~KRYLON2~ Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 I Smell Bacon Six months ago, I got my drivers license suspended due to a 12-point violation. Now I want to make it very clear that I rarely speed. And when I do speed, I never go more than 10 miles over the speed limit. I have gotten busted for going as low as 6 miles over the speed limit and I once even got a ticket for going 4 miles under the speed limit. My problem isn’t blatant disrespect for the law. My problem is my unwillingness to blow some fat balding pig in a uniform. So, like I said before, I suffered a six month suspension and my insurance skyrocketed. Obviously, it would have been impossible for me to hold a job without transportation, so I had to spend a ridicules amount of money on some piece of shit lawyer to get me work driving privileges. Ironically, I would have had to spend less time and money obtaining these ‘privileges’ if I had received a DUI. If you ask me, a person with a belly full of vodka is more of a danger to the road than little ol’ me who got caught going 31 in a 25. And besides, was the court trying to punish me for speeding or put me on welfare? The justice system is all fucked up. So last weekend, I’m driving to work when suddenly I smell bacon. I check my rearview mirror and sure enough one of the swine is tailing me. I check my speed limit real quick and I see that I am going EXACTLY the speed limit. I briefly wonder to myself what the little piggy is doing following me when he could be cramming donuts in gluttonous face. Someone even told me that they were having a sale on glazed this week... As I’m thinking this to myself, I see the flashing lights. Fuck me! Could the limey bastard read my mind now? Obediently, I pull over and go searching through my bag looking for my driving privileges. I hear a tap on the window. I roll it down and come face-to-face with the fattest police officer I have ever seen in my life. I mean, how did this guy get through the academy?! He looked like he had never run a mile in his whole heart problem ridden LIFE. I’m sorry, looking at porky pig and his multitude of chins did not make me feel safe. How was this guy supposed to defend me against the dregs of society? He broke a sweat waddling to my fucking car! "Ma’am, can I see your license and registration?" "My drivers license was suspended, sir. But I got driving privileges for work…which is where I’m heading" (I showed him my paperwork) "Ma’am, do you realize that today is the 29th?" "Yessir, I realize that they expire today and I have plans to go to the BMV Monday and get my license back..." "But they expired on the 19th...ten days ago." (Sound of me banging my head up against the steering wheel) "Step out the car please." So he frisked me, cuffed me and carted me off to jail. A friend of mine bailed me out of jail ($250) and I was late to work The next day, I called the tow company and learned the my license plates were seized and I would have to get new ones to get my car back. Well I couldn’t get new plates until I paid my re-registration fee to the BMV and since I needed my ID to do this, I made a trip up to the tow company to get my wallet out of my car. (I wasn’t allowed to get my belongings before my car was towed) Surprise, surprise. My wallet was stolen. So I couldn’t get my ID. So I couldn’t get my license back. So I couldn’t get new plates. So I couldn’t get my car. Obviously perturbed, I demanded to speak to a manager. "My wallet was stolen. All my credit cards, money, and ID were in there." "We’re not liable." "Whaddaya mean, ‘your not liable?’ I am paying you a shit load of money to keep my car and it’s contents safe! Who the fuck is liable then?!" "I’ve worked here for 20 years and we’ve never had anything stolen out of a car...yada, yada, yada..." "So WHAT?! How many wallets have to be stolen before you DO something about it?" "What do you suggest I do? Confront all my employees and call them all thieves? Is that how things are handled in your place of employment?" "Every job I’ve had, someone is held responsible for the valuables. When money is stolen, someone is usually fired and the person is compensated. I think that’s how things are handled in the real world." He walked away from me. I called the police. They informed me that they weren’t liable. At this point, I got furious. I mean, when I’m going a little over the speed limit, I got 12 pigs following me with hard-ons. But when something is stolen from me, when a taxpaying citizen has been violated, NO ONE IS FUCKING LIABLE!!! So I said to myself, fuck the law. I borrowed my friends car (Thanks Erin) and drove all over the state of Ohio gathering up all the paperwork I needed to get my car back. Four days and $500 in fees later, I am on the road again. And if anyone visiting this site is a ‘police officer’ from the state of Ohio, I have but one thing to say to you: EAT ME PIGGY! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Æ° Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 You just can't fucking win. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ctrl+alt+del Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 i didnt know you were a chick all that shit sucks though, sounds like you got hit with a wave of bad luck. things cant get much worse from here, can they? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JUDONO? Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 Damn girl you have some bad luck, I feel for You. Have you ever tried to fight all those tickets You got? Cause I have won some cases cause the pig that gave me the ticket didnt show up. And You should always ask a pig why he pulled you over for thats the first thing You should ask the fucking pigs!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vinyl junkie Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 i've quit driving because of shit like that... gonna wait a bit until my rates go down and what not sos i can afford insurance and registration... on the plus side, i've gotten in way better shape than i was from all this bike riding... my worst story along these lines: driving on a suspended liscence (suspended for unpaid fix-it tickets for registration) pulled over for driving in the bike lane (went into the bike lane over the dotted line, just getting around a car that was turning left) i was arrested and released, my truck was impounded... needed to register it to get it back out... couldn't register it without paying old tickets and fines (which involved getting a buddy to drive me to three different counties, about 200 miles over the course of the day) found out that driving on a suspended liscence in an unregistered vehicle is supposed to be an automatic 30 day impound (at about $100 or so a day it would total 2 times what i paid for the truck) but the lady at the cop shop was dope and signed it off anyway... all in all i paid about $800 to get my truck back... but now i also had a newly legal liscence and current registration so that was good i guess... however 3 days later i blew the pumpkin... fuck cars... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
B_As_In_Bot Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 Ride the bus.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daze One Million Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 damn girl you got straight up fucked over big time download "Bone Thugs -N- Harmony - Fuck Da Police" should cheer you right on up...bone thugs is from cleveland...some residents feel ya on that one obviously Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IDrinkSprite Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 :lol: female:lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sean Daley Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 http://www.spicyturkey.com/nostoppingstop.jpg'> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scumdog Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 fuck the police......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Intangible Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 get a bus pass like me... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dick Quickwood Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 when im mad i like to paint and then im not mad no more Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kettiecat Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 You should ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS fight your driving tickets in court. If you win or the cop don't show you walk out free as a bird. You can cal the city prosecutor and normally they will bargain it down to a fine and no points. The judge often lowers the charge. I've worked in the court system for a year and a half now and I've only seen a hand full of cases where the person had to pay the original ticket and such. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~KRYLON2~ Posted July 2, 2003 Author Share Posted July 2, 2003 Originally posted by ctrl+alt+del i didnt know you were a chick all that shit sucks though, sounds like you got hit with a wave of bad luck. things cant get much worse from here, can they? what the fuck who said anything about being a chick????? i got the article from this website http://www.truthhurts.org/police.php lol.....damn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
•nakEd Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 "Ma’am, can I see your license and registration?" you convienced everyone that, that happen to you.. by not sayin it was an article dumbass Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~KRYLON2~ Posted July 2, 2003 Author Share Posted July 2, 2003 :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kr430n5_666 Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 http://www.hsj.org/cl/shades033/images/smoochy.jpg'> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~KRYLON2~ Posted July 2, 2003 Author Share Posted July 2, 2003 http://www.hsj.org/files/feedback-banner.gif'> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kr430n5_666 Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 http://www.hsj.org/cl/shades033/images/solar.jpg'> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~KRYLON2~ Posted July 2, 2003 Author Share Posted July 2, 2003 http://www.cafeshops.com/cp/img/spacer.gif'> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~KRYLON2~ Posted July 2, 2003 Author Share Posted July 2, 2003 http://www.disinfo.com/phpAds/adimage.php?filename=468animfauxbanner.gif&contenttype=gif'> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crave Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 Originally posted by ~KRYLON2~ what the fuck who said anything about being a chick????? i got the article from this website http://www.truthhurts.org/police.php lol.....damn aaahhhh haha, that made me lol.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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