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its like vivaldis spring outside...ROB

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by mental invalid, Mar 26, 2004.

  1. mental invalid

    mental invalid Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: May 11, 2001 Messages: 13,050 Likes Received: 8
    take your shoes and socks off and relax......

    Free Will Astrology
    horoscopes for week of March 25, 2004

    Aries (March 21-April 19)

    For months now, you've been cultivating a more mature relationship with obstacles. You've begun to see them less as punishments doled out by an unfair universe and more as interesting, growth-inducing challenges provided by a generous universe. If you do nothing else but master this perspective in the next eight months, I'll declare 2004 a success. Are you ready for the next big breakthrough in your noble struggle to refine how you struggle?

    Taurus (April 20-May 20)

    "Bolivia has no ocean, but it has admirals done up like Lord Nelson," writes Eduardo Galeano in The Book of Embraces. "Lima, Peru has no rain, but it has peaked roofs with gutters. In Managua, Nicaragua, one of the hottest cities in the world, there are mansions flaunting magnificent fireplaces." Are there any anomalies like these in your world, Taurus? Do you have tools for jobs you never do? Luxuries you don't use? Elaborate structures that have no purpose? If so, it's time to either rethink your relationship to them or else phase them out.

    Gemini (May 21-June 20)

    You will soon come across numerous clues about the Great Riddle of Your Life -- you know, the brain-teasing, heart-stretching enigma that will take years for you to solve completely. So be alert! Revelations may arrive from unexpected sources and inadvertent teachers. Even seemingly insignificant events may be pregnant with pithy hints. To cultivate the right kind of receptivity, be on the lookout not only for crisp answers, but also for ideas about how to formulate the Great Riddle more clearly. P.S.: Keep an image of a sphinx near you at all times. It'll help supercharge your intuition.

    Cancer (June 21-July 22)

    Your trust was violated in the past, and you still feel the wound. You keep it in the background of your awareness, fascinated with the way it never really heals. Though I sympathize, I want you to know that it's time to move on. Your horrified disbelief about having been treated so badly is close to becoming just another bad habit. Your instinct for self-protection is threatening to devolve into indulgent self-pity. What should you do? The first thing is to forgive yourself for the blindness that put you in the path of those who betrayed you. The second step is to restore your trust in yourself. Third, find a way to feel gratitude for those who abused your trust. Yes, you heard me right: Be thankful for all they taught you about how to become yourself.

    Leo (July 23-August 22)

    When he first invented the printing press in the fifteenth century, Johannes Gutenberg used it to fashion frivolous little things like sets of playing cards. Only later did he put it to work mass-producing books, turning it into a revolutionary tool for disseminating information. I foresee a similar evolution for you in the coming weeks, Leo. In the early going, you'll employ a wonderful new resource in a relatively impractical way; or maybe a big, fresh idea will first appear in a trivial context. Not to worry, though. After the initial false starts and wasteful experiments, you will ultimately discover an elegant use for your innovation. Be patient.

    Virgo (August 23-September 22)

    If you're willing, life will soon offer you not just a fleeting glimpse but a penetrating gaze at what has been concealed beneath the surface. You'll be invited to shed your preconceptions and come face-to-face with hidden agendas, missing links, and fertile secrets. If you'd rather not accept life's overture to strip away pretenses, please forget you ever read this horoscope. To retain it in your memory would interfere with your enjoyment of the pretty packaging that veils the slightly disturbing, totally invigorating contents inside.

    Libra (September 23-October 22)

    Just as I have little patience for people who perpetuate ethnic stereotypes, I also cringe at astrologers who assume that all Libras are unflappably gracious, obsessed with relationships, and unable to make up their minds. While there is a grain of truth in those characterizations, they're oppressive if regarded as immutable cosmic law. You need the freedom to complain now and then, especially when a situation has become so filled with deception and illusion that it's hurting people. To remain unflappably gracious in the face of a mess like that would be wrong. Likewise, on occasion you need to forget what's best for a relationship and instead concentrate on what's best for you. This is one of those times, Libra, when you have license to rebel against astrology's stereotypes.

