there hasnt been a girl trouble post in awhile.....(LONG)

soooooo. heres the deal.

im 17, in 12th grade.

in 10th grade i met this reaallllly cool chick, and decided to persue her. i guess my "tactic" was to just be her best friend, and hope things develop from there. i let that happen, and we ended up being good friends. but, it started turning into counseling sessions, where i'd hang out w/ her just so she could let out her troubles and such, and well, that just started to suck. i liked helping her, but the relationship seemed so one sided. so i stopped talking to her. i got into this new chick who led me on and didnt really like me blah blah, and that started at the begging of 11th grade. fast forward to april 2001. the first girl, she starts talking to my friends saying how she misses me and how she had a major crush on me back in 10th grade and all this crazy shit that i couldnt believe(shes reaalllly fucking hot, im reeallllly fucking fugly) so anyway, i was just...surprised. so we talk, and decide to get together and all that jazz. we pretty much decided we wanted to get married in the future, and that we share something REALLY special...and we still feel the same way. except...well, fastforward to last tuesday.

it was like....3 days after our 1/2 year anniversary, and i was the happiest i'd been in awhile w/ her. (we'd fight every so often, and had taken breaks but we'd always get back together after a few days.)

so she comes over on tuesday and is kinda acting weird. she writes something down on a piece of paper and is sayin "this will be ok, right, this will be ok." and im just like....."ok....?" (were both kinda weirdo's so i didnt think anything of how she was acting). so i read the paper, and it says: "i have a date. i still love you."

and im just feelin numb. and i tell her that we need to stop going out then. her date is with this piece of shit Rusty, whos 26, shes 17, almost 18, whos been pursuing her for awhile. the next couple days i just felt numb. didnt know what to think. so we get together on thursday, and.....i manage to feel ok about it. it still sucks a lot...but i'm just like, its ok. we still love eachother. we still can have a future together. thats fine till.....monday, yesterday. she told me in the day to call her that night, so i do so. i cant get a hold of her til about 10:45. im like....ok, cool? it turns out she had gone to Rusty's house to watch TV, and left her ringer off on accident. i get pissed....and we talk about it. we didnt really get anything resolved, just me being upset and her justifying her actions. she comes over tonite, and we talk, and its going ok, until Rusty calls her cell telling her to hurry up to his house. and im just fuck this. i get pissed and just kinda make her leave. after she was gone for about 15 minutes, i call her cell, and tell her that homecoming is off.(we'd been planning to go for awhile....) i say i'm sorry, and she doesnt believe me so i just hang up on her.

thats the scenario.

thanks if youve stuck around this long.....

anyway, my dillema, is that she still insists that she loves me, and she doesnt know what to do. she says she has all these people pulling her in different directions, and shes just trying to act on her feelings. and so, i feel stuck, in that, this girl i love, isnt acting like she loves me. im really good at letting myself get used, and i just dont know if i should cut her out of my life like i did after 10th grade, or if i should try to maintain this akward friendship. i realize that she doesnt really treat me right at all....and, im beggining to question what loving someone actually means. im rambling, but whatever. i just...i dont know what im asking anymore, i just dont want to let her go, because i know her love for me is real, but....shes hurting me. should i just let her grow up, and stay out of her life forawhile? fuck this. im getting confused.

thanks for....reading this and any comments ya'll can throw at me.

fuck me,

racecar.

ps...to the few that know me here, THATS whats been going on w/ chelsea and i, in case you were curious.

Holy shit man... this sucks. I feel for you. But it seems to me like she's just out there playing the field because she knows that whatever happens you'll always be there to fall back on... you are setting yourself up to have your heart broken and your life fucked up for a while if you let this continue... of course this is just my opinion but I am in a similar situation where my girl of 1 1/2 years has suddenly decided to go overseas for a year to stay with her ex's.... :( :mad:

Tell this chick where it's at man, you don't sound like a sucker and you shouldn't get played like one.. get on with your shit and meet a new girl.. sounds easy ? well it is !

Good luck man..

out.

