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Televangelists never lie. Ever.

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by Cup-O-Pizza, Jul 23, 2002.

  1. Cup-O-Pizza

    Cup-O-Pizza New Jack

    Joined: Jul 23, 2002 Messages: 25 Likes Received: 0
    I was thinking about the rules and terms of most religions, and I realized there's really only one simple rule connecting all religions: You have to "believe" in the god or gods depending on the religion you practice. Sounds easy, right?

    I'm not a religious guy, but I am spritual. That being the case organized religions make me shudder, and have always seemed shady to me. "Just believing" sounds like an easy way out; a free ticket to eternal love and peace, or whatever your heaven promises. But think about what happens when you just "believe". If you truly believe then you give yourself to the cause. If you give yourself to the cause what easier way is there to be controlled by the people you look to for guidance, i.e. clergyman, priests, pastors, rabbi's, whatever? When you put yourself in that position, to be totally controlled by a religious figure, that's when shit like molestation starts. When the clergyman start feeling so powerful and divine they can molest altar boys and get away with it you know somthing is wrong with that mind set. Not so much the religon (although I dont agree with it), but the mindset of giving another human being control over you. They are, after all, just human beings. The only difference is that you trust this person to talk to god on a higher level than you, so your trust is instilled in this human being. After a while somthing like that could go to a guy's head.

    Another aspect of the controlling issue is the use of fear. Most religions play on the human instinct of fearing things you're unsure of. When I was younger and my father had just become a born-again Christian, he started showing me all the prophecy movies and doccumentaries on Hell, basically trying to scare me into the religion. It affected me then but it fucking pisses me off now. If there is a god worshipped by an organized religion, I would hope he/she would be divine enough to want people to love him/her, not fear him/her.

    I have yet to find an honest religion I could ever truly believe in. I enjoy staying up until 3:00 AM watching Benny Hinn and all these other bullshit con artists tricking hundreds of thousands of people. I love watching these motherfuckers, it amazes me. I wonder to myself if they actually believe their own bullshit. I'm not sure anything pisses me off more than a televangelist. I love the fact they sit in huge golden throwns on cheap sets, completely surrounded by fresh flowers and pictures of Jesus, completely decked out in custom tailored suits and more "bling bling" than your average Poof Diddy, then they have the audacity to ask for money. I about throw the TV out the fucking window when they beat around the bush and ask for money. The prayer at the end is the best though. When Benny Hinn "channels" god's power and talks directly to people through the TV set. "Theres a man. A man named John. You have cancer. You have cancer of the lungs, and Jesus is with you right now. He's taking away the pain". Bullshit.

    The only good thing about Benny Hinn is that the sad people who actually believe in him are happy people. I wish I could get that
    excited over nothing, but I'm happy for them. Whatever works for them.

    Yours Truly-
    Naven Johnson
     
  2. !CEBERG

    !CEBERG Member

    Joined: Apr 13, 2002 Messages: 444 Likes Received: 0
    religion is a man made idea

    of course its not perfect

    im one of the most religious people youll ever meet, well not really but my faith is strong, but im not suprised people manipulate things to meet their ends (i.e. religion) its in human nature to do so

    a lot of people have a problem, they put divine ideas on the shoulders of humans and are suprised when things dont go smoothly

    so naven, i basically see it like this, there are so many variables as to why things are, as to why people act the way they do, but you will never figure all of it out, your a sucker if you try, just learn to accept what is and not what should be

    what makes you better then benny hinn? is it because your preach on internet forums and not on television? their ideas are theirs, your ideas are yours, mines mine, as simple as that

    You've never lied. Ever.
     
  3. ledzep

    ledzep Junior Member

    Joined: Feb 21, 2002 Messages: 146 Likes Received: 1
    im a religious person.
    and as such i must say that i dont like people who try to make others feel like thier religion is wrong.
    i also dont like people who market religion.
    i also feel that if you were a good person, youd go to heaven, regardless of religion.
     
  4. Smart

    Smart Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Apr 14, 2000 Messages: 17,017 Likes Received: 174
    so, a couple years ago God says to Benny Hinn:

    "Benny my boy, the people need a great big temple in Texas!"

    So Benny tells the people and the people pony up something like 14 million dollars. But, in the mean time, God gets with Benny again and tells him how the market is all fucked up and Texas is really freakn hot... So, Benny just keeps the money... though he did build his $300,000 home...
     
  5. Cup-O-Pizza

    Cup-O-Pizza New Jack

    Joined: Jul 23, 2002 Messages: 25 Likes Received: 0
    Hey i completey understand that views are views no matter who you are, and I dont intend to change Benny Hinn or any body else when it comes to beliefs, but I'll tell you what makes me better than Benny Hinn: I don't prey on misled lost people to make a quick buck. I don't frown on crusading ministeries in the slightest, but it's when you go on TV and convince people you're channeling the power of the All Mighty to heal people, when all you're really doing is smacking an actor's head and watching them flop around on the floor. Thats what makes me better than Benny Hinn.
    Other than that we're all human beings and we're all capable of pulling one over on people, so I can cut 'ole Benny some slack there. I guess what makes him so bad is not only the massive scale he and his Televangelist friends are doing this on, it's just that they are the immbodiment of cruel intentions. Speaking of Cruel Intentions Reese Witherspoon is the hottest milf on the planet. But what i'm saying though is that it makes me cringe to watch these blind masses get taken advatage of, but if thats there choice i say go for it. This is my choice and i'm sticking to it.
     
