 Likes Received: 0
    hahahaha

    hahaha, funny shit:crazy:

    umm, the Fact were the 16th century ladies grew their pubic hair really really long and pomaded it????
    GRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSS.
    Thank god shaving pubes is the in thing to do! Imagine all that greasy pomade (i'm assuming its the same as the hair product i use sometimes),...all that greasyness within a jungle of Crotch hair!!???!!

    YUCK:spent:

    p.s. these simlies are fun
     
  13. Funk~This

    Funk~This Guest

    My pal who is hated by everyone once told me when he was little he used to think sex was when the guy got hard and stuck his dick between her clit and her panites and moved it back and forth haha!
     

  14. Okay, seriously... this isn't it either? C'mon, that's DEFINITELY sex. Right? Beer,

    El Mamerro
     
  15. suburbian bum

    suburbian bum 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Jan 30, 2001 Messages: 14,673 Likes Received: 3
    HAHA bump this shit up.

    I wonder if your penis was too big, and you got a boner, you would faint cause you would have a shortage of blood to your brain.
     
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