Well, I think sometimes, girls don't want to be the "bad guy," so they will play mind games to the point of you breaking it off. Maybe she doesn't want to hurt you, so she will break it up the only way she can, by making you do it. She will probably want something like for you to still be cool with her, but that rarely works either. Let her do what she wants...I would say to just tell her, "Do what you want, just don't hurt me while you are doing it." And explain to her what is hurting you...if she doesn't understand, wash her teeth down her throat with blood.:D

You're being fucked.I feel sorry for you, i am not able to define love but even if i could "self respect" would still be a more important issue for you at the moment.Let her go...it seems that she wants to.

Sorry man,i really dont know shit about you and your relation with your girl,but it seems she's playing with you and wanting her shouldnt be equal to getting all fucked over

you guys are smart......thanks.

keep 'em coming....

usually at times like this i would write something filled with thinly veiled sarcasm.

this is not the case here.

dude, i feel bad for you, my problems with girls just never end, either we dont like each other at the same time, or im too lazy to do anything about it. i think avils has a point, sounds like your her fallback, however if you really do care about her then you know its not as simple as just saying "fuck you dont talk to me anymore" (even though ive done so on several occasions which means a)no feelings there to begin with b)im colder than i thought), i think that since there is no easy way out, you should just confront her and (as hard as it may be) say "look, its either me or him" and tell her that you care about her and that you feel that you two have something together that is stronger than whatever this scumbag rusty is up to. if she chooses him then it wasnt meant to be and youll have to move on. if she chooses you then you can have a party.

for now, im prescribing "saves the day" to you, listen to alot of that, and maybe some boysetsfire (across five years, the fine art of falling) take a bunch of that and post something in the morning. just dont start wearing emo glasses, that shit has a tendancy to be addictive and shouldnt be abused.

okay, hope this shit works out man.

nsk

smart words sozer.

the thing is, she KNOWS that this isnt right. she knows that i love her and she loves me, its just like....she REALLY needs to grow up or something. and...yea, i agree w/ a lot of what yr sayin dude, thanks.

ps...i already have emo glasses.....

i would basically tell you the same sozer did. tell her what she means o you and that your hoping that she realizes what she has and tell her its either me or him. Its better to do it now and get all this out of the way then be strung along and feeling like shit about it longer than you have to *if* things go wrong.

I had this same basic situation happen to me and she chose the other guy. now that I look back it was a good thing that she did because I didn't need all that fucking drama. Plus I beat the living shit out of the guy and that made me feel alot better. Plus the girl realized what she threw away and still wants me and I am like "fuck you"..it makes me happy...If things don't work in your favor in the begining who knows you may get the sweet revenge that I got.

sorry about the rambling I have been sipin alot of rum and coke.

as far as recomended music goes..saves the day and some boyestsfire, but dashboard confessional is good for ya too. Hank Williams is the kind of broken hearts. Get some of his stuff that is just him and as few instruments as possible..his stuff tends to sound over produced if there are too many noises at once.

or if your a metal fan, hopesfall and darkest hour..with a bit of year of our lord will make you happy.

zack morris still loves you.

you expect me to read all that? im tired. ill do it tomorrow the get back to you.

i feel like im not explaining this right....blah.

its not a matter of choosing him or me. because.....at the very least i want to be her best friend. she originally didnt even want our relationship to end at all, just not be so exclusive. i'd feel a lot more inclined to tell her to fuck off if i didnt know her so well. itd be like saying fuck off to my sister in a lot of ways. its like, i can hate things she does, but i cant hate her. which is part of the reason i feel like our relationship is so much more than a lot of kids i know....

so, fuck, i dont know. i guess im just scared of losing the romantic side of our relationship. so, boogedy boo.

i'm SO sure she loves me...but i guess the mature thing to do, as someone who respects her and loves her...is to just be level headed w/ her. tell her her faults and what i dont like when its appropriate, and just....be the better person i guess? fuck, love=mass confusion.

but fuck, who knows how i'll feel tommorow.....

my sig kinda ruins the mood of my posts.....

I posted about my dilemma a couple of months ago.. I got some good advice and some bad advice... but I think the one that stood out in my mind the most (and still does to this day) was a reply from Retired Hasbeen that went something like -

"I have learned that if one is a 'soulmate' many people will pass in between both you and them, and that they need freedom from a relationship to grow and expand in life... "

Being in love can sometimes mean setting someone free....

