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I Got Attacked By A Girl 2 Nights Ago!

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by Weapon X, Oct 22, 2003.

  1. Weapon X

    Weapon X 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Sep 6, 2002 Messages: 14,905 Likes Received: 202
    I’m watching this show called Let’s Learn Japanese. It’s not working.

    Watashi wa Weapon X desu. Dozo yoroshiku.

    I’m supposed to dump this girl, but have been slacking on it. So she calls me to come out right around a couple of minutes after I get home. I say, “nah, I got a test tomorrow” and she say’s it’s cool, and that she’ll call me tomorrow. Then she calls me two minutes later, and says that “we need to talk for two seconds”. Excellent.

    She comes by with her friend and I approach the car which is parked on the street in front of my house. Her friend walks across the street to let us be alone. The girl dumps me, but I had smoked three huge spliffs, so I was all grinning and shit. I say that we should still be friends, and this girl is like “I’ll try but I need some time” type shit.

    So as I start walking back to my front door, I tell the girl’s friend “peace out”. She tells me to hold up; that she has something to say to me. I stop, she approaches (the two girls exchange words in Bulgarian) and then throws a mean right hook with two rings on her fist. I dodge it like I’m Peter Parker dodging Flash’s punches in the school scene in Spiderman. She starts kicking me and punching me in the back, but I was on the ball, ducking and dodging everything like I’m a kung-fu kid who doesn’t wanna fight. Then she throws some crazy ass karate kick that just narrowly misses my face. Woulda fucked up my grill for sure, which woulda sucked because I had court the next day. Anyway, I don’t get mad, just ask “what the fuck was that about”. The girl who dumped me has a smirk on her face and says “I swear I didn’t tell her to do that.”

    I swear, girls can’t stand it when they don’t break your heart. She knew she couldn’t get me to fall in love, so breaks it off. And when I was all high and grinning and shit, instead of begging for her back, she gets her friend to attack me. And while I’m still not mad, it’s eating them up inside.

    Either that, or Bulgarian chicks are crazy. :idea:
    KM4RT likes this.
  2. Telo

    Telo Elite Member

    Joined: Jun 3, 2003 Messages: 4,164 Likes Received: 37
    Fabulous!!.. good mind work man.. You are laying back telling it on 12oz while they are losing precious hours of sleep trying to think of ways to attack you.. wait.. she told me not to tell you that lat part..
  3. fatbastard

    fatbastard Elite Member

    Joined: Jun 30, 2002 Messages: 2,880 Likes Received: 11
    i got some satisfaction from that story, seriosuly i hate girls that attack guys and i know just the type of girl that attacker is as well (not very hot is she average/below average) the fact that you ducked the punches and the whole thing didnt bug you releived me, ive been in that situation, something similar.

    you go GUYfriend! :lol:
  4. king kong

    king kong Banned

    Joined: Jul 24, 2003 Messages: 2,292 Likes Received: 0
    get another girl you know to fight both of them
  5. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Veteran Member

    Joined: Jul 12, 2000 Messages: 6,979 Likes Received: 2
    that's wild!

    You should be studying Bulgarian instead of Japanese.
    That way when some chick says 'Ok killer, go get him'
    you know to start moving.
  6. Weapon X

    Weapon X 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Sep 6, 2002 Messages: 14,905 Likes Received: 202
    Actually, I’d say the attacker is pretty attractive. That’s the thing! Her and I got along real well. We’d buy beers for each other, she paid for my dinner once, and is very hilarious. I swear, she makes me laugh all the time. The attack was very much out of left field, but still, I knew the punch was coming.

    It’s the girl that dumped me that isn’t quite the best looking. Don’t get me wrong, she’s pretty, but nowhere near mint. I liked her mostly for her personality.

    Kilo, that won’t be necessary. I’m done with Bulgarians.
  7. kemekill

    kemekill Member

    Joined: Feb 6, 2003 Messages: 419 Likes Received: 0
    I woulda decked her.
  8. Gunm

    Gunm Banned

    Joined: Aug 31, 2003 Messages: 12,427 Likes Received: 2
    Excellent story. Yeah, you're kind of at a loss when a girl attacks you in public. Unless you're some animal that digs that stuff, hitting a girl will get you nothing but a bad rep. I mean, do you wanna be the guy known for giving Cindy a bloody nose?

