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hey, that was MY bike (a rant by freightlover)

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by fr8lover, Nov 25, 2003.

  1. fr8lover

    fr8lover Elite Member

    Joined: Oct 22, 2000 Messages: 3,919 Likes Received: 1
    my trek had a flat tire for a large portion of the summer after i took it on a pretty wild trail at the beginning of my "hey its summer, time to exercise and get out more" phase. well that phase ended the second the tire popped, and my bike sat in the corner of my garage for quite awhile until just yesterday i thought to myself, "let me go get that tire fixed...i feel like biking again!"

    i go outside to grab the bike and lo and behold the fucking thing was gone. nothing else stolen from our garage by my bike, with a FLAT TIRE no less.

    needless to say, i got pretty pissed. im sure you all now want me to say something like, "hey, if the person really needed that bike i wouldve gladly have given it to them." FUCK THAT. that was MY BIKE, and no amount of begging from your broke ass would have made me give it to you. maybe thats why you stole it, you figured me for the asshole that i truly am. CONGRATS. i hope that bike leads you down a trail that ends up falling off a cliff, douchebag. i hope you rack your balls on that thing so many times you cant have any kids who will steal MY KID'S BIKE.

    I HOPE THAT BIKE EJECTS YOU ONTO THE PAVEMENT OF A RURAL ROAD AND MAKES YOU BREAK YOUR LEG. WITH NOBODY ELSE TO HELP YOU STOP THE PROFUSE AMOUNT OF BLOOD LEAVING YOUR BODY, YOU TAKE ONE LAST GLIMPSE AT MY BIKE AND REALIZE THAT IF YOU HADNT STOLEN IT, YOU WOULDNT BE DYING A SLOW AND PAINFUL DEATH.

    enjoy the fuggin bike!
     
  2. Vanity

    Vanity Veteran Member

    Joined: Apr 11, 2000 Messages: 7,673 Likes Received: 6
    bikes are crazy easy to rack... i have a flat tire.. im debating whether to pay for a new tire, or get a new bike for free ;)
     
  3. RubbeRBand

    RubbeRBand Member

    Joined: Oct 14, 2003 Messages: 525 Likes Received: 0
    yeah I had a bike stolen....

    never stole another person's bike, tempting as it might be-


    -okay, I replied to your thread, now you reply to mine.:) :idea:
     
  4. Irite0n5tuff

    Irite0n5tuff New Jack

    Joined: Oct 22, 2003 Messages: 50 Likes Received: 0
    :scowl:
     
  5. old*824

    old*824 Senior Member

    Joined: Jun 8, 2003 Messages: 1,362 Likes Received: 0
    i ride a good eighty miles on a 70;'s era schwin.....


    i read the bucket beater bike from a past era and cut off luxury cars in traffic.

    i have a real bright flashlight i shine in drivers eyes before they hit me to.


    i need a tune up.
     
  6. old*824

    old*824 Senior Member

    Joined: Jun 8, 2003 Messages: 1,362 Likes Received: 0
    oh that was 80 miles a week i ride....

    just so you know.
     
  7. old*824

    old*824 Senior Member

    Joined: Jun 8, 2003 Messages: 1,362 Likes Received: 0
    btw...some one just stole my bianchi.
     
  8. krie

    krie Guest

    i once left mine unlocked deliberalty so it would get stolen so i could get a new, better bike!
    and it diddd!!!
    and the next week, i got an even better brand spankin new bike!

    all the kids in the street were so jealous
     
  9. wiseguy

    wiseguy Elite Member

    Joined: Mar 1, 2002 Messages: 2,543 Likes Received: 1
    sorry about your misfurtune, but i was in stitichess when i read this...
     
  10. Gunm

    Gunm Banned

    Joined: Aug 31, 2003 Messages: 12,427 Likes Received: 1
    no problems.....just go steal someone elses bike to replace the one you lost.

    1. You'll have a new bike to ride

    2. You'll ensure this vicious cycle of bike theft (no pun intended..haw haw) continues thereby extending the life of karma on this planet.
     
  11. Rectum

    Rectum Senior Member

    Joined: Nov 13, 2002 Messages: 1,501 Likes Received: 0
    haha


    and freightlover i dont know about everyone else but i did not want you to say that
     
  12. vinyl junkie

    vinyl junkie Elite Member

    Joined: Jan 17, 2002 Messages: 4,725 Likes Received: 0
    a few months ago someone broke into my garage and stole bikes from 2 of my room mates (i keep mine locked, even in the garage... and the fancy one lives inside the house)
    last week i was walking home from band practuce amd someone asks if i want to buy a bike (a regular occurance in my neighborhood)... i told him to fuck off...
    i take a couple steps and realize it's one of my room mate's bikes (it's a pretty rare bike)... i say oh shit and turn around, dude hears me say that and takes off...
    it sucked...
    however i sawsomeone try to steal my fixie from in front of the bar a few months ago, and he got bucked off it after just a couple feet... that in itself was fucking hilarious, but then everyone that was outside the bar kicked his ass... i never laid a finger on him, and dude left the place bleeding and limping... it was fucking awesome...
     
  13. SteveAustin

    SteveAustin Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 12, 2002 Messages: 7,042 Likes Received: 2
    ^^ thats the absolute best thing about fixies. you leave 'em right outside where everyone is tempted to steal it. when they jump on it, start riding and either try to coast or look for the brakes is when it gets really funny.

    some little kid stole one of my friends mountian fixies. The bike was waaayyy too big for him but he still managed to ride it for a few weeks. Kid got busted when he rode by the bike shop the guy worked for. Heard the shop just emptied when they saw it go buy. Kid was scared shitless.
     
  14. ~KRYLON2~

    ~KRYLON2~ 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Oct 13, 2001 Messages: 10,443 Likes Received: 192
    yo freightlover it was probably me.....i stole a yellow trek on saturday...the frame kinda looks a little weird in the sense it dosnt look like a regular bike frame......well anyways i was to drunk to drive and to broke to get a cab and i didnt feel like walking 8 blocksto my house so instead i walked up to a random garages and tried opening the doors and finally i stumbled into a garage that wasnt locked and swiped your bike...but seriously i was probably better off walking cuz trying to turn with a front tire flat when your drunk sucks....i wiped out a good 3-4 times before i got home i got the road rash allover the right side of my leg....sorry homie..

    by the way was your bike by any chance yellow?
     
  15. fr8lover

    fr8lover Elite Member

    Joined: Oct 22, 2000 Messages: 3,919 Likes Received: 1
    nah purple with a flat back tire..
     
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