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Crackheads are fun.


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Guest --zeSto--

this poll is

a. useless

b. mostly useless

c. big time useless

d. all of the above

 

some crack head in Parkdale (local reference) tried to sell

me a duffel bag full of VHS movies. I asked what kind of shit

he had. He said he had about 100 tapes and some of the good stuff

included Jonny Pnemonic Jerry Springer Too hot for TV Rock 'em Sock 'em Hockey 12

obviously all garbage. Those were the bast things he could think of?

I'd rather buy porn

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Easy Zesto, Im trying to bring humor to an overly dull and boring forum. Apparently your ass woke up on the wrong side of the bed, or maybe you just woke up. When you have to live in a place where the crackheads run free like a god dammed pettting zoo you will see the humor in this. If you like I will pay for your prostitute, I can even send you porn so youll be a happy little lad.

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i remember this one time my friends and i were all chillin in front of a club and a crack head tried to sell us christmas lights. it was the christmas season, so obviously he just took it from some business' display window or some other persons decoration. then he starts panhandling "you got a dollar or two" my friend quickly responded "you got any crack?" we all instantly died laughing

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Guest imported_El Mamerro

I loved fucking with the crackheads in San Juan. They'd come and be all honest, like "Yo I need a fix, help a brotha out", and I'd be like, "Ok, but you gotta earn it. Dance for me." And then I'd take a couple of dollar bills out and show them in front of the poor dude... his eyes would light up, and he would just burst into song and dance (the funniest time was when one started singing "Thriller", and even did the good ol' zombie walk). After a good minute of these guys making complete asses of themselves (they don't have much to lose), I would say "Eh, that kinda sucked, man." And I would put my dollars back and give them spare change, hahahaha. They'd just stand there looking sad and I'd just leave. Then after a few minutes I'd come back and give 'em two bucks... they were so goddamn grateful they didn't care I was fucking with them all over the place. One of them once even told me: "When I'm toking up tonight, I'll think of you, man".

 

Nothing has ever quite put a smile on my face like that. Except that one time I had my dick sucked on a beautiful Sunday morning while I slugged tequila straight off the bottle, but that's another story. Beer,

 

El Mamerro

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  • 11 months later...

The other day this crackhead told me he needed for me to:

 

give him some money >> so he could eat >> so he could take his medicine >> because he got bit on the testicles by a spider.

 

I was like, how'd you buy "medicine" if you ain't got no money holmes? Seriously, when I'm downtown, I'll always have like a dollar and a couple of quarters just for the cause. The first couple of bums/crackheads that ask, get donations, the other's I tell, "sorry man, I already gave out all my money, try to be the first to catch me next time and you can have it."

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no, what you do is find a crackhead and tell them that ull give thema tenner (a lot of money for them) if they run fast, head first into a wall. its been done before and will be done again. and its fucking funny

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on my 19th b-day in miami i met a crackhead at 6am and helpedhim gank his dealer for 23 five rocks. then he took me deep in the hood to some appartment where a REAL crackwhore attempted to suckme off.

 

i lived in this house where tweakers used to sneak into the bathroom off the streets to shoot their dirty meth.

 

crazy crackhead lady in the middle of a purchase told me about how saber and his friends camped out for a week to do this big peice in an alley, the dealer got all pissed.

 

when i was askinny little 15 yr old a crackhead took me an my little friends to help fnd a motel in the tederloin(6th and mission area) in SF. we'd been scamming hippies at free tibet and had a grip of cash(for 15 yr olds) in our pockets. all these yellow eyed fiends were eyeing us from their crannies when this little chinese guy walks by with a bunch of styrofoam containers of food. right as he passed us about 3-4 crackheads attacked the food, not necessarily the guy, but the food. we got spooked on the next block and turned back to find them cleaning the sidewalk of any remaining scraps.

 

when i lived in my van crackheads were always lookin for a safe spot to toke, i joined them in miami, key west, gainsville, new orleans, pheonix, LA. whew sad but true. crack is whack, crackheads provide me with endless comical and adventurous memories. great stories to tell your kids, when they grow up of course.

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I love fucking with crackheads porbally the best shit i ever did to one and to a ex girl was i wanted to break up with my girl so i went out and found this crackhead and started talking to him and told him about how i was going to go over this girls house and she was going to buy me lots of crack if she could suck my dick and i would fuck her, then i offered to bring him along, ya shoulda seen his eyes light up at this chance, i brought him over her house had him wait on the front steps while i dumped her told him i had to go to the liquor store and that she was gonna do him first and told him that the crack was hidden in her bra and that he should go in and just whip his dick out....

well from what i heard later on it took her about 45 minutes to get this guy to leave he got completely naked and kept trying to grab her tits to get the crack the best part was she sold drugs so she couldnt call the cops cause if they searched the house she was fucked....

england has crazy crackheads compared to the states..

