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Fun Stuff: How To Start Your Own Gang

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by LocoLars, Mar 27, 2003.

  1. LocoLars

    LocoLars New Jack

    Joined: Mar 25, 2003 Messages: 55 Likes Received: 1
    If you are reading this textfile, then you are probably interested in starting you very own
    little gang. Why should I start my own gang? Well, you can definitely make some money. You can
    get some hardcore respect, and you Choose your Own hours. There are some downsides to this Idea
    though. You have to watch your back from rival gangs. You have to put up with the Cops, and you
    must keep your guys inline.

    Now, lets move on to you setting up your business.

    You will need some people willing to join you. Friends that you have will work just fine. But
    keep in mind that your friends will ALWAYS want to be the leader. Do not let this happen. TAKE A
    STAND. Make it CLEAR that YOU are the leader of your gang. Once you have some members, you can
    move onto getting a few things that you will need.

    GUNS.
    Every gang must have guns. It is what protects you from rivals. If you are over 21, go to your
    nearest Gun Store and buy one. If you are under 21, Go to a very large city. Hang around the
    streets until you see a drug dealer. Once you see one, ask him to point you to an area where you
    can get some guns. Once you find some, give the money, and you got some heaters. Make sure that
    you keep the Arms dealers Phone Number. You will need it for ammunition. Street Guns usually run
    about $50 to $100 each. Sometimes you can find some for $25. These are good prices. Learn how to
    shoot your gun, and pass them out to your men. Carry your gun everywhere that you go, you will
    need it sooner or later.

    SETTING UP
    Every gang needs money. You will need to buy some cheap dope, or make your own. You can find many
    many files on the internet on how to make your own drugs. Go to www.textfiles.com for manuals on
    how to make your own. Make your drugs. Once your product is finished, get some of your guys to go
    out on the street and sell it. You will need to get some walkie talkies.

    SELLING
    There is an effective process that you should follow when selling your product. You should have
    three of your guys out on the streets each. Give two of your guys one walkie talkies. Give one of
    your guys all of your dope. Now send them off on the streets with these instructions.

    Stay together.

    One with the walkie talkie will be the lookout. If he spots ANYTHING, he will contact the other
    with the second walkie talkie. Then they will split out of there.

    Now onto the one that you gave all of your dope to. He carry the money, and give the dope. He
    should be standing next to a payphone, so he can call you for more if he needs it. If he calls
    for more, you will send another guy out to deliver it.

    Now for the seller. He will stand around the streets selling the dope. When he gets the money, he
    will give it to the guy that carrys the money.


    SELLING GUNS
    Once you have made enough cash selling dope, you can make a buy for a bunch of guns. Once you
    have made your buy. Put them all in the trunk of a car, and drive to a real bad part of town.
    Walk around and ask people "hey, you need some protection?". If they say "ya, sure." Then lead
    them to the car, and let them make they're pick. Sell them for about $20 more than you bought
    them for. You should now have a FUCKLOAD of money to start moving on to bigger and better things.

    PIMPING
    A very effective way to get some money is through pimping. Pimping is when you go to a hooker on
    the street, and ask her if she needs a pimp. A Pimps job is to offer her protection from assholes
    that won't give her the money, or try to rape her. When you get some girls working for you, send
    them out on the street. Tell them where to do business. Once every two hours, you need to go and
    visit them. She will give you all of the money that she has made. When her job is over, you give
    her a 40% cut. Stick with this plan for a few months. After a few months, you should have some
    real heavy money buy now.

    SAFEHOUSING
    You now have some real good heavy cash. Go to the worst part of town, and search for a house, or
    a shitty apartment building for sale. Try to find one with a nice size garage. If you find one
    for the right price, buy it. You will now need to have a meeting with all of your members. You
    will tell them you are opening a safe house, and that they need to guard it heavily. You will
    need at least 10 people guarding it at all times depending on the size of the safehouse. Once you
    have your safehouse guarded, you will need to attract some business. Go around town to some
    people that you know, and tell them that if they get in any trouble, they can hide out there. If
    they have stolen any cars, they can hide them in your garage for a price. Tell your guards not to
    take any heat from the cops. Tell them to fight to the death if they have to. When you start
    getting business from your safehouse, you should be getting hardcore money coming through to fuel
    your next project.


    CRACKHOUSING
    This project requires a lot of balls, and a lot of guards. To set up, you will need a lot of
    guns, and about 20 guys helping you out. Go find an apartment building for sale. One that is in a
    shitty part of town. Buy it. Now, completely clear the entire place out. If there are people
    still living there, then kick them out. Kill anyone that gives you a struggle. Storm the place
    clean. When you are done, find a room or someplace in the building where you can setup a
    chemistry lab (you should have somebody that knows how to make crack). Clean a big room out, and
    put a bunch of tables down. The room should be big enough to hold about 75-100 people. On each
    table throughout the room, should be some glass pipes for your customers to smoke they're Crack.
    Once everything is setup, you can start getting people to come there. Set as many guards as you
    need in the building, and out of the building. Now start attracting business. You now have the
    BEST crackhouse in town. Tell your men to protect it from the cops with they're life. By the end
    of the month, you should have about $200,000.


    TERRITORY
    Now that you have a quite large gang, some of money, and members, you should start moving onto
    other gangs territory. Your goal is the entire city!!! Begin a complete war against any other
    gangs that stand in your way. Hit the leaders of the gangs as hard as you can. Because you are
    the leader, you will not be doing this yourself. You will be at your Safehouse making battle
    plans. Before you know it, every other gang will be coming to you for work. But be careful, they
    may be looking for revenge. If you know that they are, then kill them.


