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GETTING IN TO A FIGHT WITH A... KUNG FU BLACK BELT....

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by ElectricitySucks, Jul 10, 2002.

  1. ElectricitySucks

    ElectricitySucks Veteran Member

    Joined: Jul 13, 2001 Messages: 6,395 Likes Received: 24
    ok, last night im walking around with a few friends minding our own business. we walk past the back of a foodstrore where theres got to be around 20 people and theyre all arguing...so we decide to cut through this persons backyard and peep over the fence to see what the deal is.
    some are speaking english, others chinese or some language. all the sudden, these guys all form a circle and 2 motherfuckers start kicking the shit out of themselves with these spin kicks and locks and throws and shit, bruce lee style....so of course, my stupid ass friend yells "yeah! fuck that nigga up!" or something like that, he was a tad bit intoxicated. we freeze and my friends expression is like "whats the big deal?" type of shit. so all these guys look in our direction in the dark bushes. a few start to get close and we start walking away slowy, trying not to be heard. then, these 3 guys spot us, we run like scared ass little pussys. my friend falls and vomits and one of the guys stops. so its just the 2 of us now running as fast as we could, we broke up and, met again still running as these 2 fast ninja fucks are still following us. what seemed like running and jumping over fences and shit for around 10 minutes seemed like 3 hours. so we have no choice but to give up and its only these 2 guys, not 20. fuck....so i start sweet talking, like sorry man, can we just go now? it seems like a fucking movie now, these 2 guys are circling around us. one guy kicks me in the back of the head and i fall to the ground. the same guy elbows my friend by the stomach/ribs. these fucks are fast as fuck man. then these 2 guys talk to each other in some language and walk away fastly...

    i have never been so scared in my life. right now, im still a little paranoid to walk outside cause i think there gonna be right there.
    fucking wierd, but my friend who fell we met up with later, still drunk and all like "yoooo man, those guys were sickkk yooo."

    my head still hurts from getting kicked so fucking hard. i thought i was going to get murdered or some shit.
    moral is dont fuck with kung fu guys. :spent:
     
  2. -Rage-

    -Rage- 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Apr 12, 2001 Messages: 10,006 Likes Received: 27
    You have stupid friends.
     
  3. Ken E. Bus

    Ken E. Bus Member

    Joined: May 7, 2002 Messages: 311 Likes Received: 0
  4. DETO

    DETO 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Apr 25, 2002 Messages: 11,316 Likes Received: 138
    good thing it wasn't a ninja turtle.
    http://www.ninjaturtles.com/mov1pix/mov04.jpg'>
    [img]http://www.ninjaturtles.com/mov1pix/mov05.jpg'>
    [img]http://www.ninjaturtles.com/mov1pix/mov06.jpg'>
    [img]http://www.ninjaturtles.com/mov1pix/mov07.jpg'>
     
  5. test pattern

    test pattern Elite Member

    Joined: Jan 21, 2002 Messages: 3,975 Likes Received: 0
    Jeet Kune Do is nice.

    I love it.
     
  6. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Guest

    kung-fu lesson # 1

    Mind your own damn business.

    Even if these guys had feuding families that go all the way back to Feudal Japan,
    they'd still take a moment out of their day to kick your ass.
     
  7. DETO

    DETO 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Apr 25, 2002 Messages: 11,316 Likes Received: 138
    History of the Ninja

    http://www.winjutsu.com/gifs/ninjakids/kids_kamae.jpg'>
    3 Ninjas. Mighty Morphin Rangers. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Beverly Hills Ninja. Children have a fascination with the mysterious Ninja warriors of ancient Japan. Every Halloween they go trick-or-treating as Ninja - dressed in black, wearing hoods and sporting plastic Ninja swords. Fortunately the image of the Ninja in our society today is shifting to a more accurate depiction than the sinister henchman image of the 1980s. Ninja were not evil assassins who killed for fun. Ninja did engage in guerrilla warfare and espionage when necessary, but for the most part they were ordinary people who developed certain skills in order to survive the difficult times in feudal Japan's history.

    "Ninjutsu" is usually translated as the "art of stealth." The Japanese character, "nin" (also translated as "shinobi") has many meanings, such as perseverance, endurance, and sufferance. The term Ninjutsu is most commonly used to refer to the specific methods and techniques used by the Ninja. Ninjutsu as a way of life didn't happen overnight. It developed over the course of many years. The name Ninjutsu itself didn't come about until several generations after the Ninja lifestyle began.

