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Bonsai Kitten BS

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by oOsoupOo, Jun 15, 2001.

  1. oOsoupOo

    oOsoupOo Senior Member

    Joined: Nov 30, 2000 Messages: 1,915 Likes Received: 0
    I emailed some people and got the hook ups...

    an email from a friend :

    by Declan McCullagh
    10:10 a.m. Feb. 9, 2001 PST

    WASHINGTON -- A website devoted to squishing kittens into Mason jars is
    one of two things: A
    trenchant parody designed to provoke, or a nefarious kitty-mutilation
    scheme that must be
    stopped, and probably outlawed. Count the FBI among the many visitors to

    bonsaikitten.com who
    are anything but amused at the descriptions of how to use muscle
    relaxant, feeding tubes and
    Klein bottles to shape a perfect Bonsai Cat.

    FBI agents in the Boston field office have launched an investigation
    into the site. They also
    have served MIT with a grand jury subpoena asking for "any and all
    subscriber information"
    about the site, which was initially hosted in a campus dormitory but has

    since moved to a
    commercial provider.

    MIT said in a letter to bonsaikitten.com's pseudonymous webmaster, a
    graduate student using
    the alias Dr. Michael Wong Chang, that it will wait until Sunday to turn

    over records that
    would identify him by name. "I was surprised," Chang said. "I really
    thought that the FBI had
    better things to do. That's your tax dollars at work."

    Bonsaikitten.com is, of course, a joke devised by prankster MIT students

    -- who else would talk
    about "rectilinear kittens?" -- to provoke owners of kittens, an
    adorably fuzzy topic that's
    usually beyond parody.

    Bonsaikitten.com offers to sell visitors a custom-shaped kitten -- the
    site says "typical wait
    time for a fully shaped Bonsai Kitten is 3 to 4 months" -- but the site
    does not list prices or
    a mailing address for where to send money orders. It does, however,
    occasionally receive
    requests for more information. It also has sparked tens of thousands of
    hate-mail messages,
    anti-Bonsai Kitten groups on Yahoo, and even a blistering denunciation
    from the venerable
    Humane Society of the United States.

    For the site's fans, watching e-mail nastygrams arrive has become a kind

    of spectator sport:
    There's even a mailing list that lets bonsaikitten.com aficionados view
    any mail sent to the
    site's webmaster.

    A typical message: "This site is horrible! You should go in a mental
    hospital! You son of a
    bitch! I'll do my best to shut down this site and your disgusting
    hobby!" A gun-toting
    investigator from the Massachusetts Society for the Prevention of
    Cruelty to Animals reportedly
    stopped by campus and quizzed MIT network administrators about the
    intent of the site. Under
    state law, MSPCA investigators are deputized as "special state police
    officers" with
    investigation and arrest abilities.

    The combined efforts of animal rights proponents, including such ardent
    activists as the
    closed-subscription "meowmies" group, seem to have prompted the FBI to
    launch its
    investigation. "Why are they doing this?" asks Harvey Silverglate, a
    prominent Boston criminal
    defense attorney. "I think the answer is that political correctness has
    infected the FBI." "The
    kind of fanatical end of the spectrum animal protection movement has
    affected them," says
    Silverglate, a partner at Silverglate and Good. "They want to be the
    good guys. They massively
    run rampant over Americans' liberties but they want to be seen as nice
    fuzzy guys who want to
    protect kittens." Silverglate predicts that when the FBI realizes
    bonsaikitten.com is not
    serious, the bureau will quietly abandon its investigation.

    Ellen Kearns, an FBI agent in the bureau's Lakeville, Massachusetts
    office who is involved in
    the investigation, could not be reached for comment. Nadine Pellegrini,
    the assistant U.S.
    Attorney who signed the subpoena, refused to discuss the investigation.
    "I'm making no
    comment," Pellegrini said.

    The subpoena does not discuss what law the bonsaikitten.com operators
    allegedly violated. But
    Pellegrini hinted that it was based on a relatively recent federal
    statute: "I would assume
    there's a case, if there's a law, but I'm not making any comment." In
    December 1999, President
    Clinton signed a law that makes it a federal felony to possess "a
    depiction of animal cruelty"
    with the intent to distribute across state lines -- such as on the

    During a floor debate, Rep. Elton Gallegly (R-Calif.) claimed that "sick

    criminals are taking
    advantage of the loopholes in the local law and the lack of federal law
    on animal cruelty
    videos." The law, which observers at the time said probably violated the

    First Amendment, only
    applies to images, videos, and sound recordings that are distributed
    "for commercial gain" --
    and bonsaikitten.com's tongue-in-cheek descriptions of mail-order cats
    in bottles appears to
    have given the FBI sufficient justification for an investigation.