    MURDER FOR HIRE
    You will need to recruit some new members that know a lot about killing. Once you find someone
    that you trust, you can hire him to work for you as a member. Anyone that comes to you asking for
    someone to be dead, you will give the mission to your Hit Man. The person that wants someone dead
    must pay you at least $9,000. Your Hit Man must do an A+ job, or else you won't get any more
    business. If you can not find a Hit Man that will work for you, then you should take a willing
    member, and give him "Hit Man: A Technical Manual for Independent Contractors." Here is the link
    to the book.

    http://web.textfiles.com/destruction/hitman.txt

    When you Hit Man does a Job, you should give him 60% of the Money paid.


    BUSINESS FRONT
    A Business Front is a legal business that you set up to hide what you actually do. By now, you
    will need one. You must first think up a business that you want to set up. It can be an art
    gallery, a night club, a church, etc. You now have enough money to make a business. So make your
    pick. Your front is meant to look legit, but is really not. You could even open up a hotdog
    factory. If so, then all of the people that you kill will turn into hotdog meat! You will need a
    business front in order to hide from the cops.


    MONEY LAUNDERING
    Since you are now a leader of a giant gang, you will probably be bringing in serious cash. The
    cash that you bring in is probably dirty. So you will need to launder it in order to spend it.
    The only bad thing is, when you launder it, you will only get about 75 cents to the dollar. So,
    in order to launder it, you will need a business to launder it through. Let's say an art auction.
    First, get somebody to paint a picture. You must now get the business to except the auction. Once
    that is done, take your dirty money to the auction, and bid on that painting for the exact amount
    that you need to launder. The money will then go to the artists bank account (the artist is a
    fellow gang member). The artist will then pull out all of the money, and give it to you. Now you
    have clean money that is almost impossible to trace. This can also be done on ebay with paypal.

    By now, you probably have millions of dollars, and the police, and rival gangs hate you. You will
    need some body guards. You are no longer safe being by yourself anywhere. You will need guards in
    front of your house. You no longer will be able to be a street soldier. You are now a boss. Your
    gang is so big now, that you probably shouldn't even call it a gang.


    COMMUNITY PROTECTION
    If you are a real asshole, then you should use this one. You and your men should go around town
    and force people to pay you for protection from other gangs. If someone refuses to pay you, then
    he gets the living shit beat out of him. It is an old trick to get money. It has been used many
    times, and proved successfull.


    LOANSHARKING
    Loansharking is when you lend somebody a heafty amount of cash, and the person has to pay you
    back with intrest within so many weeks. Set up connections with some people to let them know that
    you are now in the loansharking business. Loan your money, and after a period of time, he will
    have to pay you back. If he fails to do so, then you break his arm. The more time passes, you
    break more bones. If he is just way to late on his payment, he will have to die. If he fails to
    pay you, you should send some of your men out to follow him frequently. Because if he is not
    being watched, he will probably try to skip town.


    and that Concludes this textfile. Be Carefull with your gang. Keep it protected!!!
     
  2. DorkstaR

    DorkstaR Senior Member

    Joined: May 24, 2002 Messages: 1,404 Likes Received: 0
    so.... anyone catch south park tonite?
     
  3. Giving Tree

    Giving Tree Senior Member

    Joined: Nov 26, 2001 Messages: 1,111 Likes Received: 0
    bhump for gangfs niggha... haha.. ficl a gamkg.. hha..


    drnkes like what.. 12 oz drunks hooll aif you hear me!

    its soo fuckin funy

    haa;
     
  4. shaolinmasta

    shaolinmasta Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 26, 2003 Messages: 7,884 Likes Received: 157
    fair enough i dont know about tha walkie talkies though
     
  5. krie

    krie Guest

    i roll with mym mom, shes gangstaaaaaa
     
  6. LocoLars

    LocoLars New Jack

    Joined: Mar 25, 2003 Messages: 55 Likes Received: 1
    you bet she is!!!!!!!
     
  7. Zack Morris

    Zack Morris Veteran Member

    Joined: Jun 23, 2001 Messages: 9,728 Likes Received: 4
    yeah...and if you don't like it pass the blunt to the nigga on your left.
     
  8. When

    When 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: May 4, 2000 Messages: 10,294 Likes Received: 3
    that actually wasnt a bad article if you fill in some parts.

    im watching southpark right now, the crips haha
     
  9. effyoo

    effyoo Elite Member

    Joined: Sep 2, 2002 Messages: 4,703 Likes Received: 0
    Yup, its like "How to Be an Artist" then telling you how to draw.
     
  10. puhfester

    puhfester Member

    Joined: Mar 25, 2002 Messages: 611 Likes Received: 39
    internet gangs is the best ........step one..steal a computer
    step two... LeARn hOwTO WrITe GAnGstARRIFfiK.
    Step three... commence to aoling
     
  11. Dirty_habiT

    Dirty_habiT Administrator

    Joined: Mar 8, 2001 Messages: 18,107 Likes Received: 73
    Yeah, I read the article... but alot of that stuff I already knew.
     
  12. LocoLars

    LocoLars New Jack

    Joined: Mar 25, 2003 Messages: 55 Likes Received: 1
    i didnt write the thing.... i got it off of


    www.diy-auction.com ... there is a bunch of fun shit there under like scams and mischief and fun stuff

    on the home page click the top right link... i think it is like "diy auction"... i dunno.. i just know it's at the top write
     
  13. LocoLars

    LocoLars New Jack

    Joined: Mar 25, 2003 Messages: 55 Likes Received: 1
    so who is starting a gang?
     
  14. SCUMBAG

    SCUMBAG New Jack

    Joined: Dec 3, 2002 Messages: 0 Likes Received: 0
    me. right now.....
     
  15. LocoLars

    LocoLars New Jack

    Joined: Mar 25, 2003 Messages: 55 Likes Received: 1
    good, make sure it is a damn good one
     
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