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Life?

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by Fugazi, Apr 11, 2002.

  1. Fugazi

    Fugazi Senior Member

    Joined: Dec 17, 2001 Messages: 1,298 Likes Received: 1
    Have you ever sat down and really thought about life, and about your life? I do it all the time, and it makes me depressed. I'm soon to be 20, and it seems like the best is already behind me. I'll finish college (hopefully), marry (hopefully), get a job (hopefully), and then what is there? With a family and a job, I'll lost most "real" friendships, having little or no time to associate with friends outside the work place. It blows my mind to have my parents being in their mid 50's. I can't say things between us have been the best, but I can't imagine what life will be like when they're gone.
    Memories fade I suppose. For better? I'm not sure. As hard as the pain of losing a close friend or family member is, maybe it's a good pain. It lets us know that we had something real. But eventually the pain fades, and what are you left with? A few fond memories perhaps.
    No, I don't think about killing myself, I don't think that's the right answer for anyone. I don't want prozac or any anti-depressants. Is that any way to live? Taking a drug that hides your true emotions and feelings? It's like putting on a blind fold. Life is painful, but it's beautiful as well.
    Anyways, I just thought I'd share how I feel, see if anyone else can understand me. It feels like life goes so fast.
     
  2. When

    When 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: May 4, 2000 Messages: 10,294 Likes Received: 3
    just live life
    antidepressants only fuck you up worse
    suicide ran through my head more when i was on them
    life is definately fast
    im always trying to catch up
    i just live day to day now
    its the only logical solution i can think of
    i dont want to get married
    marriage will kill my soul
    ill save it for when im old and dont have much soul left for the bitch to steal
    live life and have fun because it will soon be over
     
  3. ODW

    ODW Member

    Joined: Dec 28, 2001 Messages: 462 Likes Received: 0
    life is great. but it is crazy to think about everything.
     
  4. vinyl junkie

    vinyl junkie Elite Member

    Joined: Jan 17, 2002 Messages: 4,725 Likes Received: 0
    i have more thoughts on this if yer interested, but at the moment: why get a job where you have to sacrifice yer life? at the moment i work at a place that i was at all the time anyway... get a job you enjoy, or atleast with people you enjoy... i can never understand why people get these jobs filing papers and typing and shit all day... yeah, it may promise financial security, but you spend years and years of your life doing something you really don't enjoy... get a job y0ou enjoy, and put your life before your work...
     
  5. Fugazi

    Fugazi Senior Member

    Joined: Dec 17, 2001 Messages: 1,298 Likes Received: 1
    Re: Re: Life?

    I definately agree with you on this. That's the main reason I'm going to college, is so I'll have the option to do what I want, and pursue my interests when I "step out" in the real world. Peace.
     
  6. When

    When 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: May 4, 2000 Messages: 10,294 Likes Received: 3
    indeedy! i have a job i love, and i know it will be around for a long time to come but if it isnt ...who cares?
    im not married i dont support anyone
    i live the way i want and i must tell you
    it is bliss
     
  7. Fugazi

    Fugazi Senior Member

    Joined: Dec 17, 2001 Messages: 1,298 Likes Received: 1
    Thanks for your feedback...

    I appreciate hearing everyone's thoughts and comments. I think my main problem is that I live in the past. I think I may need to see a counselor or something eventually. Sometimes I just sit back and think about when I was a kid... and like Christmas time with my parents and relatives. Times that will never again be. Nothing can bring them back. I had a dream a few weeks ago. I was at my old house where I haven't lived in years. My dad was in the backyard, god he looked so young, like I remember him when I was a kid, and he was smiling, like he was expecting me. I broke down in tears. He gave me a hug as I was crying and said to me, "It's alright, your mother and I are growing old, it's part of life." I don't know. I can't think about this shit anymore tonight. I'm going to sleep.
     
  8. Fugazi

    Fugazi Senior Member

    Joined: Dec 17, 2001 Messages: 1,298 Likes Received: 1
    I guess to sum it up: I'm not afraid of dying. But I'm terrified about losing those that I love.
     