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Originally posted by bug

i remember this one time my friends and i were all chillin in front of a club and a crack head tried to sell us christmas lights. it was the christmas season, so obviously he just took it from some business' display window or some other persons decoration. then he starts panhandling "you got a dollar or two" my friend quickly responded "you got any crack?" we all instantly died laughing

 

:lol: Once again, ya'll are to fuckin' much. LOL :lol:

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Guest SMUGGLER RSH
Originally posted by spectr

I love fucking with crackheads porbally the best shit i ever did to one and to a ex girl was i wanted to break up with my girl so i went out and found this crackhead and started talking to him and told him about how i was going to go over this girls house and she was going to buy me lots of crack if she could suck my dick and i would fuck her, then i offered to bring him along, ya shoulda seen his eyes light up at this chance, i brought him over her house had him wait on the front steps while i dumped her told him i had to go to the liquor store and that she was gonna do him first and told him that the crack was hidden in her bra and that he should go in and just whip his dick out....

well from what i heard later on it took her about 45 minutes to get this guy to leave he got completely naked and kept trying to grab her tits to get the crack the best part was she sold drugs so she couldnt call the cops cause if they searched the house she was fucked....

england has crazy crackheads compared to the states..

 

If that is true that is one of th funniest break up stories I have ever heard.....HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA

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how bout.....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

:crazy:

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Guest SMUGGLER RSH
Originally posted by •nakone•

how bout.....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

:crazy:

 

What you been smoking boy....CRACK.....Stop sucking on that glass dick

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I get to watch them every morning waiting for the bus. Its my entertainment for the morning. Came home at 3am the other night and some crackhead was just running down the street with a empty cardboard box screaming "GET AWAY FROM MEEEEEE!!!!!! YOU CANT HAVE IT! STOP CHASING MEEEEE!!!!!!!!AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!" the guy was fucking panicked, and there wasnt anyone around remotely close to him, cept us. I felt bad for the guy, he must have been dealing with some serious fucking mental problems. later that night we also got to bomb a small shed (high visibility spot from the train) while a couple of crack heads fucked inside. I love my neighborhood.....

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Originally posted by bug

i remember this one time my friends and i were all chillin in front of a club and a crack head tried to sell us christmas lights. it was the christmas season, so obviously he just took it from some business' display window or some other persons decoration. then he starts panhandling "you got a dollar or two" my friend quickly responded "you got any crack?" we all instantly died laughing

 

OH MY GOD!!!! ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS!!!

 

You're all fucking dorks.

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there very fuck to watch and make fun of and have the do crazy shit for rocks...

 

its hella funny watching them scratch themselfs to now end while looking for somthing that they dont even know there looking for...hahaha

 

the movie star "bling bling" hahahahahah BFK

 

crack heads never die............

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Bummer

 

I don't have any cool crackhead stories. All mine involve locking them in a Seclusion Room and filling out hours of extra paperwork. I hate crack, it causes me extra work. Well, actually it's the paperwork I really hate. I guess I can thank the liberals for that. I think we ought to bring our mentally ill crackheads over to liberal legislators' houses and ring the doorbell. "Ding-dong"

"Yes, can I help you?"

 

"You made secluding this drug addict fucker too much trouble, so he's going to live at YOUR house, okay?"

 

"Whaat? NO! Fuck no! Take him back!"

 

"Can't. And he wants a rock. Got any?"

 

"I don't use CRACK!"

 

"Neither do I, but Billy Bob here needs a rock, or he's going to go crazy right here in your living room."

 

"Okay, okay, here's a hundred bucks, now get his stinky ass out of my house."

 

"Cool. This will just about cover my overtime. YO, BILLY. Here's twenty bucks. Get lost."

 

"Yeee-Hah! Later, muthafuckas!"

 

"Shit. Now that's what I call effective psychotherapy."

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Guest SMUGGLER RSH

Re: Bummer

 

Originally posted by KaBar

I don't have any cool crackhead stories. All mine involve locking them in a Seclusion Room and filling out hours of extra paperwork. I hate crack, it causes me extra work. Well, actually it's the paperwork I really hate. I guess I can thank the liberals for that. I think we ought to bring our mentally ill crackheads over to liberal legislators' houses and ring the doorbell. "Ding-dong"

"Yes, can I help you?"

 

"You made secluding this drug addict fucker too much trouble, so he's going to live at YOUR house, okay?"

 

"Whaat? NO! Fuck no! Take him back!"

 

"Can't. And he wants a rock. Got any?"

 

"I don't use CRACK!"

 

"Neither do I, but Billy Bob here needs a rock, or he's going to go crazy right here in your living room."

 

"Okay, okay, here's a hundred bucks, now get his stinky ass out of my house."

 

"Cool. This will just about cover my overtime. YO, BILLY. Here's twenty bucks. Get lost."

 

"Yeee-Hah! Later, muthafuckas!"

 

"Shit. Now that's what I call effective psychotherapy."

 

AHAHAHAHA that is some crazy psycho nurse solve all the governments problems idea.......

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Originally posted by FIST2CUFFS

http://www.unreal.zp.ua/fuck.gif'>

stop trying to get your fuckin posts up by being gay and putting that in every fuckin thread..... god whats this obsession with kids and wanting high post counts.... o yea well i told my drunken bum story in some talking to people on the bus thread awhile back and it was to long to retype
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