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Tyler Durden

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i know i shouldnt have started another thread for this, but whatever. heres a quote that pretty much sums up my situation with girls.

 

“And he’s a terrible dancer.”

Right now, me getting killed would be redundant.

“And his teeth are weird, not rotten, but crooked and little.”

You could stab a knife right through my heart and you’d be too late.

“And he has these gross little monkey hands.”

Right now, getting killed would be a breath of spring.

“That’s supposed to mean he has a little wiener dick.”

If Fertility keeps talking, my caseworker will have one less client in the morning.

“And he’s not obese,” Fertility says, “he’s not a whale, but he’s too fat for me.”

In case there’s a sniper outside, I open the blinds and stand my gross obese body in the window. Please, anybody with a rifle and a scope. Shoot me right here. Right in my big fat heart. Right in my little wiener.

“He’s not anything like you,” Fertility says.

Oh, I think she’d be surprised how much we’re alike.

“You’re so mysterious.”

I ask, if she could change any one thing about this guy at the mausoleum, what would it be?

“Just so he’d quit pestering me,” she says, “I’d kill him.”

Well, she’s not alone there. Be my guest. Take a number, and stand in line.

 

oh happy days...this is my life.

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Guest imported_Tesseract

<span style='color:royalblue'>"His name is robert polsen" </span>

<span style='color:blue'>"His name is robert polsen" </span>

<span style='color:darkblue'>"His name is robert polsen" </span>

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