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bible stories with Willy Wonka

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by willy.wonka, Jun 27, 2002.

  1. willy.wonka

    willy.wonka Guest

    Mt 1:18, Lk 1:26
    This is how Jesus Christ came to be born. In the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent by God to a town called Nazareth...
    Lk 1:27-28
    ...to a virgin betrothed to a man named Joseph, of the House of David; and the virgin's name was Mary. He went in and said to her, 'Rejoice, you who enjoy God's favour!'
    Lk 1:29
    She was deeply disturbed by these words and asked herself what this greeting could mean.
    Lk 1:31
    But the angel said to her, 'Look! You are to conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you must name him Jesus.'
    Lk 1:34
    Mary said to the angel, 'But how can this come about, since I have no knowledge of a man?
    Lk 1:35
    The angel answered, 'The Holy Spirit will come upon you.'
    Lk 1:38
    And the angel left her.
    Mt 1:18
    Mary...was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit.
    Mt 1:19
    Her husband Joseph, being an upright man and wanting to spare her disgrace, decided to divorce her informally.
    Mt 1:20-21
    Lk 2:1-5
    Now it happened at this time Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be made of the whole inhabited world...and everyone went to be registered, each to his own town. So Joseph set out from the town of Nazareth in Galilee, to David's town called Bethlehem, since he was of David's house and line, in order to be registered together with Mary, his betrothed, who was with child.
    Lk 2:6-7, Mt 1:25
    Now it happened that, while they were there, the time came for her to have her child, and she gave birth to a son, her first-born. He had not had intercourse with his wife when she gave birth to a son; and he named him Jesus.
    Lk 2:7
    She wrapped him in swaddling clothes and laid him in a manger because there was no room for them in the inn.
  2. Daddy_Screw

    Daddy_Screw Guest


    "hell yeah I tapped that ass!!!"
  3. Matthew13

    Matthew13 Member

    Joined: Jun 6, 2002 Messages: 290 Likes Received: 0
    willy wonka...i don't know if you made that or what, but it was the coolest thing...easily... i have seen all day, my hat goes off to you.

  4. willy.wonka

    willy.wonka Guest

    couldnt wait,could you....

    Lk 2:8
    In the countryside close by there were shepherds out in the fields keeping guard over their sheep during the watches of the night.
    Lk 2:9
    An angel of the Lord stood over them and the glory of the Lord shone round them. They were terrified.
    Lk 2:10-12
    But the angel said, 'Do not be afraid. Today in the town of David a Saviour has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. And here is a sign for you: you will find a baby wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger.'
    Lk 2:13
    And all at once with the angel there was a great throng of the hosts of heaven, praising God with the words: 'Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace for those he favours.'

    Lk 2:16
    So they hurried away...

    JIGSAW Guest

    where the fuck did you find this.....(I had that ghost lego as a kid)
  6. willy.wonka

    willy.wonka Guest

    Lk 2:16
    ...and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby lying in the manger.
    Lk 2:17
    When they saw the child they repeated what they had been told about him, and everyone who heard it was astonished at what the shepherds said to them.
    Mt 2:1
    After Jesus had been born at Bethlehem in Judea during the reign of King Herod, suddenly some wise men came to Jerusalem from the east asking 'Where is the infant king of the Jews? We saw his star as it rose and have come to do him homage.'
    Mt 2:3
    When King Herod heard this he was perturbed, and so was the whole of Jerusalem.
    Mt 2:4-5
    He called together all the chief priests and scribes of the people, and enquired of them where the Christ was to be born. They told him, 'At Bethlehem in Judea.'
    Mt 2:7
    Then he summoned the wise men to see him privately. He...sent them on to Bethlehem with the words, 'Go and find out all about the child, and when you have found him, let me know, so that I too may go and do him homage.'
  7. willy.wonka

    willy.wonka Guest

    Mt 2:8
    Having listened to what the king had to say, they set out. And suddenly the star they had seen rising went forward and halted over the place where the child was.
    Mt 2:10-11
    The sight of the star filled them with delight, and going into the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary.
    Mt 2:11
    And falling to their knees they did him homage. Then, opening their treasures, they offered him gifts of gold and frankincense and myrrh.
    Mt 2:12
    But they were given a warning in a dream not to go back to Herod, and returned to their country by a different way.
  8. willy.wonka

    willy.wonka Guest

    Mt 2:13
    After they had left, suddenly the angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said, 'Get up, take the child and his mother with you, and escape into Egypt, and stay there until I tell you, because Herod intends to do away with him.'
    Mt 2:14-15
    So Joseph got up and, taking the child and his mother with him, left that night for Egypt, where he stayed until Herod was dead.
    Mt 2:16
    Herod was furious on realising that he had been fooled by the wise men.
    Mt 2:16
    And in Bethlehem and its surrounding districts he had all the male children killed who were two years old or less.
    Mt 2:19-20
    After Herod's death, suddenly the angel of the Lord appeared in a dream to Joseph in Egypt and said, 'Get up, take the child and his mother with you and go back to the land of Israel, for those who wanted to kill the child are dead.'
  9. willy.wonka

    willy.wonka Guest

    Mt 2:21
    So Joseph got up and, taking the child and his mother with him, went back to the land of Israel.
    Mt 2:22
    But when he learnt that Archelaus had succeeded his father Herod as ruler of the Judea he was afraid to go there, and being warned in a dream he withdrew to the region of Galilee. There he settled in a town called Nazareth. In this way the words spoken through the prophets were to be fulfilled: He will be called a Nazarene.

    - The End -
  10. willy.wonka

    willy.wonka Guest

  11. beardo

    beardo Guest

    this is the funniest fucking thing i have ever seen

    i cant even laugh hard enough so im not laughing at all

    i am beside myself in humorous amazement

    peace be with you wonka.

  12. yoink

    yoink Elite Member

    Joined: May 27, 2002 Messages: 3,428 Likes Received: 0
    genius pure damn genius....

    this thread is great!
  13. platapie

    platapie Guest

    a breath of fresh air has just been let into channel zero........
  14. Kr430n5_666

    Kr430n5_666 Banned

    Joined: Oct 6, 2004 Messages: 19,229 Likes Received: 30
  15. Stapler

    Stapler Guest

    Man either you are a disturbed individual with to much time on there hands and you custom painted your own leog charectors or you got bored and actually found them on the lego site. Either way it was funny, tha baby looks retarded but hey who cares funny shit.