    The national Humane Society, based in Washington, applauded the FBI's
    efforts. "If the FBI is
    looking into this, that's great," said spokeswoman Karen Allanach.
    "Anything to discourage
    animal cruelty would be very helpful. Allanach said she's not sure if
    the site is a parody --
    and even if it isn't, it should be taken offline because it could
    encourage people to
    experiment on their own household pets. "It's totally promoting animal
    cruelty," Allanach said.
    "They consider it a sick joke. People will take it seriously. Animal
    cruelty is not funny.
    Animal torture is not funny. We would like bonsaikitten.com to be
    removed permanently."

    When asked whether someone has the First Amendment right to advocate for

    animal cruelty,
    Allanach replied: "That's a great question. That's at the heart of a lot

    of debate." Jered
    Floyd, a recent MIT graduate, says animal rights activists -- who have
    successfully pressured
    hosting services to ban bonsaikitten.com until rotten.com offered it
    server space -- don't have
    a sense of humor. "The First Amendment protects all speech, no matter
    how offensive some people
    may find it," Floyd says. "The site is clearly a humorous endeavor. The
    fact that a number of
    people seem to have very little sense of humor isn't relevant."

    A letter dated Feb. 1 from MIT lawyer Jeff Swope says that federal law
    requires the university
    to notify students when it receives subpoenas for information about
    them. It says that
    "pursuant to that legal process, MIT will produce such information, no
    earlier than Feb. 11,

    also see:
  2. -Rage-

    -Rage- 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Apr 12, 2001 Messages: 11,276 Likes Received: 71
  3. PIRone716

    PIRone716 Member

    Joined: Jun 5, 2001 Messages: 837 Likes Received: 1
    i mean yeah thats fucked up,but can't people take a fucking joke anymore ?

    your ghetto if you pee in the shower...
  4. willy!wonka

    willy!wonka Senior Member

    Joined: May 20, 2001 Messages: 2,419 Likes Received: 3
    I signed thier guestbook like I admired them in every way...I told them I had a collection of over fifty cats and the one that look ugly i bury...
    I lead them to believe I was serious and that i used to run over buried to thier head cats with my lawn mowwer...
    then I lead them to believe I was a total phsyco and how they are just like me in a sence....
    It was a mutalated story...hope they see the madness of it all.
  5. willy!wonka

    willy!wonka Senior Member

    Joined: May 20, 2001 Messages: 2,419 Likes Received: 3

    some things arent funny......
    well unless of course you're sick...
  6. Ski Mask

    Ski Mask 12oz Loyalist

    Joined: Apr 11, 2000 Messages: 11,114 Likes Received: 209
    I realize its a joke...but shit...who finds that funny? what kind of person sits around and goes "hey! I know what I'll do for a joke...I'll make a fake website for a company that sells dead kittens formed into the shape of a jar! that should get alot of laughs!" I dont get that kind of absolutely tasteless humor....anyone wanna help me out?
  7. PIRone716

    PIRone716 Member

    Joined: Jun 5, 2001 Messages: 837 Likes Received: 1
    some people are just fucked like that.i thought it was sick and was wondering where the fuck,they would get an idea like that.but nevertheless its a joke,a sick one.i understand what you are sayin though.i guess it just takes a really fucked person to do something like that...

    your ghetto if you pee in the shower...

    [This message has been edited by PIRone716 (edited 06-15-2001).]
  8. they were MIT students. of course they would do this. college kids with lots of intelligence and lots of money. a good situation to suggest certain ideas and imagery and provoke people with it.

  9. platapie

    platapie Guest

    willy the police are gonna knock your fucking door down. hahahahahahaa. hide the kiddie porn.
  10. AeRoS0ul

    AeRoS0ul Member

    Joined: May 2, 2001 Messages: 538 Likes Received: 0
    Is it by any chance a protest/parady for twisty cats ? (this is really who the FBI should go after) They intentionally breed cats to have a gene which changes the shape of the cats feet. lemmie see if i can scrounge some pics.
  11. AeRoS0ul

    AeRoS0ul Member

    Joined: May 2, 2001 Messages: 538 Likes Received: 0
    And ive seen worse on tv. thats not even that big of a defect
  12. Face Me Face Death

    Face Me Face Death Member

    Joined: Nov 3, 2000 Messages: 536 Likes Received: 1
  13. willy!wonka

    willy!wonka Senior Member

    Joined: May 20, 2001 Messages: 2,419 Likes Received: 3

    hahahaha....how did you know of my kiddie porn?!
  14. Smart

    Smart Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Apr 14, 2000 Messages: 17,017 Likes Received: 178
    Oh... I always thought you were talking about KITTY PORN...

    2 Can Sam