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Feeling Singled Out

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by Weapon X, Jun 29, 2004.

  1. Weapon X

    Weapon X 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Sep 6, 2002 Messages: 14,905 Likes Received: 202
    Oh man, this is going to sound very pathetic, but I need to get this off my chest, and I'd assume the intelligent members of 12oz can help me.

    I've been going through a bit of a crisis. It started a couple of years ago when I was coming home from school blunted.

    On the subway, I noticed a group of kids discussing astronomy, and I decided to join in the conversation, seeing as I was into that stuff at the time. Well, I didn't exactly befriend these people because they were 13 years old.

    As I transferred onto the next train, there was a group of young girls talking about classic literature. I didn't quite jump into that conversation because I didn't want to look like a pervert in front of the other adults on the train.

    On the final bus ride home, a similar thing happened, and I realized that I took a wrong turn in life somewhere. No, it wasn't the decision to be a criminal, nor being a graffiti writer. It wasn't the mass amount of drugs I did as a teenager, either, although, it could have played a role.

    *This voyage home led me to an epiphany.

    My problem is that I'm not quite in the social group I planned to be in as a kid. Don't get me wrong, I have a few friends who are intelligent in one way or another, but the most of these guys are not very multi-dimensional.

    For instance, the dude who works at the library. Smart guy, no doubt. He rents Folini (sp) films, but talks throughout the whole thing. When ased to discuss something other than what he's been taught in university (I mean anything - music, art, science, politics), he has absolutely nothing to say.

    Another example, the guy I usually paint with. He can't even discuss graffiti. That's actually a quality I like about him, the fact he doesn't give a fuck, but when he can't name more than three writers in the city besides us, it's sad, really.

    Also, there are the people that laugh at me for the books I read. I'll hang with them, but it gets frustrating when I get laughed at for using a word that is more than two syllables.

    One of my biggest near - regrets is not having gone to a university. I think I may have had a better social life had I done that, instead of choosing to go with a trade. I have confidence in that the decision I made was the right one, but there's no one at my school, nor at the jobs I take that have any opinions, save for who the Leafs should pick up, and what kind of car can spank another kind of car in a race.

    Anyway, I do have maybe one or two friends who I'd consider well bred and classy who I like chilling with, but these aren't people I see on a regular basis at all.

    Do any of you guys ever have this problem of feeling like you are not quite in the social circle you should be in?

    Oh yeah, go ahead and tell me to suck it up and be a man, etc. I tell myself this all the time.

  2. Milton

    Milton Senior Member

    Joined: May 21, 2003 Messages: 2,253 Likes Received: 0
    First... I've never done that before.

    Yes, I feel the very same way, but have given up discussing topics of science or philosophy with my friends. When I went to college I made the mistake of rooming with a friend from highschool and so I made the same friends I had in highschool and besides the ocassional girl I made contact with I basically kept the same group. But they don't really care about anything that doesn't involve smoking reefer, drinking or getting laid, and thats getting old. I mean these are valid pursuits but there is so much more to life.

    We should start a club...
  3. fuck muni

    fuck muni Senior Member

    Joined: Nov 26, 2003 Messages: 1,089 Likes Received: 4
    when im blunted i think too much about life

    so i grab a 40 of st ides and get back into my "dont give a fuck" attitude
  4. T=E=A=S=E

    T=E=A=S=E Elite Member

    Joined: Mar 27, 2004 Messages: 3,271 Likes Received: 0
    ok ok, im going to change what i said, because youre threads "aight" and plus i was just saying that to piss you off.


    ill read after i get back from this new job orientation bullshit.

    /til then, ta ta.
  5. <KEY3>

    <KEY3> Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 24, 2004 Messages: 6,878 Likes Received: 2
    I know where you are coming from.

    People used to say to me 'you think to much' usually because they had absolutely no idea what was going on around them and I have a serious need to understand as much as possible. Everyone has a few friends who just dont seem to fit your expectations. My best friend is enroute to becoming a cap and he couldn't pick up a drunk girl in a bar if human life depended on it. People are different, but there are also many similarties. Just get over the differences, but if you cant, move on.

    Also here's something to consider (based on the fact I know where you live). If you were to end up near OCAD dressed in a stupid hat and geek shoes, what are the chances you'd end up having a 'deep convo' with someone? I dont think it would be any better than right where you are now. Just because people like to 'play smart' doesnt really mean a thing. Some of the absolute brainstorms I know never try to come off smart. Just like Lisa Simpson, they've learned that being smart will only isolate yourself. So what do they do.....? Read the Guardian and the Economist but also know who got traded on the Jays. You follow that?

    Dont worry so much about fitting into a group. Most of us dont.

    KING BLING Guest

    I don't like my "smart" friends. I really can only stand one dude I know who can talk in length about more heavy topics. The rest are brilliant no doubt, but they don't have heart, they're gassed up on there own IQ...