    Ninjutsu was created in central Honshu (the largest of the Japanese islands) about eleven hundred years ago. It was developed by mountain-dwelling families in an area not unlike the American Appalachians, where the terrain is rugged and remote. Ninja families were great observers of nature. They felt a close connection to the Earth, similar to the Native Americans, and their lifestyle was one that lived according to the laws of Nature, not against it. Ninja were also very spiritual people, and their beliefs became an integral part of Ninjutsu.

    One of the spiritual influences was Shinto, "the way of the kami." Kami is the Japanese word for "god" or "deity." It implies, however, a feeling for a sacred or charismatic force, rather than a being. The early Japanese regarded their whole world: the rivers, mountains, lakes, and trees, to have their own energy and spirit.

    Another spiritual influence on the Ninja was Mikkyo. Mikkyo, for the Ninja, was not a religion as much as it was a method for enhancing personal power. These methods included the use of secret words and symbols to focus their energy and intentions toward specific goals.

    It is generally accepted that the methods found in Ninjutsu originated outside of Japan. After the fall of the T'ang dynasty in China, many outcast warriors, philosophers, and military strategists escaped to Japan to avoid punishment by the new Chinese rulers. It is believed that Ninja families were exposed to many of these exiled people's sophisticated warrior strategies and philosophies over the centuries, helping to influence and shape what became Ninjutsu.

    The Ninja were also very much influenced by a group of people called Shugenja, who roamed the same mountainous sections as the Ninja. The Shugendo method of spiritual self-discovery consisted of subjecting oneself to the harsh weather and terrain of the area in order to draw strength from the earth itself. They would walk through fire, stand beneath freezing waterfalls, and hang over the edges of cliffs in an effort to overcome fear and assume the powers of nature.

    It would be incorrect to say that these three spiritual methods were the actual roots of Ninjutsu, but there is little doubt that they were a large influence. Ninjutsu was and is a separate philosophy.

    The Ninja were not particularly warlike, yet they were constantly harassed by the ruling society of Japan. They were routinely subjected to unfair taxation and religious persecution. The Ninja eventually learned to act more and more efficiently in their own self-defense. They used their superior knowledge of the workings of nature, as well as specific military techniques passed down through the years, as weapons against the numerically superior government armies. They used any ruse, harbored any superstition, and employed any strategy to protect themselves. If necessary, they would use devious political manipulations to ensure peace.

    There were as many as seventy or eighty Ninja clans operating in the Koga and Iga regions of Japan during the height of Ninja activity. Most of these Ninja were descendants of, or were themselves, displaced samurai. Therefore, they operated on the sidelines of the political schemes of the government. Sometimes a Ninja family would use its military or information-gathering resources to protect its members from becoming victims in a power play between competing samurai clans. Occasionally, a Ninja family would support one faction over another, if they felt it to be to their advantage.

    As with any society, there were renegades who misused the training they received. Occasionally, "Ninja" would rent themselves out for espionage or assassination work. Unfortunately these outcasts have become the stereotype of the "evil ninja" that we see today in the media. They were, however, a minority. The average Ninja worked very much in conjunction with his family and community goals.

    Ninja were not always primarily soldiers. Of course, certain Ninja operatives, or genin, were trained from childhood as warriors. But this training was usually precautionary. Genin Ninja knew that they might be called to help protect the community at some future time, but, they often spent most of their lives as farmers or tradespeople. Ninja intelligence gatherers sent to live in the strongholds of potential enemies were rarely required to act openly.

    If an operative was called to action it was as a result of a carefully plotted, and usually desperate, plan. The genin would be contacted and assigned a mission by his chunin superior. The chunin, or middle man, was a "middle-man" between the jonin family leader and the operative. Jonin made all philosophical and long-range strategic decisions for the clan. Often, the identity of the jonin was kept secret from chunin and genin, alike. Of course certain historical periods required more secret activity than others.

    Eventually this activity virtually died out altogether but the legacies, in some cases, remained.

    The Roots of Ninjutsu

    Although there has been an evolution of Ninjutsu as a life philosophy over the centuries, the fundamental principles have remained virtually unchanged. Togakure ryu Ninjutsu is more than 800 years old. Except for a relatively short period of notoriety prior to the reign of the Tokugawas, the art lived quietly in the hearts of just a few people. The Ninja were a separate society from the urban centered ruling class and the non-privileged classes which served them. Consider the gulf that must have existed between the new American government and the American Indians during the first 125 years following the signing of the Declaration of Independence. Although this is an incomplete and potentially misleading analogy, it may give you a better understanding on how Ninjutsu may have developed as a counterculture to the samurai-dominated Japanese society.

