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Cats are yummy

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by Smart, Jun 14, 2001.

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  1. Smart

    Smart Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Apr 14, 2000 Messages: 17,017 Likes Received: 178
  2. willy!wonka

    willy!wonka Senior Member

    Joined: May 20, 2001 Messages: 2,419 Likes Received: 3
    dude.....what was that?
  3. Smart

    Smart Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Apr 14, 2000 Messages: 17,017 Likes Received: 178
    yo, I got some freaky links... remeber the kitty enema story? it was illustrated w/ crayons...

    2 Can Sam
  4. T.T Boy

    T.T Boy Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: May 18, 2001 Messages: 21,803 Likes Received: 41
    that shit is sick.. i dont get it, what is the finished product??? a dead square cat?

    tell me what happens to the cat..

    who let the dogs out?
  5. ubejinxed

    ubejinxed Veteran Member

    Joined: Apr 12, 2001 Messages: 7,543 Likes Received: 3
    "Sometimes, when an individual living alone dies unexpectedly, several days may pass before anyone takes notice. Some of these individuals may own a dog or a cat, which will go unfed. In my experience, a dog may go for several days before finally resorting to eating the owner's body. A cat, on the other hand, will only wait a day or two. "

    watch your cat

    high plains drifter
  6. garcia_vega

    garcia_vega Elite Member

    Joined: Jan 6, 2001 Messages: 2,931 Likes Received: 2
    hahaha! that's great! i hate cats and believe they should be tortured and eaten because i'm allergic to them.
  7. that shit is disgusting. you fuckers.
  8. Fox Mulder

    Fox Mulder 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Nov 23, 2000 Messages: 12,434 Likes Received: 86
    it's not their fault you have a weak immune system...
  9. Face Me Face Death

    Face Me Face Death Member

    Joined: Nov 3, 2000 Messages: 536 Likes Received: 1
    thats fucking gross...its pretty bad if I think something is gross...who the fuck would want a cat in a box anyways...I don't want a geometrically shaped cat.
  10. theFUME

    theFUME Senior Member

    Joined: Mar 6, 2001 Messages: 2,489 Likes Received: 1
    thats pretty funny

    "So analyze me surprise me but cant magmatize me"
  11. Devilush

    Devilush 12oz Legend

    Joined: Feb 1, 2001 Messages: 17,035 Likes Received: 3
    you are an asshole for posting this shit! fuck you and your stupid ass morbid bonsai kitten site! and for those of you who think that shit is funny, fuck off! isn't this a form of animal abuse? man,seriously, those people should go to hell because that is the worst that i've seen. i'm gonna go home now and hug pablo the graf cat. fuckers.
  12. willy!wonka

    willy!wonka Senior Member

    Joined: May 20, 2001 Messages: 2,419 Likes Received: 3
    i feel ya devilush...i love cats..i sit with my cat and listen to every sound that is in the air...my cat is the fucking shit...attacks people that brings bad vibes...a true warrior..
  13. Devilush

    Devilush 12oz Legend

    Joined: Feb 1, 2001 Messages: 17,035 Likes Received: 3
    fuck yea...my cat is crazy too! he likes to play fetch(???), wakes me up in the morning (my living alarm clock), when i'm sad, he knows. so fuck off fuckers!(..not you willy, face me face death, pilau, serkoff, and t.t. boy.)
  14. Raels

    Raels Member

    Joined: Mar 9, 2001 Messages: 903 Likes Received: 0
    Smart .. I came across this on the guest book of that site ..

    Little did we know, that somehow, somewhere, she had come across information about the art of kitten bonsai and had decided it was the solution to her problems. (I don't think it was your web site that she got the information from, as this was several years ago and I presume predated the creation of your site.) She placed the kitten in a 1 qt mason jar, taking care to provide breathing and feeding tubes. She correctly super glued the kitten's rectum. Sadly, her vocabulary was not sufficiently developed to understand the meaning of "rectal diverticulum" and hence she did not realize anything was amiss when this failed to occur.

    From what we have been able to gather from talking to her after the tragic accident, all seemed to be going well for the first month or so. The kitten had fully and evenly filled the confinement vessel. Then, one evening, wishing to "play" with her pet, she picked up the container. Apparently, the internal pressure had reached the bursting point and the slight jar of being picked up caused it to explode, hurtling glass shrapnel in all directions. My beautiful young daughter lost three fingers on her right hand, was blinded in her left eye and left with a long jagged scar across her left cheek. One minute a cheerleader and one of the most popular girls in her class - the next, a disfigured outcast.

    The healing process was long and painful and the hospital costs soon exceeded the limits of our insurance coverage and became a financial burden. When she graduated, it quickly became clear it wasn't going to be any easier for her to find employment than it was going to be for her to attract a husband. She finally found work at Disneyland, as the greeter for the Pirates of the Caribbean ride, but only after having her left leg amputated at the knee. (Another expensive consequence of this tragedy. We had to go all the way to Laos to find a "doctor" who was willing to amputate a healthy limb attached to a teenage girl. Then complications set in, the hospital bill went through the roof and our hapless child had to work off her treatment bills at a local brothel. It was a trying 16 months for us all.)

    So the next time you are at Disneyland with your children and see a peg-legged, one-eyed pirate named Bambi, tell them, "That could be how you end up if you fool around with kitten bonsai."

    I hope this will serve as a warning to all the young readers at your site who may be tempted to "experiment." And please, for the sake of the children, don't be so forth-coming about the actual techniques used in creating these art pets. Something so whimsical and delightful shouldn't be allowed to turn into a life altering tragedy for another unsuspecting family.

    [This message has been edited by Raels (edited 06-14-2001).]
  15. TOY

    TOY New Jack

    Joined: May 16, 2001 Messages: 2 Likes Received: 0
    what the fuck?
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