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greyhound...the finest form of travel available


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LA greyhound terminal gets fucken scary bein near skid row and shit. I used to go on that shit from LA to oaktown a lot. I met some cool heads a few times and blazed it at the halfway burgerking stop off the 5. I also met some dude from the village in the O that kicked it with the lunies. I saw him 6 months later at a show and I got to kick it with their crew, I even went down to their hood and smoked a few, Before that I never new how deep Oakland got.

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Baltimore....

 

The station is in a damp back street if I remember correctly. Crumbling brick walls, lots of stickers, posters and other dismal things rotting off the surrounding walls. If you turn a few corners you get to the open street, some sulking middle aged men selling cheap sunglasses. I didn't spend much time at all in that station but it was definately one of the most depressing. I ate some lukewarm cup noodles there though....

 

Port Authority NY....

What a great feeling, curled up like a little sleeping sardine and waking up to a vision of new york. They played bagger vance on like 3 of my east coast trips which was a nighmare. I bought a phone card that didnt work and some limp salad.

 

Boston..

That station is like a freakin airport...so modern. I was starving..it was late so I wandered across the street to China town toting my backback, and a duffel bag with about 30 full cans in it. Some nice girls served me a fanta and 75 cent bowl of soup..it was hot and therfore good. I dont really know what was in it though.

 

Something funny, in Richmond and a couple other cities people asked me to watch their bags while they went to the bathroom or to get something to eat. Maybe I look trustworthy? :confused:

 

Ok this is boring.

I dont have anything to do for an hour.

 

In Lakeland Fla. a black woman asked me if i "was spanish" i sad no...but i speak a little. she then went off in a wild rage about how hispanic men abused her but she dont take nooo shit. then on to how bad hispanic people are but she dont take nooo shit, then that she was going to take off her belt , lock the goddamn bathroom door and beat me.my only crime being very silent, and not very spanish.

I knocked her over and ran out the door, i didnt really say anything to anyone because " hey there is a crazy black woman threatening to beat me with a belt in the bathroom, and if you look hispanic watch your ass" sounds a litte nuts.

 

when im not in such a dull mood ill write better things, in a better way later.

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Wierd Shit Happens on Greyhound

 

Especially to young people. I was on Greyhound once about 1972, when I was 22. I had just gotten off a freight train in Salt Lake City, laid up for a few days with a woman who was an IWW organizer and hung out at the One Big Union bar, and then started hitching to Texas (I thought it would be faster than hopping.) After a few days of getting ignored by tourists zooming by, I managed to flag down a bus. The driver quoted me a very reasonable price, and I dragged up the $35 or whatever it was, and bought a ticket to Houston. Back in the back of the bus were three or four young people. The rest of the passengers were like weary welfare grandmothers with screaming kids, and guys who looked like they just got out of prison.

 

I struck up a conversation with these kids and one of the girls said to come sit with her. So we shot the breeze all day. At the restaurant, we ate together. That night it was cold, so I broke out my sleeping bag and we were like cuddled up under this bag, with her using my shoulder for a pillow. I'm thinking, "This is so cool! This girl is falling for me big time!" She was very good-looking, but a little younger than me, maybe 18 or 19. Anyhow, when her stop came, she gave me a long, lingering goodbye kiss and her address.

 

I went to my Mom's house to visit for a few days, and wrote the girl a letter, sort of like, "I really enjoyed our trip, you are a wonderful person, why don't we get together and go out a few times to see what happens?" I was more than willing to re-locate, being basically a footloose and fancy-free hobo tramp at that point.

 

She wrote me back and said "You have the wrong idea. I have a boyfriend, and don't write me any more."

 

So why do you suppose she gave me her address? Wierd ass shit happens on Greyhound.

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Originally posted by Snack Pack

ive never done the greyhound without a bottle of jack and plenty of xanax. and I've done my fair share... ive gone coast to coast more than once.....

 

this my friends is the only way i'll go bluedog. two high light moments)(there are so many):

 

randomn girls are always in the back when i get on, go figure, and i'm not complaining. so i get on in aalbuquerque going to portland or. by the time we're in phoenix she's nobbin at my dennis like fog-horn leg-horn. all the frequent stops and people going to the bathroom and what not, but right around sacramento, i bust. and i mean like like ear's ringing, toes curling to my heels, muscle cramping burstage. after i was done i realized i had been making this howling at the moon type sound and everyone on the bus was staring right at me. all i could do was smile.

