SOme Drinking Stories

Give up some good drunk'n blurs as best you can

ok...my friend, the wannabe ninja, and I climbed through the back

window of this restaurant and grabbed tons o' wine. He was the least

slick ninja ever!! The managed to spill half a dozen beers and break two bottles of wine before setting off the cash register alarm.

but I shouldn't be talking about that.

So we got about 20 bottles of wine, and got drunk like the homeless.

After scattering bottles (empty) all over the dowtown core, we got tired

of lurking in bushes (still like ninjas) and headed down to the river.

I think we both fell in. Then we climbed on top of a hockey statium

to dry off. Eventually the cops were called and we fled. I think we

got into a fight with some punks, then with ourselves, then with some ninjas. Then he beat me at streetfighter and I kicked the nintendo across

the room. then the rest was a blur...

fuck I miss high school.

I don't miss high school

one night in windsor ontario i got piss drunk at the bars and it was time to go home. along the way my buddy kicked a sign which fell off, and looked like a good souvenior for the night. as i placed it on the trunk of the car out of nowhere comes a cop. asking me to put the sing back i do thinking it will be okay. then he asks me to come the car. i thought it would be a little chit-chat. suddenly he pulls my head into the top of the car with my shirt and jacks me in the face. i run 3 blocks down an alley and run out of room. i jump behind a dumpster with nowhere to go. finally the cops turn down the alley and their lights hit me just right. i try to run again but am caught. when the cops finally get to me i free myself and come out. 4 more punches to the face and the paddy wagon comes. about 45 minutes later i end up in jail with no shoes on, because they were lost from the run. the next morning i get out only charged with drunk in public, instead of all i could be charged with. i pay about 65 to get out and pay somone to go to court for me, and get sent a fine of i think 45. getting caught drunk in canada is better than america. the end of a boring story.

Cops in Windsor are crazy parro...

we were there one on a boat in the river.

There was a stop sign next to a dumpster.

My freind went to pick it up, then a cop jumped out of nowhere

and asked where he got the sign. He told him it was next to the

dumpster. Cop just shit on us and told us to put it back in the dumpster.

In windsor it's stealing if you take garbage.

a few of my old high school highlights:

my friends and i drinking 40s and morgan original, going to the mall, leaving the mall, i wake up the next morning with an uneaten melting nutty buddy in my pocket and apparently i had bought the no limit TRU tape (tape and this being only about 3 years ago)..

smoking northern lights and drinking 40s (not a regular occurance), we went to burger king late night and i proceeded to crack out while pissing at the urinal and laughing my ass off, i had to rest my head on the wall and i was literally screaming with laughter...friends left, security guard enters and im still laughing my ass off, turn around and make a weird sound and prematurely zip up and leave.

puking on a girl i knew at an all day bash at a lake, forgetting how i got to my friends house and waking up in his car, throwing up as a pizza guy came to the door and eating a slice, followed by puking it up looking like it had before i ate it. met up with parents and held vomit in the top of my throat through a good 20 minute lecturing about being late while covered in sand and vomit...i told them i hadnt been drinking.

playing quarters for a couple hours at a party a few blocks by my house. forgetting just how long a few blocks are, i told my friends id be right back and proceeded to walk, got dizzy and threw up in a persons yard. after that apparently the beer shits came on sooner than not and i took a shit in their next door neighbors yard, walked home and puked on the doorstep.

went camping and at a reasonably early time, probably 11:30 everyone was already tanked and most were chilling around the fire or walking around...meanwhile i was jumping around talking loudly about how drunk i was, and about "how cool it was to find that joint in my pack of cigarettes" when the people i was talking to got a weird look and i turned to my right and a foot away were two country bumpkin county cops shining a light in my face asking me how old i was. we had to pour about 2 1/2 cases of beer and 3 bottles of liquor out, but they let us stay...

if i remember more ill write em.

my head hurts.

while visiting my friend in the middle of nowhere, upstate NY, we got pretty loaded at the bar.

after leavong the bar, we see a BMX bike on the ground. My friend suggests that I grab it and go for a ride.

So I go and I notice people chasing me and I just go faster, making turns and eluding everyone, including myself.

When I start to sober up, I see that I have no idea where I am. I was on a country road and there were cornfields all around.

I had to call my friends on the cell phone and they had to get the cops to help find me.

The stupid hillbilly cops thought it was funny and I got a ride back to my hotel. I didn't even gett in trouble for stealing the bike.