  6. I went to a Catholic high school and was good friends with a bunch of the jesuit priests, they were both rowdy drunken fools and incredibly smart people, very low bullshit content. It's amazing how different it is to be taught by someone that has genuine interest in helping you, versus someone who wants your money or assurance of personal salvation.

    Anyways, so one the priests, my english teacher, tells me that this healer guy is coming to church next week, and that he's the real thing. We laugh and joke about it, but he's like "I don't know what the fuck is up with him, but he'll knock you out... just come and you'll see."

    So me and a couple of friends show up, still joking and everything, sit through mass, and then people start lining up. We stand in there giggling and shit, and this dude starts uttering things in latin, touching people in the head, and they just drop like rag dolls. People behind them catch them, and just lay them on the floor. We still laugh, but we're getting nervous... there's a bunch of people straight up passed out on the floor by now. Some of them get up, some cry, some sit catatonic. We stop giggling.

    BOOM, my best friend goes down next to me, victim of the gentle touch. I'm fucking scared now. Dude comes up in front of me, starts saying those weird things, and places his finger on my forehead, giving the slightest of pushes.





    I was off flying, dude. It was like one of those headrush things you get when you hyperventilate and stand up too fast, but my vision clouded and my body failed. I barely felt the hands catch me, definitely didn't feel being placed on the floor. I got back up, feeling like I've been asleep and dreaming for hours, expecting to be in my room or something, finding instead a bunch of people laying next to me and slowly standing up. For the next 2 or 3 days, I felt that strange body electricity you get when you've got too much caffeine in you, kind of an Ecstasy effect. I felt no need to drink, party or anything for some time, and neither did my friends. We just sat around and chilled, laughed, and were happy in general. Now I honestly don't care if we were more victims of hypnosis or suggestion than divine power, the fact remains: That guy fucking knocked me out by touching my forehead. Shit's crazy. Beer,

    El Mamerro
     
  7. Smart

    Smart Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Apr 14, 2000 Messages: 17,017 Likes Received: 174
    Mamerro, that's Benny Hinn's whole shtick... on TV he's always got all these people laying around him on the stage...
     
  8. Yeah, Benny Hill always had the fly bitches around.



    What I felt was different was that TV evangelists put on this huge show, shake and scream and then they fucking whiplash people to the point the have no option but fall on their asses. This guy just came up all chill and touched people. And people on the floor didn't tremble or speak in toungues or whatever. Very, very low key.

    A big factor was the fact that I WANTED it to work. One of the most important things about hypnosis... you must have a willing disposition to be hypnotized. Once you start seeing people fall down you begin to believe shit works, and by the time the guy gets to you, you're pretty much sure you're gonna get knocked out too. One of my friends fought it pretty hard, and stayed up and conscious the whole time, but not without some visible struggle. He staunchily believed it was bullshit, but seeing all the people fall down weakened his stance a bit, and made him wobble when the time came. Like I said, I don't care if it was bullshit or not, the ends justified the means. Beer,

    El Mamerro
     
  9. girl-lies

    girl-lies Junior Member

    Joined: May 10, 2002 Messages: 199 Likes Received: 0
    i go by my own set of rules when it comes to religion.. i just believe there is something 'up' there.. if that isnt good for 'your god' i dont want to go anyway.
     
  10. Smart

    Smart Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Apr 14, 2000 Messages: 17,017 Likes Received: 174
    I like the closing credits on Benny Hill

    ... yeah, that's Hinn's style, just 2 fingers to the forehead and a couple big guys that catch the folks when they start to fall...
     
  11. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Guest

    http://www.unclemelon.com/melonade25.jpg'>

    I'd gladly send this man my money!
     
  12. http://www.aloha.net/~mikesch/Hinn-Nashville.jpg'>

    I'm the guy on the floor with the shoes and the pants.
     
  13. Cup-O-Pizza

    Cup-O-Pizza New Jack

    Joined: Jul 23, 2002 Messages: 25 Likes Received: 0
    http://www.aloha.net/~mikesch/hinn-tbn.jpg'>

    Give me some fuckin' Mula!!!

    WOO HOOOOOOO! MAKIN' MONAAAAAY! ALLRAAAAAGHT!

    AWE YAY-UH! BOOYAH! Uh! Uh! MAKIN' SOME BANANAS WOO!
     
  14. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Guest

    I think that benny hin would look good with some kidblount glasses !
     
  15. ctrl+alt+del

    ctrl+alt+del Guest

    i saw a shirt on the internet, it said

    Atheism is a non-profit organization. It made me laugh.

    i think organized religion is bs. just because you go to church doesnt make you a good person. just because you dont go to church doesnt mean that your a bad person.


    hahaha and just because you go to jesus camp in canada doesnt mean you arnt a horrible bitch.
     
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