:confused:

well, maybe if you take yourself away from her she'll realize that your the one she wants once things are all in context for her, SHE'LL be the one like "what am i doing?!?!? i miss racecar" (*snicker*) but then again i personally try not to take life advice from a computer screen most of the time.

i figure now is a good time to post something that puts my screwed up "lovelife" out there for others to make fun of (believe me, i deserve it...):

im lazy by nature, i dont do things usually unless i want to, i tend to go to classes and work during the day and then ride my bike at night as well as painting. i always say that i just want to meet a cool girl and shit but i never get around to it. however, last year, a friend told me that this girl had a major crush on me or something, i meet her and shes real cute and the whole deal and super nice to me (for some odd reason), eventually we start going out and all that and i have a major problem with ditching out of hanging out with her to go ride or paint, she was totally supportive of both and stuff which really surprised me, when i talked to her i said i felt bad that i didnt hang out with her more and she was like "its cool, whenever we hang out is fun" now, things like this are not supposed to happen to me, so what do i do? i go and fuck up a good situation, i kept feeling bad for not hanging out with her even though she never got mad in the slightest. I thought she would come to hate me one day for being such a dick and thought she was harboring some kind of subliminal resentment towards me. So i decide to break up with her (came to the conclusion that i was scum, couldnt handle a normal relationship, and although i still liked her, didnt want her to be hurt by me not being a good boyfriend). we'll just skip ahead a few months here...okay, so we're still talking and we're actually pretty good friends, whenever i hang out with her she puts her head on my shoulder and is like "i miss you so much" and i told her i was a dick to her and shouldnt be missed and shes like "no, you were honest and youre the nicest guy ive ever known", im thinking to myself NO, IM NOT, IM AN ASSHOLE, PEOPLE HATE ME!, and eventually i decide that ive can be a good boyfriend to her and tell her that i want to get back with her but that i dont want to screw things up, she says that we can be friends with benefits if i want, so i decide thats a good place to start, so we do that we hang out some and kiss and whatnot and finally i decide that i want a relationship or whatever unfortunately now i dont think she does, ive pretty much given up even though she still calls (proof that i am still screwing this up...) truth is, i have a feeling that i probably could get back with her now, but im asking myself if i really want to, im such an indecisive idiot, i hate my love life and life in general most of the times...this sucks...sorry for typing so much.

sorry to hear you got emo glasses, thats rough.

nsk

so what happened racecar? eh?

-cdz

slash rusty's tires. and break into your girl--pardon me, RUSTY's girl's house and steal all the good stuff then either burn it or break it all. believe me you'll feel a lot better

dude....it sucks i know. ive felt the numbness plenty in my short life span...but you're only a kid, and you WILL get over it. FUCK its sooooo simple! GO to a public place...sit there and just WATCH all the hot ass fuckin girls that walk by. Chances are, half of em are single. chances are some of em like emo. chances are some of em will like guys who have messy hair and do graffiti. Just tell that girl chelsea(fuck that name i got fucked over by a chelsea also) to suck your ass and dont talk to her for a while. She'll get fucked over by "rusty" (another gay name) and come crawling back to you. in the meantime, clean up your act. if you dont have a job, get one. (youll meet lotsa girls this way), trim your hair, buy(steal) some new clothes, start lifting weights and hide from her. Avoid her calls, and shell start missing you. When she finally runs into you, you will be getting buff, and have a hot ass exotic asian girl on your arm. trust me man. ive been through all that shit and sooner or later things get better and YOU WILL MEET COOLER and more innocent girls. I LOVE meeting a girl and finding out shes a virgin who doesnt drink or smoke. good lord thats like finding a can of icy grape on the shelves at michaels. sooo my advice to you is simple...move on, and IMPROVE Your self.

Lifting weights (although takes energy and time) will improve your looks, confidence and even your stamina. (which is a good thing! ) :) haha hope i helped put a smile on your face dude. girls are like hersheys kisses.... unwrap one and you wont be able to stop. haha.

Holy shit man... read IcedOutMocha's post.... that's the best shit I've read for ages..

