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most awkward farts

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by mopius, Sep 18, 2001.

  1. mopius

    mopius Guest

    with a girl making out-that was no good
    out to dinner with parents-never went back there again...
    im sure you have them, when morning comes i will have thought of more i know it!!
  2. inkjunkie34

    inkjunkie34 Senior Member

    Joined: Jun 9, 2001 Messages: 1,614 Likes Received: 0
    a little squeaker in jail after getting caught, i feared for the safety of my asshole hymen...1st

    ya like dages...oh! dogs!
  3. inkjunkie34

    inkjunkie34 Senior Member

    Joined: Jun 9, 2001 Messages: 1,614 Likes Received: 0
    oh yea...one time i grabbed my girlfriend and she let out a mammoth of a fart, i mean like a norm from cheers fart

    ya like dages...oh! dogs!
  4. fr8lover

    fr8lover Guest

    early last year, i was in a big auditorium taking the act test. i had gas from drinking the night before but i did my best to make them as silent as possible. i dropped my pencil and when bent down to pick it up, i dropped the loudest involuntary fart ive ever heard and it was heard all accross the auditorium of at least 100 kids. for some reason though not everyone knew it was me and when we were taking a break my friend said, "hey did you guys hear some dude FART in there?" i just kind siddled away with a weird look on my face.

    doing situps in middle school gym was always a war against your anus to not fart, i let a few fly accidentally though. the girls were on the other side of the gym, man! you gotta keep that shit down!!!
  5. When

    When 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: May 4, 2000 Messages: 10,294 Likes Received: 3
    ha ha that shit has happened to me to i went to grab her to hug her or kiss her or somethin and BOOM! what the hell man? i still like to think that girls dont fart though
  6. -Rage-

    -Rage- 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Apr 12, 2001 Messages: 11,276 Likes Received: 70
    "I farted once on the set of Blue Lagoon"
  7. OGBforMumia

    OGBforMumia Member

    Joined: Sep 23, 2000 Messages: 710 Likes Received: 0
    this one wasnt awkward, but halarious; i went to school and everything was fine and dandy. when i hit second period then my stomach started growlin. and i had to fart so i let some go with no noise...no smell...bomb. then i get into the hallway for lunch with people around me. and let a silent one out. but the bastard was one of those hot farts that you know is gonna smell real fuckin bad. and i just broke out. while people behind me caught in the aftermath was like "goddamn yo, you do that shit" and started pickin on some kid...good times.

    and i let one rip while doin pull ups in gym class. but all the guys started laughin and was like "yo i dont want to go. i cant top that"
  8. my mom buys my clothes

    my mom buys my clothes Member

    Joined: May 30, 2001 Messages: 318 Likes Received: 0
    one time in history class my teacher had just finished yelling and she was sittin there with this stern look on her face and it was silent, but then you heard this long, quite, "pooooooooooooooot" sound come outta her. her face got all scrunched up and she just stood there, then started talking again.
  9. my mom buys my clothes

    my mom buys my clothes Member

    Joined: May 30, 2001 Messages: 318 Likes Received: 0
    that story would have been much better if i hadnt just made it up, im such an asshole
  10. nemersion

    nemersion Junior Member

    Joined: May 10, 2000 Messages: 187 Likes Received: 0

    not a fart story, but related nonetheless.
    im sittin in taco del mar hangin w/ my homies, an this hot chick is sittin out in her car, shes lookin like shes checkin out my friend whos working. so she sits there for awhile, an she finally gets up an heads towards the back. she was back there for awhile, and there were a bunch of new kids workin that day so i assumed she was one of them, an had gone to the backroom for prep. but then i see her come out from the back like 10 minutes later, an im like...ok? then my friend gets up to refill his drink from the fountain, which is right by the bathroom, an i guess she dropped a major bomb. no one else had gone back there, and the whole back area stunk like shit. my friend an i couldnt stop laughing, the whole time she was just standing around. i dont think she ever even ordered anyhting fuck that story sucked, you had to have been there. girls dont poop, let alone drop a stinky shit like that......
  11. mudpuddle

    mudpuddle Junior Member

    Joined: Jul 15, 2001 Messages: 130 Likes Received: 0
    first time meeting a girl.
    my friend and his girl decide to hook me up with this friend of hers.
    dinner. they're vegans, so big salads were involved.
    later, stomach is growling a little bit...
    no prob, fighting it... we start playing some board game, like monopoly or something, laying on the ground...

    i go to reach for the next card, and accidentally >>>>>> squuueeeeek.

    damn, excuse me...
    no problems, no funny looks, cool chicks...

    then the smell comes.... stale.

    my date suggests we go check out the garden.... LOL too cool.
    never talked to her again though. still embarassing to me, but my friend doesn't even remember.

    you annoy me more than a one legged guy with a soccer ball.
    in your head like gray matter.
  12. kined

    kined New Jack

    Joined: May 7, 2001 Messages: 8 Likes Received: 0
    when my girlfriend at the time was sittin on my face. she musta be relaxed... coincidentally it was the first fart of the relationship and she got really embarassed. farting has got to be transition from dating to having a relationship with someone. once you let that first one slide and she sticks around, your in it for the long haul.
  13. Fox Mulder

    Fox Mulder 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Nov 23, 2000 Messages: 12,434 Likes Received: 86
    i have a story similar to "my mom buys my clothes" but mine is true.

    my teacher was in mid sentence and she ripped a really loud one. she stopped talking for about 3 seconds and everyone in the class busted out laughing. and then she kept on talking. like 5 minutes later she appologized and made some dumb excuse about how she was taking some medicine or shit.
  14. dBUSH

    dBUSH Guest

    I cut a fart in a cop car once- we rolled to the station with the windows down.