    Scorpio (October 23-November 21)

    An image of the Virgin Mary materialized on the window of a home in Ohio. That, at least, is what an imaginative neighbor believed, though the occupants themselves were apathetic. But the neighbor spread the word, and soon pilgrims were coming from afar to be in the presence of the miracle. A blind woman regained her sight; a man in a wheelchair walked for the first time in eight years; a six-year-old child with life-threatening asthma breathed freely again. Then the maid came. It was her regular day to work. The homeowners neglected to tell her not to clean the special window, and she did. The blessed image disappeared and the crowd dispersed. Moral of the story, Scorpio: The magic that comes your way this week might be a bit messy -- indeed, it might even rise out of a mess. Don't clean it up.

    Sagittarius (November 22-December 21)

    Evangelical Christian TV personality Pat Robertson says God told him that George W. Bush will win the U.S. presidential election in a landslide. That's odd, because God told me the exact opposite: Bush will be out of office and sitting on the board of Halliburton by February, 2005. To my knowledge, Robertson has not yet commented on the upcoming binge of intelligent fun and righteous pleasure that astrologers are predicting for you Sagittarians. My guess, though, is that *his* God wouldn't approve. My God, on the other hand, predicts that you will generate good karma as you have a sweet, boisterous time.

    Capricorn (December 22-January 19)

    An entrepreneur approached me with a proposal. "Your work should be getting out to a bigger audience. The masses are starving for the message you're putting out. That's why you need me. With my marketing machine, your name could become as recognizable as Deepak Chopra's. Let's build an entertainment conglomerate and hawk a hundred Rob Brezsny-style products." "Nah," I said. "People come to me seeking sanctuary from hype. They know I won't smack them upside the head with relentless sales pitches." I urge you to adopt a similar attitude in the coming week, Capricorn. Let everyone relax in your presence, knowing they won't be hustled, cajoled, or manipulated.

    Aquarius (January 20- February 18)

    The Golden Rule is a decent ethical principle, but it could be even better. "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" presumes that others like what you like. But that's laughably naive and potentially a big mistake. There are many things you would like to have done unto you that others would either despise or be bored by. Here's a new, improved formulation, which we'll call the Platinum Rule: Do unto others as they would like to have you do unto them. Of course these are always powerful words to live by, Aquarius, but especially now. It's time to take your integrity to the next level.

    Pisces (February 19-March 20)

    Contrary to the assumptions of misinformed "skeptics," real astrology has nothing to do with the stars, except for one star: our sun. The 12 signs of the zodiac don't correspond to constellations, but demarcate symbolic phases of the cyclic relationship between the sun and Earth. Here's another correction of one of the skeptics' many misunderstandings: Astrology is an art, not a science. While it does have a logical coherency and can be of great use in understanding the mystery of our lives, it's not a precise body of facts based on repeatable experiments. It's a mythic language that trains our imaginations to be aware of the links between our inner world and the outer world. Now, Pisces, take inspiration from my words as you fight back against those who judge and criticize you even though they don't understand you.
  2. DETO

    DETO Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Apr 25, 2002 Messages: 11,350 Likes Received: 154
    deto/patiently waiting to blow!

    • homoblock activated!
  3. <KEY3>

    <KEY3> Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 24, 2004 Messages: 6,878 Likes Received: 2
    this time... I mean it !!!

    Aries: (March 21—April 19)
    Both your mind and a locomotive run on rails, are difficult to maintain, and make chugging noises, but after that, the analogy starts to break down.

    Taurus: (April. 20—May 20)
    You were right about the existence of a 10th planet, but don't be smug: Your claims about a race of cat-women who thirst for your seed was way off.

    Gemini: (May 21—June 21)
    Mark Twain said moving house twice equals one house fire, so it looks like Fate owes you a couple house moves.