    For hundreds of years Ninja families lived in the mountains, practicing their esoteric methods of approaching enlightenment through gaining an understanding of the basic laws of nature. History had taught them that they must be prepared to protect their family and their lifestyle. They perfected a system of martial arts that has earned them the reputation for being the most amazing warriors the world has ever known. It is this reputation that initially attracts most people.

    The Ninja's reputation is put into a better perspective when some facts are brought to light. First, Ninja were not wizards or witches, of course, but ordinary men and women with a unique and misunderstood philosophical viewpoint. This philosophy became a very important part of their combat method. Hence, we refer to our art as Ninpo, the "po" suggesting "a higher order", or "encompassing philosophy." The samurai approach to combat was called bushido; it evolved from a general set of guidelines for the gentleman warrior into a formal discipline. The Ninja philosophy, though sharing many of the same values as the original samurai, evolved along a different cultural path.

    The Ninja's sometimes devious tactics were seen by some as cowardly and disgusting.* From the Ninja point of view, however, guerrilla warfare versus a numerically superior force was plain good sense. The Ninja were outnumbered, as a rule, so they had to use unusual methods if they ever hoped to survive. Nevertheless, victory was not always ensured. Japanese history books tell of instances of entire Ninja clans being destroyed.

    Many times, however, the unusual methods did succeed. Without a working knowledge of the Ninja philosophy, their opponents were unable to figure out the Ninjutsu strategies. The Ninja only seemed like wizards.

    Second, stories which have created the modern image of the Ninja as thoughtless criminals, were written after the fact by historians who were sympathetic to the samurai point of view. Since Ninja were not bushi (followers of the samurais' strict code of martial ethics) they were looked down upon as being uncivilized.

    Third, the exaggerations of Ninja abilities were started by the Ninja themselves as a deterrent to outside interference. The demonstrated prowess of the Ninja as warriors, as well as the fact that they were such a closed and uncommunicative society, combined to create an opportunity for them to exaggerate their own skills and surround themselves with an eerie cloak of mystery. It is very easy to be frightened of something that is not understood. Thus, this frightening and supernatural mystique was born.** If, however, it was merely the guerrilla tactics of the Ninja that were useful, the lore of the Ninja would not be of interest to the wide range of people who enjoy practicing Ninjutsu today. Far more than stealth or assassination techniques, Ninpo, or the essence of the Ninja's outlook, is a physical, emotional, and spiritual method of self-protection from the dangers that confront those on the warrior path to enlightenment.
     
  8. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Guest

    yep... every boy wants to be a ninja, then they want to be a Rockstar, then they want to be Hugh Heffner, then they want to be Hemmingway.
     
  9. DETO

    DETO 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Apr 25, 2002 Messages: 11,316 Likes Received: 138
    then Deto wants to be Scarface!!! [​IMG]
     
  10. KaBar

    KaBar Senior Member

    Joined: Oct 9, 2001 Messages: 1,397 Likes Received: 10
    I'm with Zesto

    And Rule# 2---"Don't get so fucked up that you can't tell when you are making a big ass mistake."

    And I got my Key Largo Papa pajamas on right now.
     
  11. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Guest

    good point!

    and kung-fu rule #3...

    Don't associate with people that will get you in trouble.
    aka You are the company you keep.

    (just dont go kissing that shotgun ok?)
     
  12. jah

    jah Elite Member

    Joined: Dec 30, 2001 Messages: 2,705 Likes Received: 2
    find those fools and rush em. hahahahahaha. get drunk first of course....
     
  13. chicken bone

    chicken bone Guest

    awesome story! i remember there was a fight once between this brazillian dude and a japanese gangster, and the brasil guy knew copeira and he did a round house kick pow out the guys knife and did a foot sweep then started stomping on him. shit was like eddie from tekken.

    or a couple days ago 4 dudes were beating on this little indian guy across the street but the little dude was so fast and he was like ducking and dodging mad punches but then they threw him down and were stomping on his head and trying to kick him into traffic (he was right next to curb) but little dude had heart and broke free like the whale from the iceberg shackles of nature, flying into the oblivion (building) i guess to get backup.
     
  14. drunken phil

    drunken phil Guest

    "mommy i dont wanna go to school today"
    "why is that junior?"
    "i got beat up by some ninjas yesterday"
    "now what have i told you about making these things up... you know how it upsets your father"

    ~~a skit by PUkEY~~



    ~PUkE:crazy:
     
  15. drunken phil

    drunken phil Guest

    well put....
     
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