Vote 1 IOM.

peace...... :) :) :)

i liked icedoutmocha's advice too...but instead of lifting weights I am going to get back into rock climbing..I got so thick doing that shit. plus I feel wierd lifting at the gym..I am the tall skinny guy in a se of muscular meat heads listening to korn on the radio. when i am climbing I am the cute skinny guy that is listening to indie rock or hip hop and contorting his body to do a rought on a wall. girls notice me there..plus you HAVE to walk by the climbing gym windows to walk upstairs to the weight room. Zack Morris is going to get his muscles back..again...RAD!!!..I'm drunk and I will sleep til 5 in the afternoon tomorrow then wake up and play on the computer all day.

This should be recorded. I am about to say something entirely useful without drowning it with hatred and sarcasm. RACECAR, your in a tough spot, you see the facts youve stated are that Rusty is 26, Im 25 and would like to beat Rusty's ass. I had a rusty take a girl from me. Anyways I think the best thing to do is find out where your most comfortable at in the field of revenge. She has already hurt you and she will continue to do so. You need to get out brotha. Go paint, go skate, fuck, walk someones dog. Whatever you do drop her. Stop being nice. Women are going to do this to you for ever. I know it hurts, you love her, but its just PUSSY, that shit is readily available. Unless you live in Tahoe where the supply is far less greater than demand. You should be able to meet other girls. In fact I would talk to girls she doesnt like, be romeo with them, Dont take her to the prom. Tell her how her parents will appreciate rustys age, in fact you could always call and leave them a message "Sound worried" Basically the bottom line is to go out and have fun, you can replace her, and there are upgraded models now available. Hope you feel better.

If you need Ideas for revenge, please let me know!!!!!:idea: :king:

Shitty....

I agree with everyone else. Seems like she's using you. It sounds like no matter what she does, no matter how big of a bitch she can be, you're always there to forgive her. I mean, what the fuck is she doing with a 26 year old named Rusty (Does he have a mullet and drive a beat up truck?)? It'll be hard, and will probably suck ass for months, but you gotta ask her where she stands. If she says she doesn't know, then fuck her. You're the same age as me, man, we've only lived like not even a quarter of our lives. This isn't the be-all end-all. If she's fucking you around like this, maybe she isn't the right one for you. Give her an ultimatum. Either she stops doing shit with this Rusty fag, or that's it. It'll hurt, but it'll be worth it. Trust me.:)

Then you go, get all your friends and fuck Rusty up bad. Vent all your anger on making this fags live miserable.

I don't know if you'll agree with any of this. But oh well.

asshole reply #1: she's getting the dick from rusty up her ass as we speak!!

logical asshole reply: go paint, quit bitching.

real reply.. yer young, 6 monthes aint shit, kid. however.. if you play it right. you can avoid her. but get head every few monthes. and when she's grown up, maybe get together. i couldnt fucking handle all that though. i'd never talk to her again.

oh my fucking shit racecar.

CUT HER THE FUCK OFF! LET GO OF THE BITCH!

damn man. I mean it probably sucks to do that. but if you still want her hanging around just drop her on her ass and shell come crawling back eventually.

Jesus........i feel for you but thats what you have to do. She don't know what the fuck she wants, BUT she knows you'll be right behind her ass eating all hershit. So fucking leave her and serve her right. Then she'll know what the fuck she wants..........JESUS i hate idiot girls like this.................damn man this probably really sucks , but make sure to get shit done.

sorry, but bitches like this should come witha warning tag that says (warning, willing to let go of long relationships, and boyfriends who love them. )

im telling you, you're not an asshole enough to her. Don't fucking call her back, don't do shit. be an asshole and see how the story changes.

and i agree wiuth everyone here that had responses similar to mine.

beleive me. sorry i just got hectic

lololol Just like finding a can of icy grape hahahaha iced out know's were its at

drop her...she thinks that if the 26 year old piece of shit leaves her...you'll always be there. Don't do that to yourself. You've got your own life to worry about. I can't stand games that people play. REMEMBER!!!!! YOU ARE ONLY 17!!!!! You got lots a time and oppotunities ahead of you. It may hurt like hell inside....but in the end it'll be better.

good luck

sounds like a hostage situation...