    Cancer: (June 22—July 22)
    Arguments over the relative merits of football and soccer are rendered moot next week, when aliens challenge us to a bizarre hybrid of both games with the fate of the earth at stake.

    Leo: (July 23—Aug. 22)
    The surgeons are unclear on exactly why you need a titanium plate implanted in your ass, but hey... gift horses.

    Virgo: (Aug. 23—Sept. 22)
    A fateful chess match with Death looms in your future, so you might want to replace that tacky Star Trek chess set.

    Libra: (Sept. 23—Oct. 23)
    It won't really do you any good, but it's very stirring nonetheless when you remember the Alamo, the Maine, and Pearl Harbor during your audit.

    Scorpio: (Oct. 24—Nov. 21)
    The principle of entropy says that all systems tend toward disorder, so just think of what happens to your legs next week as a natural, universal constant.

    Sagittarius: (Nov. 22—Dec. 21)
    You're tired of all these narrow escapes with your life, so next week's gas-truck accident will be sort of a relief.

    Capricorn: (Dec. 22—Jan. 19)
    It's often a mistake to try and make learning fun, as you'll prove next week during your combined fireworks-safety/defensive-driving demonstration.

    Aquarius: (Jan. 20—Feb. 18)
    You may think your life is due for big changes, but the unknowable cosmic forces in control of your fate don't.

    Pisces: (Feb. 19—March 20)
    An important warning sticker will be missing this week. The stars can't tell you where it should be, but it should say "Caution: Rotating Knives."
  4. yoink

    yoink Elite Member

    Joined: May 27, 2002 Messages: 3,428 Likes Received: 0

    why not! just got back from the skatepark, its a nice ass sunny day out, gonna go get a coffee..friday has started right.
  5. gfreshsushi

    gfreshsushi Senior Member

    Joined: Sep 21, 2003 Messages: 2,244 Likes Received: 1


    i don't even know what this means.
  6. WebsterUno

    WebsterUno Guest


    I dont give a hoot what Rodney thinks about metaphysics...

    my shits totally on point this week...and last...and 2 weeks
    before that....

    *believe*, rodney...*believe*!! :lick:
  7. Weapon X

    Weapon X 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Sep 6, 2002 Messages: 14,905 Likes Received: 202
    That’s friggin’ nuts. I was playing 4 Seasons Spring on violin just a couple of hours ago down the street from me.
  8. SteveAustin

    SteveAustin Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 12, 2002 Messages: 7,042 Likes Received: 2
    great...I'm a rebel with an audit.

    last weeks mission was just bad...like whiskey.
  9. Poop Man Bob

    Poop Man Bob Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Nov 16, 2000 Messages: 10,259 Likes Received: 18
    I like mine a lot.
  10. Telo

    Telo Elite Member

    Joined: Jun 3, 2003 Messages: 4,164 Likes Received: 37
    vivaldis fall :mexican:
  11. TEARZ

    TEARZ Guest

    i've had a tough week yo... but today, i played "bombardment" (you know, super dodge ball where you whip 4-square balls at little kids and it makes that satisfying ping sound when it hits them) and everything is all good again. except my arm hurts.
  12. -J.Handsome-

    -J.Handsome- Member

    Joined: Mar 24, 2004 Messages: 270 Likes Received: 0
  13. afraidoflife

    afraidoflife Member

    Joined: Apr 13, 2003 Messages: 322 Likes Received: 0
    You better be right Rob...

    Hey Roe.. warm weather brings us togerther??
  14. rental

    rental Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Jul 1, 2001 Messages: 7,641 Likes Received: 2
    neither of mine really mad sense...
  15. mental invalid

    mental invalid Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: May 11, 2001 Messages: 13,050 Likes Received: 8

    hahahah....i taught at this elementary school for like 4 months, and played that shit everyday...i was ruff, and had to remind myself a few times to chill...great game

    i love that fact that you threw your arm out whipping headers at little kids...

    but ya know what, its a right of passage for em.

    when i was those kids age i loved it.