 

this one happened to my boy matt. we're coming from l.a. to atlanta, and right as we get to blythe, last or first city in cali depending direction, he drinks water from the mickey-d's bathroom faucet and gets severe diarrhea. so as we drive, he's running back to the bathroom every ten-fifteen minutes, and it's loud ones, so every body is either cringing or laughing, me being a part of the latter group. so he comes back from one trip and explains the dreaded blue bidet effect. sitting in the greyhound bus and hitting a bump in the road, causing splash back. i'll let you picture it and cut the story right there.

 

pleasant travelling...

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Guest KING OF HELL

Ive pulled my share of greayhound adventures. Ive moved across country on them twice, and my plain ole' traveling miles are clocking somewhere around ten thousand miles.

A friend of mine wrote a short essay entitled "degenerates ride the bus" and I still say its true. Ive had some of my worst, most down trodden times on those damn busses.

 

Chicago. 1994. Man with one tooth gets on the bus and sits right behind me.He produces from his pocket a giant pink comb and taps me on the shoulder and asks if he can comb out my dreadlocks. I, of course say "leave me alone."

Home boy shuts up for about two hours, and then my friend who is sitting across the isle from me says "yo.. what the fuck are you doing man"?

I look back and dude is trying to eat my hair.

 

With one tooth he is trying to eat my hair.

He said "well you woulnt let me comb it, Fred. I just got hungry...what do you expect?"

 

I said "my names not Fred". He said, and I quote, "Well you can't call lettuce cabbage, and theres cheese between my toes, so as far as I'm concerend you need to cut your hair young man."

 

I still havent recovered from that.

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Originally posted by ink Lunatic

Baltimore....

 

The station is in a damp back street if I remember correctly. Crumbling brick walls, lots of stickers, posters and other dismal things rotting off the surrounding walls. If you turn a few corners you get to the open street, some sulking middle aged men selling cheap sunglasses. I didn't spend much time at all in that station but it was definately one of the most depressing. I ate some lukewarm cup noodles there though....

 

Port Authority NY....

What a great feeling, curled up like a little sleeping sardine and waking up to a vision of new york. They played bagger vance on like 3 of my east coast trips which was a nighmare. I bought a phone card that didnt work and some limp salad.

 

Boston..

That station is like a freakin airport...so modern. I was starving..it was late so I wandered across the street to China town toting my backback, and a duffel bag with about 30 full cans in it. Some nice girls served me a fanta and 75 cent bowl of soup..it was hot and therfore good. I dont really know what was in it though.

 

Something funny, in Richmond and a couple other cities people asked me to watch their bags while they went to the bathroom or to get something to eat. Maybe I look trustworthy? :confused:

 

Ok this is boring.

I dont have anything to do for an hour.

 

In Lakeland Fla. a black woman asked me if i "was spanish" i sad no...but i speak a little. she then went off in a wild rage about how hispanic men abused her but she dont take nooo shit. then on to how bad hispanic people are but she dont take nooo shit, then that she was going to take off her belt , lock the goddamn bathroom door and beat me.my only crime being very silent, and not very spanish.

I knocked her over and ran out the door, i didnt really say anything to anyone because " hey there is a crazy black woman threatening to beat me with a belt in the bathroom, and if you look hispanic watch your ass" sounds a litte nuts.

 

when im not in such a dull mood ill write better things, in a better way later.

 

baltimore is so weird cuz you got to go through a really tight alley to get to it. but there's another one which is like all big and cleaner.

 

port authority is so nice now compared to maybe like 7 or 8 yrs ago. i used to smoke inside which is weird for ny now.

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heres a short one..

i get on in oakland to go to LA to transfer to san diego..This is right around christmas,so the busses are packed.I get to the front of the line and the driver says he can take 2 more.So this lady is before me and we give the guy our checked luggage and have to wait a couple of minutes and then get on the bus.The first open seat is next to some crazy looking homeless fool.The lady takes it."ha ha" I think and make my way towards the back.Suddenly a horrible thought hits me.Oh no,please dont let the only open seat be the one im thinking of.Yep there it is the middle seat in the back bench...On either side big mexican mullet having migrant worker looking fools.Well the bus had already started moving so i got to squeeze in between these two fucks for 11 hours to LA.what a blast....

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