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the soft drink thread

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by SOZER, Nov 14, 2001.

  1. SOZER

    SOZER Member

    Joined: May 20, 2001 Messages: 418 Likes Received: 0
    okay, theres something for everyone in the circus that is "channel zero" and now theres a place for you to post fond memories of soda. frankly i fucking hate coke and pepsi, theyre gross and leave a fucking caramel film on your mouth and teeth, fuck that shit. i posted this before in another post, but here it is again just because im quite fond of it.

    surge used to be abundant 'round these parts, but as of the past 2 years its like coke cut back their distribution of it so that i cant find it! when i was still in high school when it first came out i would use alot of money to buy it, never eating food, just drinking that sweet green nectar. i actually bought out the vending machine single handedly several times, i wouldnt be seen without a can in my hand, and i was happy, yes truley happy. then at the beginning of my senior year, i strolled down to faithful ol' daisy (betsy is such an unoriginal name for a soda machine dont you thinkg?) only to find that my precious surge had been taken from me, i went through the typical stages of withdrawl: lack of sleep, frequent panic attacks, paranoia, multiple personality disorder, dry mouth, genital warts, burning asshole and the loss of both legs due to tiff with gangrene.

    i thought my precious surge was gone for good.

    however, 5 months ago i found 2 remaining 7-11's that still stock it in theyre big gulp dispensing devices. i dont know how it got there, i dont know how much is left. I believed it to be a cruel joke at first and a single, solitary tear rolled down my cheek in rememberance of the good times we had. in curiousity i pressed the button with my double gulp under the nozzle and to my disbelief it despensed a beautiful green drink into my waiting cup, euphoria came over me as i tried to keep myself from shaking and spilling the cup and my wood from busting the zipper on my pants. i somehow made it to the counter, and gladly paid the cashier for it. wild thoughts ran through my head, "will it be as good as before? does it still live for me the way i do for it?dont trip...dont spill"i considered posing the question to the cashier of where he obtained the drinks syrup, but if high school taught me one thing its that you shouldnt ask questions. that and im sure the cashier wouldnt understand my feelings for what many consider a mere "soft drink". whats been there for me through the good times and the bad? picked me up when i was feeling low? consoled me and assured me that it'll be alright? crack cocaine....but surge helped me out too, even when i battled the crack addiction.

    sometimes on days that i feel bad and whatnot, i go back to old daisy and remember all the good times i had with her, pumping her so full of quarters as a pedophile would pump cum into a 11 year olds coochie.

    im thirsty. time to go pick up my only friend(surge you idiot...)

  2. dik.n.ur.ear

    dik.n.ur.ear Senior Member

    Joined: Jan 5, 2001 Messages: 1,556 Likes Received: 0
    remember "ok cola"? how about "josta"?
  3. Iris

    Iris Banned

    Joined: Sep 2, 2001 Messages: 888 Likes Received: 1
  4. SOZER

    SOZER Member

    Joined: May 20, 2001 Messages: 418 Likes Received: 0
    i also find it comical that Tab has a warning on it that it has been shown to cause cancer. thats when you know your in flavor country.

  5. Remy Martin

    Remy Martin Guest

    sozer you got some issues dude.........
    pedophile references do not make you cool.
  6. rip

    rip Elite Member

    Joined: Nov 10, 2001 Messages: 2,667 Likes Received: 0
    ummm who remembers clear pepsi? ya that was the best dont jock it just rock it.
  7. man, i love coca-cola. sorry you hate it so. and all your other issues, i am sorry to hear that as well.

    best of luck to you.
  8. seeking

    seeking Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: May 25, 2000 Messages: 32,277 Likes Received: 235
    iris, thats vernors prior to their distro deal with pepsi... now the shit is bitch made. vernors 10 years ago was nearly lethal...
  9. Jesus of Nazareth

    Jesus of Nazareth Senior Member

    Joined: Dec 6, 2000 Messages: 2,388 Likes Received: 1
    When I was in KC last weekend, I tried some shit called Jones Soda....good stuff. They have interesting flavors...I believe mine was called "crushed melon. Too bad I can't find it down here. It was good to see that NACE is still up everywhere around those parts.
  10. SOZER

    SOZER Member

    Joined: May 20, 2001 Messages: 418 Likes Received: 0
    jones...i have a long and painful history with that too...i was looking for something to fill the huge void left by surge when i found jones to be popping up here and there, and suddenly it was everywhere, i was drinking it frequently, bluebubblegum, cream soda, fufu berry, cherry and green apple were my poisons. plus it came in a glass bottle so you could break it open barfight style after downing a bottle and lunge at the store clerk with it, tearing into the soft flesh of his throat in order to liberate all the jones from the store. at one point my friend and i would drive directly to the beverage center after school and pick up a case of 24 bottles for 20 bucks, take it home and split it, we collected the empties, i think at one point i had 200 on my shelf and it began to overtake my room. i stumbled upon a soapbox derby race one morning last year only to find that the jones bus was there, they were giving out free jones and whatnot, i got so much free shit from them, the least of which being a rather large jones banner that now adorns my wall. the other prize i had was that, as the show was ending, the manager just let me take all the untaken jones, thats 4 cases of free jones. thats 96 free bottles, at the time i didnt have my car with me so i put all the soda into a shopping car and pulled it home on my bike for 5 miles, it was welllllllllllllllllllll worth it though, i was sitting pretty for days on end.

    unfortunately, i drank 15 bottles of "happy" in one day and got really sick, i regretted that somewhat. and over time drinking all that jones sort of burned me out on it, i really dont want to drink it anymore...ever again. and now that i have surge back i dont have to.

    i actually look at jones now and feel sick, thats a sign that i overkilled i think.

  11. T.T Boy

    T.T Boy Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: May 18, 2001 Messages: 21,803 Likes Received: 41
    damn, i was just craving that.
  12. seven.13

    seven.13 Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Oct 5, 2000 Messages: 3,572 Likes Received: 19
    I got a free sample CD years ago for trying a cute little cup of Crystal Pepsi in some mall in Florida.

    3 summers ago they built this huge Basilica out of Coke cans here..iIdont think have flicks though.
  13. fr8lover

    fr8lover Guest

    man they got people hooked on surge cia drop it into south central style...they had six packs for 99 cents when it first came out, i got hooked on it in middle school, im talking taking out 2 liter bottles of that stuff...then they jacked the price and people would keep buying it...man, i got sick of that stuff anyway.
  14. YourWelcome

    YourWelcome Member

    Joined: Nov 11, 2001 Messages: 267 Likes Received: 0
    i love...

    ORANGE SODA! Sunkist, Minutemaid, bootleg, any orange soda is great!
  15. graffitiSUX

    graffitiSUX Senior Member

    Joined: May 18, 2001 Messages: 1,659 Likes Received: 0
    orangina from france. fuck the rest