It'll never end. stay with graffiti, it's less confusing

:mexican: yes cool con 2 needs advice on his harum

PROBLEM NO 1

i had a girl when i just turned 17,we went out for 2 and a half years,i was totally in love,afterwards she got a new boyfriend but we still hung out every once in a while,i moved down south and we had sex before i left,i had her on my mind down south,and didnt go with anyone down there,i come back to philly,and she gets put in a mental home for 2 weeks{acid casualty}she gets out,and she breaks up with her boyfriend and goes to boston,she calls me up the day before she gets back from boston,and we talk for 3 hours on the phone,we hang out like once or twice a month or so throughout the summer,two weeks ago,i call her up,we end up having more sex,i ask if i can call her next week{im in her neighborhood on the weekend}last weekend,we go to my friends house and get really drunk,me and her are the only ones downstairs at the party,i tell her im going to put a movie on,but the tv doesnt work,i put on a cd instead,she said i could sit next to her,she falls asleep in my arms,i fall asleep soon,then i wake up,shes on the other couch,and when she leaves the next day to get into her car,no hug,nothin

problem no 2 coming soon

so here's the deal

shit dude, that's rough. well here's the deal with girls, i've figured this out after having a girfriend for 2 years (but you knew that).

Every girl wants two men. One who's like you and I, we are nice guys that treat girls right and make them feel special. We help them out with their problems and make them feel like goddesses.

The second man is someone who dominates her and makes her feel less than she really is. For some reason girls are attracted to that kind of masculinity bullshit even thought they talk about how immature guys are etc.

I went through the same thing with Emily. She'd always go hang out with other guys and stuff and it really made me mad. And being the softy that i was i'd just be sad about it and it never got better.

For me at least, if you love someone you shouldn't want to spend time with anyone else. When i was in love with Emily i only wanted to hang out with her and no other girls which i guess screwed me because i had to make new friends after she dumped me.

i dont' really know how this would help. but i think you should talk to her (even though it sounds like you've tried that) and tell her that you love her and you don't want to be the guy she can fall back on. But i don't know if i should be giving advice since i'm having girl trouble too. cuz i still have that big crush on that one girl who is going out with the bling machine, even though i've heard he's been partying with girls like Gracie and stuff. anyway though, i guess keep your head up, and uh shit i dunno i guess this was really long for nothing. But if you could get any advice out of this then you're way smarter than me. anyway good luck with it.

Rusty loses major coolness points for dating a seventeen yearold.

if I was you I would clown that fool hard to his face and her face, especially hers. I mean come on.....you got some leverage.

Otherwise give her a taste of her own medicine. Go get some numbers from some ugly girls and tell her how infatuated you are with them.

but then again...the ho ass bitch i dated when i was seventeen(is remy still a bit bitter, better bet your butter im a bit bitter, not really but i was and after she called to ask me to get her a bunch of dope, i took her five hundred dollars and bought my new girlfriend some loungerie i felt a bit less bitter...her and her issues with me always painting shit...allthough lesson learned? girls sometimes arent obcessed with graffiti...and they also cheat with older more "mature" nonwriter ex's (fucking bitch)...)

i really love women. but a bitch can tear your heart up if you let her. the key is not letting them.

bleah bleah bleah........

i think you nead to lay a severly drenching level of sarcasm on her every time you talk to her..be bitter...and let her know your bitter...and clown the 26 year old that steals highschool sweethearts.

girls are not to be trusted. he is fucking her. does someone is who 26 just watch tv with someone who is 16? yea right.

DR. LOVE saves the day..

:king:

You said your how old bro? 17-18? You have alot of time left in your life man, theres no thing that says your gonna meet a girl at 18 and instantly know you wanna marry her. Your a young buck, and i am too for that matter, i hope...and i think that you should just let her go...i thought i was so in love at the age 17....i have never been so WRONG in my life...i pretty much just chilled with other girls after that, goin from one to another, as differences pulled us apart. Then i met this girl i knew way back in the day, and bam weve been togeather for three years..and its been great. Like nothing even close to what i experienced with any other floozie.....my thoughts are, THERE ARE MANY FISH IN THE SEA...if ones not right, throw her back, and by what i have read, shes not right bro, at least not now. Tell her you want to be friends, persue other things...get some alone time..listen to some music, sketch, book, just chill, and life my friend will go as it is planned...ok, im out like a fat bitch in dodgeball...good luck!

listen to mocha...if she wants it she'll come get it...i know it sucks waiting around but that seems like all youre doing anyway...if she is seeing other people than so can you...keep your head up...girls are not worth it...even if you love her...you would probably hate her in 6 months even if things were goin smooth