Mr. Mang Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 rants & raves > "tacky" sand box revenge Date: 2005-01-24, 11:34PM PST Dearest neighbors. I want you to know that it was me, yes me. I am the guilty one. Or am I? Perhaps it is your fault. You are the ones who let your children scream, run, prances and utterly torment me with their hi pitched screams of fun. I could only find one solution to the horrific noise pollution that rose from that ghastly feline defecated sand box you let your offspring play in. Since you wont quiet down I was forced to shut down the sand box. 3 packages of thumb tacks seemed to do the trick. I laughed aloud when I heard the cry of the first “owies”. I giggled when I saw you parents trying to comb the sand to remove the tacks. 200 tacks come in a box, I tossed 3 boxes into the sand. You will never get them all. If you do I will just steal more from work and do it again. I finally have silence. Perhaps toxic chemicals in the sand will be my next choice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trackstand Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 HAHAHA HA JESUS CHRIST. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jackson Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 HAHAA pure genius. Fucking quality. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rodney Trotter Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 LOLS ROFL HA HA! Quite funny actually. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 I just bought 120+ divx movie rips from craigslist. a birthday gift to me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oneeightyone Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 haha, that's fucking hilarious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fatalist Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 I DON'T FIND THE HUMOR IN IT, guess cause i'm too much of a nice person. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nomadawhat Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 You made me VOMIT in my mouth. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reply to: anon-56988576@craigslist.org Date: 2005-01-24, 11:40PM PST You are the lowest form of life. You stupid fuck. Do not fucking call me to wish me a happy goddamn birthday after you dump me months ago. The sound of your nasally voice actually made me vomit. Not quite projectile vomit, no more like just vomit in my mouth. No, I do NOT want to have a “birthday dinner” with you. I’d actually rather eat my dog’s shit than hang out with your lame ass again. I bet you thought asking me to dinner was a really a nice gesture, huh? Just like I’m sure you intended nothing but the best for me when you dumped me 4 DAYS before my GMAT! That’s right, 4 fucking days before my GMAT! Thanks for nothing you insensitive dipwad. I hope your dick shrivels up and is rendered useless. I feel sorry for your offspring already. Thanks to you I threw up a perfectly good pepperoni hot pocket. my missed connection: my morning hot pocket Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 Dear Wigger, As a fan of rap music, I need to ask you to slow your roll. Ease up right thurr. Stop with the idiot grilling. Cease and desist. In other words, cease living. It's because of you that when I walk up to purchase music at a store I'm sure the clerk is thinking to themselves, 'look at this wigger not buying the latest Nickelback album', even though I am exhibiting none of the usual outward attributes that stereotypical wiggers possess. It's because of you that I can no longer wear a ballcap backwards for fear of being slotted in with you. It's because of you that there is no doubt a large shortage of wavecaps in this world, even though you HAVE NO WAVES. It's because of you that the pinwheel hat industry is now set for the next hundred years, during which time they will no doubt introduce something even more hideous than the pinwheel cap. It's because of you that I am leery of saying that I listen to hip hop to my fellow co-workers. It's because of you that De La Soul is not 'applicable to the audience of BET' and cannot have their videos on air anymore. It's because of you that I can't buy a decent pair of baggy jeans or a shirt without having some shitty comic graphic taking up half the space on the ass and/or chest pocket area. Really. All of you should give up. Just shut the fuck up, go home, burn all your music and your assorted parephenalia associated with said music, and take up something else. Euchre. Maybe gambling. But don't fuck around with my music anymore. - I think it's seeking undercover! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fatalist Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 Originally posted by nomadawhat@Jan 25 2005, 05:56 PM You made me VOMIT in my mouth. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reply to: anon-56988576@craigslist.org Date: 2005-01-24, 11:40PM PST You are the lowest form of life. You stupid fuck. Do not fucking call me to wish me a happy goddamn birthday after you dump me months ago. The sound of your nasally voice actually made me vomit. Not quite projectile vomit, no more like just vomit in my mouth. No, I do NOT want to have a “birthday dinner” with you. I’d actually rather eat my dog’s shit than hang out with your lame ass again. I bet you thought asking me to dinner was a really a nice gesture, huh? Just like I’m sure you intended nothing but the best for me when you dumped me 4 DAYS before my GMAT! That’s right, 4 fucking days before my GMAT! Thanks for nothing you insensitive dipwad. I hope your dick shrivels up and is rendered useless. I feel sorry for your offspring already. Thanks to you I threw up a perfectly good pepperoni hot pocket. my missed connection: my morning hot pocket Quoted post hahaha, NOW THIS SHIT HERE IS GOLDEN. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nomadawhat Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 http://losangeles.craigslist.org/mis/56987540.html -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reply to: anon-56987540@craigslist.org Date: 2005-01-24, 11:18PM PST you were grunting and groaning something awful, mumbling about a 'breached birth' while next to me this afternoon in the restroom stall right above the pet store and I was very close to calling the paramedics. by the time you were finished, Im sure you had squeezed out a baby seal. You winked at me in the mirror and wiped the sweat off your brow and said, 'its the shit,' and then you went back to shopping, without washing your hands. its a number 2 I'll just never forget. this is in or around weho it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferris Bueller Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 I couldn't help but laugh at this one ^^ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nomadawhat Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 ^^wait a minute.... it must of been iquit and his sunflowere seeds!! :idea: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smokejuda Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/about/b...c/56471618.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nomadawhat Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 what a catch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GnomeToys Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 "CARPENTER WANTS TO ERECT IT FOR HER" - 37 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Reply to: anon-56816623@craigslist.org Date: 2005-01-23, 9:55PM EST A carpenter seeks to erect her clit, so if you have something that needs a craftsman's eye for detail or that needs a hands on approach........ my pnumatic nail gun uses the largest nail size for added strength. Size does matter, when penetrating through and when thoroughness is saught, and for the tightest body connection to be made. My large hands can hold the butt end tight when nailing it in place. Large hands and feet will give you assured balance and accuracy. Contact George Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GnomeToys Posted January 25, 2005 Share Posted January 25, 2005 HAHAH Reply to: anon-52331544@craigslist.org Date: 2004-12-14, 2:31PM EST As with most of the other ladies on this site, I am an overweight male who sits around acting as though I am a single woman in need of a man to somehow protect me and be my something-something. this all being done to drag you into some sort of conversation at which point I will give you a random 8-digit phone number and tell you to call or check me out on my web site as my email account for some reason is not working. So, to save both of us the effort and eventual disappointment, how about you just send me your personal information and I'll locate some pictures of some girl, slap the words "Indy" into the picture name (like indygirl4u.jpg or something) to localize the thing. You can then show a few of your friends the hot chick you are talking with and when you never meet her, you will get a letter saying she always thought of you after she moved to canada to live in an arranged marriage that she could not get out of. So, feel free to send some wicked CC info... it'll be easier ;) much love ------ And if you stupid guys email me because it says "W4M" in the title, I'll use your email addy to sign you up for 17 porn email lists... You have been warned. SMARTEN UP PEOPLE! Am the only one who flags these stupid things??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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