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dog condoms


casekonly

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DOG CONDOMS

 

ya know, i hope ole' 'sparky' thinks to use the ribbed kind, and i hope that mutherfucker turns them inside out when he uses them.

 

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What Sizes and Scents Do They Come In?

 

Dog condoms come in three sizes to fit small, medium, and large breeds. Almost every dog will find a comfortable, well-proportioned condom to meet their needs. The condoms also come in lubricated and meat scented varieties to enhance pleasure for both dog partners.

 

How Effective Are They?

 

Clinical studies are still underway, but we expect them to be about as effective, if used correctly, as human condoms.

 

Can I Train My Dog To Put It On Himself?

 

No, the dog will require human intervention each time he wishes to put on or take off a condom.

 

What About Female Condoms for Bitches?

 

We recognize that birth control is the responsibility of both partners, and we are currently working on a prototype of a condom for female dogs. However, we don't expect it to reach the market until 2007.

 

What About Loss of Sensation?

 

Just like with human condoms, the dog may experience a slight loss of sensation. However, the condoms are made of a very thin latex which should transmit heat well, a key factor in creating a lifelike feel. We are also experimenting with new scents, which work like a "doggy Viagra", providing further sensory stimulation.

 

When and Where Can I Buy Them?

 

We are planning a roll-out for fall 2005 with wide availability at major pet stores and convenience markets by the beginning of 2006.

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Originally posted by MLTf4nt0m+Mar 29 2005, 05:53 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (MLTf4nt0m - Mar 29 2005, 05:53 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-casekonly@Mar 29 2005, 04:46 PM

DOG CONDOMS

 

 

 

Can I Train My Dog To Put It On Himself?

 

No, the dog will require human intervention each time he wishes to put on or take off a condom.

 

 

 

 

well if sparky wants to get down, then that son of a bitch can learn to put it on himself

[/b]

 

 

that's what midgets are for. duh.

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i shouldn't say anything, but damn...i mean, meat flavored condoms shoulda given it away.

 

let your dog out, doo'. nikka don't have to worry about no dog condoms,

 

 

 

 

March 22, 2005

 

Dog Condoms

I just learned while perusing the indispensible Museum of Hoaxes blog that you can now purchase meat-scented condoms for your dog online. "Just as forced sterilization isn't the answer for human population control," announces a blurb on DogCondoms.com, "it's not the solution for dogs. Instead, we should respect dogs' rights as living beings by honoring their instincts and sexuality and provide them with safe, effective birth control."

 

It's a joke, of course — not that any dogs I know are going to get a big whoop out of it.

 

A WHOIS lookup lists the owner of the domain as Pretzel Publishing, which touts itself as a producer of Web sites offering "sex-positive education and humor." Other sites erected by the company include MasturbateForPeace.com and ViagraPhilosophy.com. Visit them at your own risk.

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Guest imported_El Mamerro
Originally posted by casekonly@Mar 29 2005, 06:50 PM

it should be a joke, but what if sparky wants to get him some and he doesn't want the ahssle of puppies and late night calls of 'you my baby daddy'?

 

 

 

Mmmm... puppy assholes.

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Originally posted by El Mamerro+Mar 29 2005, 05:04 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (El Mamerro - Mar 29 2005, 05:04 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-casekonly@Mar 29 2005, 06:50 PM

it should be a joke, but what if sparky wants to get him some and he doesn't want the ahssle of puppies and late night calls of 'you my baby daddy'?

 

 

 

Mmmm... puppy assholes.

[/b]

hahahaha ew dude.

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Originally posted by InfiniteWisdomOfThePezDispenser@Mar 30 2005, 12:47 PM

there's nothing funny about losing half of your dog house because you came in some bitch.

 

 

3f31_troy.jpg

he's right, you know?

 

troy_mcclure.gif

"hi, i'm troy mcclure and i would like to take a moment to talk to you about dog condoms and their effectiveness against the spread of unwwanted puppies. after all, who needs a pregnant bitch when you're just tryin' to get yours?

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i was horrified last night. my mom was watching that new bravo show called something like"dog show moms and dads". they were trying to breed a couple german shepards. they go to the vet, pull out a pastry bag/"artificial vagina" (actual term) AND START JACKING THE DOG OFF. i could have gone a long time without ever seeing that. i was screaming. they had the dog sniffing on the girl dogs ass to get him up. ewwwwwwwwww.

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