Me and my friends were walking from the liquor stoe to a party carrying our beer when we decided to stop and open a few. We sat down on a bench in this little park behind these really nice houses. Well, a few becoame pretty much all of them, and we statred being loud and disruptive. I'm sitting there on the bench when I turned to see a blurry white car driving up onto the field. I'm like, "hey guys, some kids are driving on the park" for them to reply "it's the cops!" and take off. We start running, but my dumb fuck friends actually ran with their alcohol in their hands, one of them carrying a half full case. Me and this other guy got away, but they caught the other three. Slapped them with $150 tickets for being drunk in public. They were pissed that we got away too. Since only one of them was 18, they let him go and drove the other two home for a grilling from their parents. We met up with the other guy at the party, got even more drunk, and went and egged the house that we assumed called the cops to shit. We tagged on their cars, and their house. It was fun.:)

This other time we got this one kid, the stereotypical nerd that everybody knows, drunk for the first time. And we got him DRUNK. We bought him all this hard liquor, and he just kept pounding it back. He would drink coffee mugs full of Jack Daniels or Southern Comfort. He'd already drank enough to get experienced drinkers like us pretty drunk, and this was his first time. We were all drunk too, so we wandered around the neighbourhood in one big drunken group, before heading back to his house. This is a kid who's parents control his life, and we're all downstairs at like 3 in the morning with his DVD Player on full volume, we're all yelling, he's slurring and can't even stand up, he's bringing all his dad's liquor downstairs. I think we ordered a pizza, which I'm pretty sure he paid for. I can't really remember, it was all a blur. Anyway, he is still pounding back alcohol at like 5 o'clock, when the thought of alcohol poisoning dawns on us. So two of us (one was me) decided to stay around to make sure nothing bad happened while the rest went home. We got him to stop drinking, and told him to go to bed. As soon as he stands up from the chair he's been sitting at for like 3 hours BAM! he flies stright into a wall, making the biggest noise he possibly could. He's gurgling and slurring, we drag him into bed and he starts freaking out like "am I gonna die guys?". We finally get him to go to sleep, sleep for about three hours, get up beore his parents do, took one look at the huge mess both their house and their son was in, and got the fuck out of there. His dad came down later to find his son passed out on his bed, vomit and garbage everywhere, a dent in the wall, pizza on the floor and the walls, the TV still on, and all of his liqour sitting on the table. He's not allowed to come out with us anymore.

I HAVE ABOUT A MILLION DRINKING STORIES AND A THOUSAND BEER RUN STORIES BUT THESE TWO INVOLVE SHIT;

IVE HAD GUNS PULLED ON ME, BROOMS SWUNG AT ME, ASTAPLER THROWN AT MY HEAD, AND ONCE CHASED BY THE PIGS, BUT THIS WAS THE FUNNIEST INCIDENTS. MY HOMEBOYS AND ME WERE ALL FUCKED UP. I USED TO BE LIKE EASTSIDE ALLSTAR WHEN IT COMES TO BEERRUNS AND I CHALLENGED MY 2 HOMEBOYS TO DO A RUN. THEY COME BACK WITH 1 20 PACK OF BUD, ME ,BEING DRUNK AND FEELIN MACHO,TALKS A GANG OF SHIT AND DECIDES TO GO ON A RUN MYSELF. MY HOMEBOY DRIVES AND I WALK IN GRAB 2 20 PACKS AND BONE OUT. ON THE WAY OUT SOME FUCKEN PUNKASS CHOLO STRAIGHT UP COCKS BACK AND PUNCHES ME AS HARD AS HE COULD. I DROP 1 PACK AND WITH MY FREE HAND CLIP HIM BACK, STUPID FUCKER HAD SOME HOODRATAS WITH HIM AND I GUESS HE WANTED TO IMPRERSS THEM BUT ALL HE DID WAS STUN ME, AND WHEN I HIT HIM BACK I COLD BUSTED HIS NOSE, LUCKY SHOT. THE FUNNY THING IS I HAD HAD TO TAKE A SHIT BEFORE AND HE HIT ME SO FUCKEN HARD I SHIT MY PANTS!!! I WAS ALSO BLEEDIN FROM MY EAR THATS HOW HARD IT WAS. ANYWAYS AFTERHITTIN HIM BACK I BOOKED IT TO MY HOMEBOYS RIDE BUT I WAS SO DISORIENTED I RAN AROUND AND JUMPED INTO THE DRIVERSIDE WINDOW WITH MY SHITTY ASS OUT THE WINDOW. HE DROVE ME ALL THE WAY HOME,3 OR 4 BLOCKS, WITH ME HALF OUT THE CAR. I GOT TO THE PAD YELLIN AND AFTER RILING MY HOMIES UP JUMPED IN THE SHOWER AND WASHED MY ASS. THEY WENT TO LOOK FOR THE FOOL BUT DIDNT FIND HIM LUCKY FOR HIM CUZ THEY WAS DEEP,DRUNK AND STRAPPED.THE FUNNY THING WAS I GOT SYMPATHY PUSSY FOR THAT STORY THE NEXT DAY!!!!

