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College Academic BS

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by Gunm, Nov 24, 2003.

  1. Gunm

    Gunm Banned

    Joined: Aug 31, 2003 Messages: 12,427 Likes Received: 2
    The thing I "love" about college are these assinine writing guidelines some of the professeors make me deal with.

    For instance, I had to write a paper on groundwater contamination by arsenic....six pages of bullshit i don't even care about. i drink bottled water exclusively.

    Anyway, we have to use a variety of sources for info but what is the most irritating is that we actually have to trek to the library and use two published sources for every internet website we use for citations.

    WTF? At my fingertips is all the information I need to write an informative and stimulating paper. Why do i need to go and manually look it up? It's because my instructors belief that through this sort of academic indentured servitude that I'll truly learn to appreciate the value of a "well researched paper".

    What they don't appreciate is the fact that I see this as a waste of my fucking time. It's like telling someone...."Yeah, there's this faucet you can just turn on for water to satisfy your thirst but instead, I wanna make you walk two miles down to the river to get water instead"

    And man, what a lame thing to have to write about. First they said hot dogs were killing me and now they wanna terrifiy me about water....Shit.
  2. Dr. Dazzle

    Dr. Dazzle Veteran Member

    Joined: Nov 19, 2001 Messages: 8,147 Likes Received: 3
    I remember being so high, that I wrote an entire paper on Death of a Salesman referring to the main character by the wrong name throughout....

    My teacher didn't see the funny side :eek:
  3. effyoo

    effyoo Elite Member

    Joined: Sep 2, 2002 Messages: 4,703 Likes Received: 0
    I understand you point and actually empathize with it, but this being 12oz you know this is going to dissolve into a debate about which bottled water is best.

    So, I'll nip it in the bud and say:


    Besides, all your work and research will build character as well as provide you with an endless anount of anecdotes and knowledge that the 'intelligencia' will appreciate.
  4. Daddy Screw

    Daddy Screw Member

    Joined: Jun 15, 2002 Messages: 551 Likes Received: 29
    they probably tryin to piss you off. You should leave man.
  5. Milton

    Milton Senior Member

    Joined: May 21, 2003 Messages: 2,253 Likes Received: 0
    I actually see the point in this, but fear retribution...
  6. Poop Man Bob

    Poop Man Bob Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Nov 16, 2000 Messages: 10,259 Likes Received: 18
    Personally, I prefer fine bottled water.
  7. sneak

    sneak Guest

    best bottled water: http://www.yesmommy.co.kr/event/evian/img01/pr04.gif'>

    i agree lens. its complete crap but thats life and we have to do it. i think the main thinking behind the idea is that you learn the "value" of doing research...
  8. Kr430n5_666

    Kr430n5_666 Banned

    Joined: Oct 6, 2004 Messages: 19,229 Likes Received: 30
    I'd rather have a beanbag monster.
  9. Telo

    Telo Elite Member

    Joined: Jun 3, 2003 Messages: 4,164 Likes Received: 37
    bottled water is bottled water. its all the fucking same.
  10. newmark

    newmark New Jack

    Joined: Aug 19, 2003 Messages: 63 Likes Received: 0
    its all bottled by a guy in pittsburgh in his bathtub filling the bottles up.
  11. TEARZ

    TEARZ Guest

    i agree with your professor homey.

    a good paper should draw from many different types of sources. you also have got to realize, that to most serious academics, a paper citing only internet sources will be seen as "suspect." that's just the way it is.

    i think the "lesson" he or she is trying to teach you is one of diversity of sources.

    as far as it being a pain in your ass, i feel you. but school is pretty much a self-imposed pain in the ass.
  12. gfreshsushi

    gfreshsushi Senior Member

    Joined: Sep 21, 2003 Messages: 2,244 Likes Received: 1
    am i the only one that knows you can access periodicals and books online? all you have to do when making a works cited page is format it like you held the book. if you're missing info, just fucking make it up! i haven't set foot in a library in 2.5 years of college. none of your teachers will check your shit, they just tell you that to scare you.

    of course, if you're in grad school, i wouldn't risk it. those bastards will read your garbage if you cite it as a source.
  13. suburbian bum

    suburbian bum 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Jan 30, 2001 Messages: 14,673 Likes Received: 3

    El mejor. Que bueno.
  14. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Veteran Member

    Joined: Jul 12, 2000 Messages: 6,979 Likes Received: 2
    Willy Lowman and his son is Biff Lowman.
    I haven't read the book in like 8 years but I remeber that.

    and yeah... grad school people have months of book work and
    anything you site will be looked over during some form of dissertation.
  15. yoink

    yoink Elite Member

    Joined: May 27, 2002 Messages: 3,428 Likes Received: 0