Milton Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 Help me think up a good excuse for quitting my job. I have: Going back to school... Got a full time job out of town... Moving out of town with a girl... Going to jail... Getting thrown out of my place, moving back with parents in another state... Help me think of a good one or elaborate on one of these. It needs to be well thought out and bulletproof... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fermentor666 Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 Tell your boss that you have a hemorrhoid the size of a potato and you need to have surgery to get it removed, followed by a long recovery period. Bulletproof. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
26SidedCube Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 Your girlfriend's Ex is trying to kill you and he knows where you work. You've got to flee the state. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
S@T@N Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 "I don't feel like working here anymore." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iloveboxcars Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 Originally posted by S@T@N "I don't feel like working here anymore." exactly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveAustin Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 usually the best excuse is the truth...so Milton...why DO you want to leave? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Peanut Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 "brownie monsters are after me" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
!@#$% Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 sounds like you don't only need to get away from a job, but a person as well, what with all the moving references. what's the deal? i have usually quit jobs to take a better one. my best friend just quit her job to go to bali and the phillipines until late october i quit a job to go to paint louis and i was once fired for failing a drug test tell em you're joining the army. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devilush Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 my hubby uses the "i got locked up...." excuse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weapon X Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 Just stop showing up, then come back asking for a reference a month later Ever seen Eurotrip? Tell them you gave Humphrey the file. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iloveboxcars Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 Originally posted by Devilush my hubby uses the "i got locked up...." excuse. haha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milton Posted June 29, 2004 Author Share Posted June 29, 2004 Im moving in real life, and thats why I'm quitting but I'm moving to go to school and my manager will know if I tell him "I'm movign to go to school" that I've been planning to move since before I was hired and I told him that I was willing to work a year or more... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T=E=A=S=E Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 you said you need help with something to say in reguards to "quitting" your job, quiting refers to leaving without a 2 week notice of your departure from said job in the job world, and if thats the case, just dont go anymore ya knucklehead, im sure they'll get the picture that you quit. However, i strongly advise that you put in a 2 week notice before you quit if you are 18 or older. its a small world out there and people know people who know other mother fuckers. you get what im saying? now, if you meant quit as in put in a 2 week notice and leave the proper way, just say youre putting in your 2 weeks notice (i wrote mine down on a peice of paper to serve as a reminder just recently) and tell them you appreciate all that they have done for you (even if its not true) and that another opportunity has come your way that you couldn't pass up. its that simple. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milton Posted June 29, 2004 Author Share Posted June 29, 2004 Wow... A serious response without a hint of sarcasm... Milton Speechless in Seattle... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T=E=A=S=E Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 didnt see your post before mine, beat me to the punch. in that case, id just tell him it was unexpected, and that you have to go. just say that youre moving for another job that is a better opportunity and you couldnt pass it up. its honestly none of their business. id still put in a 2 weeks notice if i was you but you can quit just the same. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evoke_Me Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 "boss, I've been working here for some time now, and I think its time that I moved on, sorry but I have to quit" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest imported_Tesseract Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 Just tell him you had to get if of your chest...you banged his wife...you're very sorry too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jackson Posted June 30, 2004 Share Posted June 30, 2004 "You didnt get my notice?! Come on! I gave it to you two weeks ago..." "Here it is under your desk, come on! Fix up!" *sleight of hand trick with folded up notice** "See the date... there. Oh man, anyway, I'm sure I am owed some holiday pay..." Done and done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AORAone Posted June 30, 2004 Share Posted June 30, 2004 go to work dont clock in, or however you start the day. wait for your boss to tell you to get to wrok, or go do this or that tell him that you'd be happy too...if you still worked there..haha. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InnerCityRebel Posted June 30, 2004 Share Posted June 30, 2004 Just say some serious family matters came up and you have to leave the state and your not sure how long it is going to take to clear things up.Also add that you don't want to put them out by asking if they can hold the opening for you.If they ask it will be at least 2 to 3 months..after that you should be good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClueTwo Posted June 30, 2004 Share Posted June 30, 2004 Originally posted by fermentor666 Tell your boss that you have a hemorrhoid the size of a potato and you need to have surgery to get it removed, followed by a long recovery period. Bulletproof. Bam dammer... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earmuffs Posted June 30, 2004 Share Posted June 30, 2004 why the fuck do you need a reason to quit.. what is he gonna force you to work there if your reason isnt good enuff? tell him this you: knock knock him: whos there you: FUCK OFF I quit. its that simple Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cultural me Posted June 30, 2004 Share Posted June 30, 2004 i thought its harder to get a job then quit, huh. i must be all bamboozed now adays. say "i lost my car keys so i cant come in anymore" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest krie Posted June 30, 2004 Share Posted June 30, 2004 Tell him you have to have both legs amputated in a few weeks and you wont be able to continue working Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KillWhitey Posted June 30, 2004 Share Posted June 30, 2004 cultural me's is the best one so far Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake Stevens Posted June 30, 2004 Share Posted June 30, 2004 tell your boss you got std's and have to live in an inflatable tent in the middle of the desert.. you can do this over the phone so you dont have to look at him..and its away ya go! you may even get a get well present off him if he believes you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest willy.wonka Posted June 30, 2004 Share Posted June 30, 2004 to work on your career....then just make one up and tell your next job that youre making money. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devilush Posted June 30, 2004 Share Posted June 30, 2004 Originally posted by iloveboxcars haha seriously he has. his employers were calling him (dont work at whole foods) nad one of our best friends picked up the phone for him and was all like "he's in jail. i dont think he will ever come out." imagine her saying that with a thick scottish voice..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gunm Posted June 30, 2004 Share Posted June 30, 2004 Tell your boss you caught AIDS. Jesus, he'll let you go faster than a court does a rich white guy who committed a corporate crime. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Intangible Posted July 1, 2004 Share Posted July 1, 2004 haha im so the best at this......the job i have now i call in probably twice a week........hahahahah my grandfather in my lifetime has died probably like 8 times.....i have so many tricks im like a pimp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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