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Meet the family (and other assorted characters).

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by imported_El Mamerro, Apr 27, 2002.

  1. http://newcamp.net/hector/images/familia/braces.jpg'>

    Hi, it's me, El Mamerro, and that's me up there with the braces in 7th grade. I'd like to introduce you to my family.


    This is my father, back in the good ol' disco days. He was probably very stoned when this picture was taken, and wished to express it by grabbing his nuts and making his fellow mustachioed friends point at his groin. Ha ha! The picture is obviously funny because it involves nuts.


    This is my dad today. Moments before this picture was taken, my dad was smoking weed out of a pipe the dude next to him made from assorted pieces of bathroom sink plumbing.


    This is my dad passed out on the couch, around 9 years ago. Me and my brother decided to crack an egg over his head to get back at him for all the times he had woken us up drunk, with a boombox blaring, calling us pussies for going to bed so early. We were expecting him to wake up confused after the egg impact, but, uh, he didn't. He had a huge mess in his hair the next day.


    My dad again, with two of my friends. I really don't know what the hell is going on in this picture, but it sure looks dirty.


    This is my mom, old school style... check out the wallpaper. There is a big probability she was high on LIFE when this picture was taken.


    This is my mom holding a giant plastic phallus, which we have lovingly dubbed "Wilson", and whose origins are unknown. My dad stares at it with lust. This picture brings me to....
  2. Mr. Mang

    Mr. Mang Elite Member

    Joined: Feb 27, 2002 Messages: 2,901 Likes Received: 1
    hahaha! fantastic!!!!
  3. http://newcamp.net/hector/images/familia/manuwilson.jpg'>

    ... my little brother, offering Wilson to some lucky fellow. From the look of the fellow's pants, I would say that it's me, but I really don't remember my brother pointing plastic penises at me ever. He's pointed his real dick at me on a number of occasions, but never a fake one.


    Me and my little bro at his 7th birthday, looking like complete total retards. Check out the fade I'm rocking, and the absolutely pitiful cake. That day, I broke his arm.


    My little bro sporting the cast that resulted from the aforementioned day. There is also a dog in the picture. And some weird squiggly white thing on the bottom right.


    My little bro rocking the latest addition to the family, my dad's Yamaha V-Star. I've mentioned this bike before, mainly because it owns my soul.


    Me, my big brother, and some people, at Mardi Gras. As you can see, my brother is getting his weiner licked in some shady parking lot. Mardi Gras rocks four times and a half, and you should all go sometimes.


    An old girlfriend. She was hot. And judging by how terribly faggy I look in that picture, she had weird tastes. This brings me to....


    you are the wind beneath my wings....my parents were lame.
  5. greedy mars

    greedy mars Guest

    mammero;s family is the shit.. ill be macking my sons girlfriends when im a father.. they better be hot too.
  6. http://newcamp.net/hector/images/familia/vivykar.jpg'>

    ...this picture, which features my ex, my best friend, and one bling-ass Prowler. My best friend, who is awfully rich and whose dad owns a Chrysler dealership, let her borrow this car, the first Prowler in PR so she could pick me up in the airport. I received a standing applause from everyone who witnessed the event, and...


    ...please believe I rode that shit hard down this stretch, with "The Perfect Drug" by Nine Inch Nails blaring on the stereo. It was good. VERY good.


    This is my best friend again, with my other best friend, a male this time, who is forcing her to perform cunnilingus on a mannequin. We had found in a trash pile behind a clothing store, after getting drunk on cooking wine and deciding that going through trash bins was more fun than going to the dressy party we were originally planning.


    The mannequin has since been dressed up and set up in my back porch so that it looks like a real person. Trust me, there's nothing more hilarious than seeing a drunk friend go up to this mannequin at parties thinking they can start up a conversation, only to end up screaming in fear and confusion.


    Seven years after we cracked an egg over my dad's head, my friend (who happens to be the same guy in the pic with my dad) passes out on the same couch in a very unfashionable fashion. We decide to tag the fuck out of him with gold paint markers. We filled every square millimeter of skin in his ears. Then I pulled down my pants and softly applied my ass to his face. This resulted in a terrible mess for Mamerro, because all the gold paint smeared over my ass crack. Bad karma I guess.


    This is a picture of my current girlfriend. It's in here just in case she ever sees this thread, so she doesn't complain about me putting pictures of ex's online and calling them hot.
  7. http://newcamp.net/hector/images/familia/familia.jpg'>

    My completely drunken family would like to say goodbye now, but before we leave...


    Please, please, PLEASE believe I was rocking the [color=FF0000]N[/color]inja steez since kindergarten, so don't front like I'm out of the crew. Me and my bro looking cool for halloween. Beer,

    El Mamerro


    that and a few beers were the beginning of a beautiful evening...bravo.
  9. Pilau Hands

    Pilau Hands Guest

    It really looks like you know how to have a good time.

    Bravo Mams. Bravo.
  10. swif1

    swif1 Veteran Member

    Joined: Dec 13, 2001 Messages: 7,067 Likes Received: 29
    thumbs up for the post.

    imma be a dad like yours one day mammero.
  11. platapie

    platapie Guest

    dam mammero. this is the best thread in months. if your ever in the middle of the pacific you hit me up and i got you on the first copla rounds.

  12. TeaMVCali2

    TeaMVCali2 New Jack

    Joined: Sep 28, 2000 Messages: 0 Likes Received: 0
    that shits sick as fuck ... your families so cool damn man now i feel hella bad for having such a lame ass family
  13. Zack Morris

    Zack Morris Veteran Member

    Joined: Jun 23, 2001 Messages: 9,728 Likes Received: 4
    haha...great stuff. But now we are even for you not beating off after seeing me use a plate to cover my dick. Isaw your ass, your friends cock, your dads gut, and a fake cock....we're even.
  14. T.T Boy

    T.T Boy Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: May 18, 2001 Messages: 21,803 Likes Received: 41
    best thread ever. period.
  15. DEE38

    DEE38 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Apr 8, 2001 Messages: 11,128 Likes Received: 13
    fuck the osbournes, el mammeros family is great stuff....

    i am quite a bit dissapointed though because the jesus potato is no where in those flicks.... its fucking depressing when you think about it... please make me undepressed..... i think wilson and jaypee danced together in the moonlite a couple nites...

    p.s. as part of this ninja shinanigans, i would like to mate with a ninja and have kids that look just like you with the ninja get up.............. my womb is ready, who wants to spread some love?

    that fuckin picture is so adorable!!