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Agt. Adopus

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Woman Masturbates To Concept Of Commitment

PORTAGE, MI—Soaking in her bathtub Tuesday, area resident Linda Marston, 32, pleasured herself over the thought of a long-term committed relationship. "Mmmm... oh, yeah, baby... I want to settle down with you forever," moaned the never-married Marston, as she gently massaged her clitoris with two fingers. "Oh, God, yes... two kids, maybe three... and a house in the country. Big swingset in the backyard." Several hours later, Marston masturbated again to the idea of loving someone unconditionally through good times and bad.

- theonion.com :lol:

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Guest KING BLING

Gemini: (May 21—June 21)

After weeks of deliberation, you have yet to hear a compelling argument for not beating most of the people you've ever met to within an inch of their lives.

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Originally posted by KING BLING

Gemini: (May 21—June 21)

After weeks of deliberation, you have yet to hear a compelling argument for not beating most of the people you've ever met to within an inch of their lives.

 

hahaha i was just gonna tell you to stop looking for reasoning.

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