The Helacious Dr. Dazzle Posted October 19, 2001 Share Posted October 19, 2001 10. Keep telling the same person they have bad breath, even if they don't, and then punch them in the face. 9. Announce in a meeting that you have AIDS. After everone gives you the sympathy remarks, tell everyone that you were just kidding and tell them that they are all a bunch of fucking queers. 8. Before a meeting, fill your mouth with custard. Then during a meeting, put one finger in the air and make a noise like you're hocking up a loogie. Then spit the custard into a glass, hand it to the person sitting next to you and say "Beat that!". 7. Inform a male co-worker that he "wouldn't make a good hooker". Then piss in his coffee and tell him he needs a good ass-fucking. 6. Always walk around with a big smile on your face and one hand down your pants. 5. Answer every question asked to you with "Fuck if I know", then call the person a racial slur that doesn't even correspond with their actual race. 4. Brag about the fact that you own a gun, and keep playing with your nuts. Get them all sweaty, then walk around shaking everbody's hands. 3. Shit on the floor in your office and when someone comes in and sees it, tell them it's the fake plastic kind. When they try to pick it up, and realize that their hand is covered with shit, laugh and point at them and call them a fucking asshole. 2. Run down the hall with your dick out while pissing all over and yell "It won't stop, help me!". Then when it stops, look down and say "Oh". 1. Ask to borrow someone's pen. Take it to the bathroom and stick it up your ass. Take it back to the person you borrowed it from and ask them to smell it. When they tell you it smells bad, tell them "It should, I had it in my ass". Some funny assed shiiiit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poop Man Bob Posted October 19, 2001 Share Posted October 19, 2001 hahahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mental invalid Posted October 19, 2001 Share Posted October 19, 2001 .....no matter how many times i get forwarded this, it always kills me....r 5. Answer every question asked to you with "Fuck if I know", then call the person a racial slur that doesn't even correspond with their actual race. ...if only i had the balls to do some of these..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*see-phore* Posted October 19, 2001 Share Posted October 19, 2001 hohohohohohohoho! it gets funnier every million times i read it hohohoho! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Helacious Dr. Dazzle Posted October 20, 2001 Author Share Posted October 20, 2001 Ha ha ha !!!!! Werd, man, funny shit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
footsoldier Posted October 20, 2001 Share Posted October 20, 2001 i always thought it would be funny to light the xerox machine on fire. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eyeBddub Posted October 20, 2001 Share Posted October 20, 2001 Not as funny as taking a shit on the floor dude. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I_Love_Freights Posted October 20, 2001 Share Posted October 20, 2001 I cracked up laughing reading that stuff.. I think its some of the funniest shit i've ever heard!! Man oh man... Considering I used to work in an office building, I can just picture the responses that those uptight shitheads would have given me if I did something like that.. My god. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Handjob Posted October 20, 2001 Share Posted October 20, 2001 too rich, old chap... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Helacious Dr. Dazzle Posted October 21, 2001 Author Share Posted October 21, 2001 I want more people to read this, so I'm gonna keep bumping it...:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jesus of Nazareth Posted October 21, 2001 Share Posted October 21, 2001 Hahahahaha...I remember the first time this was posted on here. I forwarded it to the CEO and VP of my company :beat: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
backcountrywriter Posted October 21, 2001 Share Posted October 21, 2001 Dude shit on the xerox machine and than light it on fire... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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