MY OTHER STORY WAS WHEN MY COUSIN GOT OUT OF PRISON AND WE HAD A PARTY FOR HIM. AFTER WE HAD A SICK SESSION AT MY NEIGHBORS PAD AND MY CUZ GOT FUCKEN FADED(HE WAS24 AND HAD BEEN LOCKED FOR 6 YEARSSO HE HAD SOME CATCHIN UP TO DO) WALKIN UP MY DRIVEWAY THAT FOOL CROUCHED DOWN AND CRAPPED HIS PANTS AND THEN WE HAD TO PICK HIM UP AND CARRY HIM INTO THE HOUSE AND HE DRUG SHIT ALL OVER THE HOSE TO THE SHOWER, MY MOM WAS LAUGHING SO HARD.

o.k i have way too many........

but heres a gem im rather proud of.

walking back from the bar one night me and the boys were quite hosed so on the way out of downtown we walk past this big olympic training park place. its got like 3 gyms huge weight room. 3 pools. and one of those olymipc sized diving boards. and were walking by and my buddy sees a door open. nice, the side door of the place was unlocked. so were like party in the pool!!!!!! anyways, we get into this place. its huge and empty... were thinking this is gonna be great. so were all drunk as shit running around the whole place trashing shit and just being idiots. then we decide to have the drunk diving contest. were all up on those super high olympic diving borads doing tricks off em. still in our clothes and shoes. soaking wet. so this is going on for like half an hour. this asian janitor comes in and sees us. we yell and eventually throw him in the pool. and he runs away and calls the cops. they came in and caught us all jumping off the diving oards and in the pool. we all ended up spending the evening in the drunk tank soaking fucking wet. it was well worth it.

i puked:rolleyes:

Originally posted by T.T Boy

o.k i have way too many........

 

but heres a gem im rather proud of.

walking back from the bar one night me and the boys were quite hosed so on the way out of downtown we walk past this big olympic training park place. its got like 3 gyms huge weight room. 3 pools. and one of those olymipc sized diving boards. and were walking by and my buddy sees a door open. nice, the side door of the place was unlocked. so were like party in the pool!!!!!! anyways, we get into this place. its huge and empty... were thinking this is gonna be great. so were all drunk as shit running around the whole place trashing shit and just being idiots. then we decide to have the drunk diving contest. were all up on those super high olympic diving borads doing tricks off em. still in our clothes and shoes. soaking wet. so this is going on for like half an hour. this asian janitor comes in and sees us. we yell and eventually throw him in the pool. and he runs away and calls the cops. they came in and caught us all jumping off the diving oards and in the pool. we all ended up spending the evening in the drunk tank soaking fucking wet. it was well worth it.

Ahahahahahahaha! You win!

I think I've been there, what street is it on?

so i went over my only friends house today...he had a shit load of homebrew that he had been experimenting on for the past 2 weeks i hadnt seen him...im looking at it, and it doesnt look too good, but i drink some for the hell of it and it ends up tasting a little strange, but deffinately drinkable...5 large glasses of homebrew later....that shit was week...i barely had a buzz off that shit, so we go get the beefeater gin out and take a few shots...much better...being the loser that i am, i suggest that we use his dreamcast, well, the 2 weeks that i hadnt seen him for it seems his dreamcast broke...so im thinking what can we do...paint? naw, its steady pouring outside...watch a cheesy movie, fuck it, wasnt in the mood...i really wanted to play some video games...so i notice my friends old genesis gathering alot of dust in the corner and ask him if that works...try it...okay, we hook it up (took a bit but we eventually got it to work) and turn it on...we end up playing batman returns for a few hours....anyways...im home now, ready to crash a little early since ive been stayin up fairly late and waking up really early all week, well that homebrew really did a number on my stomach...its hurting pretty badly and i not feelin too well...im going to try to get some sleep, but i dont know...my advice is not to drink homebrew...ever, this is terrible...im not feeling good at all...maybe he didnt prepare that shit right or somethin, ive heard some homebrew is excellent....

hahah bump for drunkin fun

memories:lick: :lick: :lick: :lick: :lick: :lick: :lick: :lick: :lick: :lick:

as soon as fr8oh gets back from his AA meeting, i bet he could share some of his experiences with us...

i'm saying doh...

i have so so so many of these. they're usually pretty beat though unless you were there. i'll have to try and dig up some goodies...

montreal was certainly a good one but i've been thru that 10 times over.

AST can elude to a nite or two drinkin it up. bombing shit up all liquored up and riding a motorscooter thru williamsburg.

dr.dazzle> its by 17th ave. email me again. we gotta talk sometime on aim or smething. and yeah that shit was fun as hell.

i see your point, theyre not as cool of you werent there. i have so many, i could put those pussies from cky2k or whatever to shame.