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Police: Man's Testicles Locked In Padlock

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by KING BLING, Aug 11, 2005.


    KING BLING Guest


    Police: Man's Testicles Locked In PadlockMan Could Not Remove Lock For Two Weeks

    POSTED: 3:39 pm EDT August 5, 2005
    UPDATED: 10:42 am EDT August 6, 2005

    BRENTWOOD, N.H. -- Emergency workers helped a Brentwood man out of a difficult situation over the weekend after a friend apparently locked a padlock around his testicles.

    According to the Portsmouth Herald, police reported that the 39-year-old man was intoxicated when they arrived at the scene on July 30 at about 3:40 a.m. The man, who was not identified, told them that he had the padlock around his testicles for two weeks.

    The man said that a friend put the lock on while he was drunk and passed out. When he woke up, the friend was gone.

    "Never in my 13 years have I seen anything like this," Cpl. H.D. Wood told the Herald.

    The man told police that he tried to remove the lock with a hacksaw because the key had broken off in the lock.

    He was taken to Exeter Hospital, where a locksmith removed the padlock. He was treated and released, and the hospital said he had no lasting injury.

    Police said that they did not know the motive for the incident.
  2. Abracadabra

    Abracadabra Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Dec 28, 2001 Messages: 22,906 Likes Received: 113
    for $30 a locksmith would get that thing off with 0% damage to your testes.

    anyhoo, i'll have to do that to someone next time i'm drunk.
  3. WhiteOx

    WhiteOx Elite Member

    Joined: Sep 4, 2003 Messages: 3,691 Likes Received: 0
    A photo of the the freak would really complement this thread
  4. High Priest

    High Priest Elite Member

    Joined: Jan 1, 2002 Messages: 4,928 Likes Received: 4

    24. Stealth Masturbation: 

    Now this might be kind of hard but it. Grease your hair. (really) Works best with long hair. and yes the hair on your head. Then bend down REALLY FAR. Stick your cock in your hair put on some rock music and head bang. This is the MAXIMUM PLEASURE EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!
  5. xen

    xen Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Oct 4, 2004 Messages: 2,804 Likes Received: 304
    I mighta just left it there and hit the freakshow circuit down south. Charged 2 bits a gander :haha: :haha: :haha:
  6. Dick Quickwood

    Dick Quickwood 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Aug 25, 2002 Messages: 14,783 Likes Received: 14
  7. El Mikinbin De Miami

    El Mikinbin De Miami Member

    Joined: Dec 7, 2004 Messages: 585 Likes Received: 0
    heh. Your gonna touch somebody's balls?
  8. kasmoney

    kasmoney Guest

    cold water that thing would have fell off...
  9. dumy

    dumy Veteran Member

    Joined: Oct 8, 2004 Messages: 5,056 Likes Received: 0
  10. fatalist

    fatalist Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Mar 10, 2004 Messages: 6,354 Likes Received: 25
    i voted for option 5.

    carry on!
  11. fatalist

    fatalist Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Mar 10, 2004 Messages: 6,354 Likes Received: 25
  12. nomadawhat

    nomadawhat Veteran Member

    Joined: Aug 24, 2001 Messages: 5,001 Likes Received: 2
    wouldn't that give you a massive stomach ache for two weeks? just having that lock pulling you down.. fuck.

    its pretty funny though...

    maybe make the guy swallow the key also.. then he would have to recover it to free himself....
  13. ODS-1

    ODS-1 Elite Member

    Joined: Jul 21, 2003 Messages: 3,575 Likes Received: 0
    I wouldn't stick my dick in a padlock in the first place.
  14. DETO

    DETO Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Apr 25, 2002 Messages: 11,348 Likes Received: 155
    Boogie Hands!
  15. Abracadabra

    Abracadabra Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Dec 28, 2001 Messages: 22,906 Likes Received: 113
    heh. Your gonna touch somebody's balls?
    [post=4069194]Quoted post[/post]​

    $30 for 2 minutes of discomfort? why not