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FUN AT WAL-MART

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by ETHREADZNY, Nov 19, 2002.

  1. ETHREADZNY

    ETHREADZNY Elite Member

    Joined: Feb 11, 2002 Messages: 3,129 Likes Received: 4
    I DONT KNOW IF THIS HAS BEEN PREVIOUSLY POSTED< BUT IF IT HAS FUCK-it, LET THE MOTHERFUCKER SINK...


    FUN AT WAL-MART

    Ways to Have a Fun Time At Wal-Mart

    Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.

    Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.

    Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him "Where are your tampons?"

    Try on bras over top of your clothes.

    Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms.

    While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible "I smell sex and candy"

    Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in housewares," and see what happens.

    Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10."

    Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.

    Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.

    Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.

    Put M&M's on layaway.

    Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

    Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.

    Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.

    Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.

    When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

    Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.

    Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.

    Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

    While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti depressants are.

    Switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the restrooms.

    Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."

    Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

    In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.

    Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like "pick me!! pick me!!" and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them.

    When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"

    Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.

    Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they don't realize it.

    Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

    Go into the dressing room and yell real loud "Hey, were out of toilet paper in here!"
     
  2. el barto

    el barto Elite Member

    Joined: Oct 14, 2001 Messages: 2,627 Likes Received: 1
    first, and you have a lot of time on your hands.
     
  3. ETHREADZNY

    ETHREADZNY Elite Member

    Joined: Feb 11, 2002 Messages: 3,129 Likes Received: 4
  4. Dr. Drew

    Dr. Drew Guest

    RESPONDING TO A LAME THREAD, KEEPS THE THREAD AROUND MUCH LONGER
     
  5. ~KRYLON2~

    ~KRYLON2~ 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Oct 13, 2001 Messages: 10,443 Likes Received: 191
    another quality thread....
     
  6. 455

    455 Guest

    haha.....that's funny.......last time I was there to get paint......My friend and I decided to have a shouting match in the clothes department yelling loudly ripping on the Stone Cold Steve Austin t-shirts......and switching the sizes around of the jeans.......and making fun of this punk who was "giving us the screwface".....hahaha....good times.
     
  7. el barto

    el barto Elite Member

    Joined: Oct 14, 2001 Messages: 2,627 Likes Received: 1
    i know, fuck those who bump this.




































    hehe.
     
  8. dai

    dai Senior Member

    Joined: Oct 30, 2001 Messages: 1,052 Likes Received: 0
    you forgot about formula 1 electric cart racing! :eek:
     
  9. DorkstaR

    DorkstaR Senior Member

    Joined: May 24, 2002 Messages: 1,404 Likes Received: 0
    ETHREADZNY deserves his own appreciation thread. that comment about putting m&m's on layaway made me laugh out loud. this stuff is golden. his unending string of threads has made my nite.
     
  10. ETHREADZNY

    ETHREADZNY Elite Member

    Joined: Feb 11, 2002 Messages: 3,129 Likes Received: 4
    yeah, let it fade away with my hairline.
     
  11. 455

    455 Guest

    ^^^^^hahaha......uhhhh,yeah.

    it would be kinda funny to just post up and take pictures of the people going inside the store to shop........depending on where you live,you will see some "winners"......
     
  12. ETHREADZNY

    ETHREADZNY Elite Member

    Joined: Feb 11, 2002 Messages: 3,129 Likes Received: 4
    I am glad some people enjoy some comedy every once and a while. but like I said those that dont approve, let it fade away with my hairline.
     
  13. el barto

    el barto Elite Member

    Joined: Oct 14, 2001 Messages: 2,627 Likes Received: 1
    aww man im sorry i had no idea your hair was receading.
     
  14. •nakone•

    •nakone• Member

    Joined: Jul 2, 2002 Messages: 967 Likes Received: 0
  15. ETHREADZNY

    ETHREADZNY Elite Member

    Joined: Feb 11, 2002 Messages: 3,129 Likes Received: 4
    ^ Life has it's ups and downs. It's better then my missing buttcheek.
     
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