    It's kinda cool having some chick slap at you. kinda like you're some bad boy heartbreaker or some such shit like that.

    I actually had a girl try to hit me once but my gf stepped up and kicked the hoes ass. It's great having a chick that can fight.
  9. Weapon X

    Weapon X 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Sep 6, 2002 Messages: 14,905 Likes Received: 202
    ^^ word to that, LENS. I have a female friend who is salivating at the thought of kicking these girls down. I don’t think I’m gonna do that, though. In this case, the nice guy isn’t finishing last.

    The worst part of the story is that some of my neighbours saw this. I live on a quiet street, and have lived here all my life. At that moment, I wasn’t in Kansas anymore.
  10. caL

    caL Senior Member

    Joined: Feb 7, 2003 Messages: 2,056 Likes Received: 0
  11. Weapon X

    Weapon X 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Sep 6, 2002 Messages: 14,905 Likes Received: 202
    Everyone – relate your stories about getting attacked by females! I’m sure there’s some very funny tales. And right now, I’m very emotionally fragile and need to be able to relate to someone.:lol:
  12. Dr. Dazzle

    Dr. Dazzle Veteran Member

    Joined: Nov 19, 2001 Messages: 8,147 Likes Received: 3
    Hahaha....great story. A friend of mine had the same thing happen with Russians. Must be an Eastern European thing......
  13. alure

    alure Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Oct 18, 2002 Messages: 4,700 Likes Received: 17
    haha.. enjoyed the story that shit was funny. crazy bitches. any girls would have done that to one of my boys i woulda beat the shit out of her, unless she was some huge burly he-she man then i would have brought a bat;]
  14. SteveAustin

    SteveAustin Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 12, 2002 Messages: 7,042 Likes Received: 2
    the funniest thing (at least for me) when a girl attacks you is the complete shock and disbelief you go through at first.

    I had a complete stranger (girl) go nuts on me in public. I accidentally bumped her table and didn't immediately turn around and apologize. So...like a half hour later or so...I'm looking around the bar and she gets all bitchy up in my face asking if I'm gonna apologize. I've got the standard wtf face going on and laughing because I think she's joking. Sadly, I honestly thought she was hitting on me at first. Anyway...I dismiss her, turnaround and go back to drinking with my homies. Several minutes later...I'm scanning the room looking for honies and she catches my eye. She starts right back into it...demanding I apologize. I'm like...look it was an accident...get over it. If you want me to get down on my hands and knees and beg for your forgiveness...its not gonna happen. She kept being all bitchy....so I said...hey, I'm being cool about this...I could be saying some of the shit my friends are saying...but I'm not. Wrong thing to say...this just pisses her off and makes her demand to know what they said. I told her it wasn't my business to repeat it, but she kept going, so I finally gave in and told her. I'm sitting there with this big ass grin on my face when I see her cock her arm back, ball her fist up and deliver her best fucking punch right inbetween my mouth and nose. I was in complete shock. I couldn't fucking believe she threw a punch at me. After what seemed like a couple of minutes...I got up and started walking towards her. I was so pissed it was funny. I calmly stated that I was going to fucking kill her. At this point it broke down into me walking after her as she scrambled around our table. I'm telling her I'm gonna kill her, my friends are screaming get the fuck out of here you crazy bitch...and her friends were already out the door.
  15. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Veteran Member

    Joined: Jul 12, 2000 Messages: 6,979 Likes Received: 2
    It just wouldn't be a SteveAustin story without that line in there.

    A crazu girl threw a punch at me once and I caught her hand,
    leaned to the side, and pulled her right though her punch and
    into some bushes. I figured that was the safest thing to do.
    But without a doubt... I cath shit from the girl I was with for
    what I did. Was I suppose to let her hit me? She didn't get hurt,
    just embarassed. Nothing wrong with that.