remember that thread about urinals with a vacuum hose for women?

finally something that makes sense.

click here for the real ill na na!

she even blinks and averts her eyes ashamedly after the dirty deed

thats probably the fastest ive ever seen a girl take off her under pants.

:lol: :lol: is that for real?

still hilarious although me and yucko had a thread on this a little bit back.

damn it. i lost.

forwarded

i want to see what a woman thinks about this

I sooo just masturbated to that.

:)

ahhh-ha-ha...look how proud she was to be peeing standing up!

yah...I know its animation...but...whatever.

funny shit.

there is no way you could get an adequate seal with a cardboard tube to prevent leakage.

i'm talking about dripping down your leg. fark that. i aim better without a cardboard helper.

I was thinking that this would kindof be big help for women at concerts and big events where there are only nasty ass pissed allover porta-pots

naw man, the patented hover method kills all others... that cardboard thing i think would leak and you'd not only get it down your leg but on your hands, women have learned to adapt i think.

makes for great golden showers

Originally posted by ubejinxed

naw man, the patented hover method kills all others... that cardboard thing i think would leak and you'd not only get it down your leg but on your hands, women have learned to adapt i think.

I guess it just goes to show how little we know. So Im trying to figure this out ya'll stnd over the toilet, like climb up ont he sides.

there's a whole web page about it

http://www.morphizm.com/textualities/fuhoverpiss1.html

It's called the Hover-Piss.

You're probably already familiar with the position if you go to the gym, like every woman in America. And you may be well-practiced in it if you are concerned, again, like every woman in America, with the size of your ass. It's the same position used for squats at the gym but is infinitely more useful in a public restroom.

Stand with your legs about hip-width apart and slowly lower your butt towards the toilet, like a mothership looking to beam up her long-lost alien brethren, making sure to get low in the squat. Some women may find it useful to support their upper body by propping their hands or forearms on their knees. Once properly positioned go ahead and let loose the stream.

First and foremost, you must have the proper stance. I cannot stress enough the importance of a deep squat. Many have fallen victim to the lazy-woman's stance, which is commonly employed when one doesn't feel like exerting the proper muscles and ends up with more of a tilt than a squat. What usually happens is that said Hover-Pisser either ends up getting piss on herself, on her underwear or worse, her clothes.

Which leads to my second precaution.

It is entirely important to make sure that your pants, shorts, whatever it is that you may be wearing while effecting the Hover-Piss stance, are lowered to about knee level. Otherwise, you might end up with a large wet spot on yourgarments.

Once you are positioned in the correct Hover-Piss stance, your clothes adequately lowered, go ahead and rest your forearms on your thighs, and use the hand of your choice to pull your underwear away from the toilet seat. Underwear has a sneaky way of getting into your stream, so don't let it outwit you. Tuck it away and not only will you prevent urinating on it, you will also prevent it from making contact with the nasty, exposed part of the toilet bowl located between the gap in the toilet seat.

here's a bonus of a woman peeing regularly

http://www.morphizm.com/images/observations/fu/jennypee.jpg'>

Drunken Hover-Pissing

Now, one would think after having all the basics covered, you could go out into the world, ready to Hover-Piss with the best of them.

Wrong.

There is still more you should know and special circumstances to consider.

For instance, after a few too many cocktails, awareness, coordination and basically common sense fly out the window, which is why it is so very important to take a moment and collect your wits before you enter a public restroom.

Envision the scenario. Legally drunk woman enters bathroom, wobbling and giggling, crossing her legs, shifting her hips back and forth, doing the dance as she waits for a stall to open up. When it is finally her turn, she rushes into the stall and hikes up her skirt.

Stop.

There are three ways she can ward off screwing up this Hover-Piss situation. Can you guess what they may be?

Two of them have already been covered. First, she must make sure to squat deep enough so she doesn't piss on herself. Second, she must be aware enough to tuck in her underwear to avoid both her own urine and the nasty toilet.

The third is a tough one and I'm glad to pass on this knowledge before you encounter this dilemma yourself. As a drunk woman who is amused and entertained by, oh, so many things, do not be tempted to duck your head down and watch your lovely yellow stream of piss. Sure, it might seem interesting at the time, but let me guarantee you that an inebriated woman trying to watch her own piss will definitely keel over and crash head first into the stall door. This situation can prove both messy and embarrassing. Don't attempt it.

Another special situation to consider is when you are on your period and are utilizing the absorbing benefits of a tampon. One would think: urethra, vaginal opening, two different holes, no problem, right? Wrong again. Let me tell you, it is definitely a problem. The placement of a tampon may press into the urethra, blocking the direct flow of urine. Pee mayl spray every which way but in the toilet if one attempts to Hover-Piss with a tampon inserted.

Now, the odds are that you will eventually need to hover-piss with a tampon in, so let me pass on this advice. It is crucial to get into a very deep squat if you encounter this situation. A stance so deep that you are almost touching the toilet. This will really test the strength of your quads and glutes. Think of it as an extra workout. Do whatever necessary to get in such a position. Just get as close to the toilet seat as possible without actually touching it. It is the only way to prevent pissing on everything in the immediate vicinity.

Now if you're drunk and on your period, well, forget it. I have no advice for you, except to maybe sit on your hands and hope for the best.

Just make sure to disinfect them afterwards.

:lol: yes!!!

Originally posted by Telo

thats probably the fastest ive ever seen a girl take off her under pants.

you should see what happens when you light them on fire