  9. vinyl junkie

    vinyl junkie Elite Member

    Joined: Jan 17, 2002 Messages: 4,725 Likes Received: 0
    absolutely when... plus, you've got the added bonus of being in a job that you can keep doing until yer all old and decrepit...

    and fugazi- good move... i'm a little manic depressive, and the depression lasts much longer than the mania, so i totally understand what yer saying... i spent a lot of time worrying about what i would do for a living... there's the stuff i like to do, that's really unreliable as far as money goes, and there's the stuff i hate that will keep me rich forever... finally i had a friend who's a good deal older than me say: "fuck it... do what you like. we live in america, do you know how hard it is to starve here?" i've never worried about it since. even if i get old living in a tiny little apartment, eating 10 cent ramen, atleast i'll be happy... and as far as the food thing goes (it was kinda said as a joke...) after doing doing a little traveling, and a lot of couch-surfing, i know this is true too...
    :)
     
  10. vinyl junkie

    vinyl junkie Elite Member

    Joined: Jan 17, 2002 Messages: 4,725 Likes Received: 0
    didn't see yer post under when, fugazi... i had never had anyone i really knew die until a few years ago, then in the last year or two i've had about 15 friends and family die... it sucked, but you learn to deal... really...
     
  11. When

    When 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: May 4, 2000 Messages: 10,294 Likes Received: 3
    death isnt a pretty picture but hey whata ya gonna do?
    its a part of life everyone does sooner or later
    ive had a few friends die due to suicide or other things
    and for the time it was sad but if you dwell on it it just makes things worse

    and trust me vinyljunkie i will be doing my job i do right now until i die or get all my limbs cut off in a freak accident
     
  12. unoprimero

    unoprimero Guest

  13. A Fire Inside

    A Fire Inside Senior Member

    Joined: Sep 5, 2001 Messages: 1,836 Likes Received: 0
    I think my main problem is that I live in the past. [/QUOTE]

    I can feel where you're coming from... Life does go by way too fast, and it get's difficult to enjoy it when job's and the such get in the way.


    I used to live in the past a lot, and I still do (not as much now though..i guess.) Anyways, I was thinking just the other day how "good" my life was. I work, when I'm not working I'm painting, and when I'm not painting I'm usually with a good friend. Of course at all time's, things COULD be better, but I'm not one to complain about my situation, because I know I have it good. It's a nice routine I've fallen into the past couple months.

    My Mother keeps bringing up college and getting a job that will lead somewhere instead of my dead end job. I'm not a fan of change, or new situations, so I suppose that's my main reason for not going to college yet (if ever.) I think I'm straying away from the subject so I'll stop...
     
  14. Tofu

    Tofu Senior Member

    Joined: Sep 23, 2000 Messages: 1,230 Likes Received: 0
    You need to give your heart to Jesus. If you do, when you leave this world you will be rewarded with eternal paradise with him in Heaven.

    Riiiiiiiiiiight. :rolleyes:
     
  15. Stoney Blaze

    Stoney Blaze Guest

    As an atheist I can relate to the philosophy of Christ through reason rather than a religious aspect.
    Ultimately the practice of such philosophy becomes religious, which makes me rethink my position on the existance of a supreme reason or God.
    If you read the book thouroughly, you'll find that Christ's main intent was to create heaven on earth so you will not be left unsatisfied or traumatized during life or death. It's a highly intelligent excersize in psychology which considers the truth of our mortality.

    The 'Bagavad Gita' states:
    70)A person who is not disturbed by the incessant flow of desires can alone acheive peace, and not the man who strives to satisfy such desires.
    71) A person who has given up all desires for sense gratification, who lives free from desires, who has given up all sense of proprietership and is devoid of the false ego--he alone can attain real peace.

    To sum it up... Boredom IS peace. Enjoy it and create something positive to eleviate it.
     
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