    Wisdom is higher on my list of priorities and my time is spent accordingly...
  7. WrIot

    WrIot Senior Member

    Joined: Dec 2, 2002 Messages: 1,045 Likes Received: 0
    i feel the same damn way about some of my friends i can talk about this or that book i read and they'll be like shut up trebek ,and when i talk and use words that i think everyone should know ,and their like huh?? i feel like forcing them to read. i feel like my i.q is slowly shrinking when im around ignorrant ppl. another thing i hate is when they make fun of what i wear becuase i dresss different i dress like kanye and pharrel in a city of ppl who are on 50cent and lloyd banks' dicks . i design my own clothes tho so its not like im exzctly fitting in with anyone...but still ignorrant ppl piss me off and i go to a school with 2,500 of these idiots
  8. WrIot

    WrIot Senior Member

    Joined: Dec 2, 2002 Messages: 1,045 Likes Received: 0
  9. Weapon X

    Weapon X 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Sep 6, 2002 Messages: 14,905 Likes Received: 202
    Haha, muni, too true.

    Maybe I shouldn’t have labeled this as a personal crisis, but it is a problem. I’m well prepared to be diagnosed with the fact that the problem is me, by the way.

    Key3, I just read your post. You make an excellent point. I know that my being interested in all sorts of things helps in the way of my sociability. I have often labeled myself the ‘master mingler’ because no matter who you throw my way, I will be able to find common ground with said person enough to be able to go back to the after party and snort free lines with them.

    Your point about the OCAD thing I sorta follow. I mean, I’ve been to a number of OCAD jams the past couple of years, and believe me, you hit the head of nail.

    I remember I used to chill with some of those poliscience dudes. You know the type, mostly mad left wing, with the token right wing dude who they all call “Fascist Steve”, or whatever. These people seemed to be mad chill. They enjoyed discussing art, science, what have you.. But it turned out that they were all complete phonies. *Plus, never was anything 'not heavy' discussed, like sports or movies or tv, you know?

    I think my main problem is that my brain doesn’t get enough stimulation when I’m out and about. It’s mind numbing, and I’m worried that I’m getting dumber by the day. No matter how many books I read, it’s hard to remember things if I’m not able to relate the things I’ve learnt to people. Hell, that’s a big reason why I’m a 12oz addict. Some of the smartest people I know post here. Really, I think that’s it; the problem. I don’t know, maybe a smart hat and geek shoes should be my fall line.

    Sometimes I wish I had never dropped out of the gifted program and school altogether to pursue a life of crime and drugs. But here’s a jewel you once told me, key, when I was at your place - that it’s better to get it out of the way when you’re young. Upon further reflection, I’ve realized that it’s actually even better. Experiences of any sort are always beneficial.

    I’m not trying to sound stuffy, or anything. I do enjoy the company of my friends, or they wouldn’t be my friends. I’m just worried that the career path I’ve chosen, and the friends that I have will lead me to live a life with an attitude I know is not me.

    So it’s not so much about fitting into a group, it’s more about what’s good for me. If that makes any sense.
  10. Weapon X

    Weapon X 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Sep 6, 2002 Messages: 14,905 Likes Received: 202
    haha, don't get me started. I was reading a goddamn paperback in May, in the cafeteria, and my classmates surrounded me like I was a caged monkey. They thought I must be a genius because I was reading a Puzo.
  11. <KEY3>

    <KEY3> Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 24, 2004 Messages: 6,878 Likes Received: 2
    damn... good memory. better than mine.

    Just like people can go though depressed moods or 'lucky streaks', people can feel surrounded by stupid or immersed in intellignece for a little while, then it all changes.
  12. Weapon X

    Weapon X 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Sep 6, 2002 Messages: 14,905 Likes Received: 202
    haha, and I know I blaze a lot more than you. :D

    but yea, true dat. I just feel like I'm in for a long haul here.
  13. SilentBob

    SilentBob Member

    Joined: Dec 23, 2002 Messages: 683 Likes Received: 1
    I think I'm having your ephiphany early in life... I find I value interlect and general good demeanor ( in the more traditional sense of the word) more and more these days.

    I guess the logical thing for you to do is try and make some new friends, what kind of interlectual interest do you have? For instance do you write anything (on paper)? If so go join a writing workshop or something like that for whatever suits.

    Having said that though I think its good to try and appreciate the friends you do have for their good points. I've found some of my least interlectual friends to posses alot more character than a fair few of my smarter ones.
  14. <KEY3>

    <KEY3> Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 24, 2004 Messages: 6,878 Likes Received: 2
    considering I dont blaze..... actually I've been damn good on the health front lately.

    only one little slip..... and ONE HUGE slip coming up on labour day.
    I'm talking the penthouse at the sutton, peelers, a truck limo and a 'collingwood' worth of skiing.
  15. <KEY3>

    <KEY3> Veteran Member

    Joined: Mar 24, 2004 Messages: 6,878 Likes Received: 2

    just like I said about the friend of mine who's becoming a cop. He isnt a very smart guy in conversation but he's read more classic books than most. He isnt slick enough to pick up a girl or funny enough to charm them. However, if there was one person who I would trust with my life, it would be him. no question.

    I saw a thing on TV where they interviewed five women about intelligence in a potential mate. The first 4 said that the guy has to be smart to have any chance of lasting. The last one said something like 'no... as long as he's honest, loving and compasionate then being really smart doesnt make a difference'. I think that will be the one happily married old woman.