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Being sober for the rest of your life...


Dirty_habiT

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I, up until a couple days ago, was clean since Januaray 11th.... but I had been drinking like a fish. My friend made me a bet a little more than a week ago that I couldn't go a week without drinking. I did it and it was harder than I thought. So then the other day, I am not sure what happened but my will power was weakened. I smoked and felt like a real ass about it. So like before I don't desire to do that stuff anymore, or any other stuff... it makes me no bueno to be around. I thought since I had gone so long that I had it made and that stuff would never mess with my life again. I was wrong, I hate addiction. Anyhow, so after the bet with my friend was over, I decided that it was time to catch up.... well I had a couple drinks the other night and ended up fighting with my girlfriend.... which is what always happens. We had so many less fights the week that I didn't drink. So now I'm deciding that I have to give up drinking also. It's a condition of my probation anyhow, for me to be completely clean and not drink.

 

The other day I drank one beer.... one beer. I wasn't drunk, I didn't feel the effects of the alcohol, but that week of being sober made it easy for me to realise that the alcohol had changed my thinking.... just from one beer. I become an asshole, a different person. It's unhealthy. Now the part I need help with.... there's not many options for entertainment when all you've relied on for so long is mind altering substances. I don't hang out with any of the people I used to, I am trying to find new friends that engage in worthwhile activities. It's not easy, everyone seems to be escaping from reality one way or the other. Being ignorant gets old quick.

 

I was wondering if any of you have ever battled addiction and won, what helped you... what'd you do to occupy yourself? Getting bored is your downfall when dealing with this. Please don't erase this thread, I'm not trying to discuss subjects that I know aren't supposed to be talked of here. I'm turning to my fellow 12ozers for the good advice.

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I doubt I'll be sober for the rest of my life, although I am definately trying to calm down on the alcohol. I'm trying to drink only on weekends.. instead of every day. I don't have the being an asshole problem when I get drunk.. atleast I don't think I do. Most people can't tell when I'm drunk as opposed to sober, so I might just have the being an asshole problem all the time, or never.

 

 

In a perfect world, I wouldn't drink another drop in my life.

 

err.

 

Good luck to you man, I hope you get off the sauce.

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Originally posted by Dirty_habiT@Apr 1 2005, 05:24 PM

I, up until a couple days ago, was clean since Januaray 11th.... but I had been drinking like a fish. My friend made me a bet a little more than a week ago that I couldn't go a week without drinking. I did it and it was harder than I thought. So then the other day, I am not sure what happened but my will power was weakened. I smoked and felt like a real ass about it. So like before I don't desire to do that stuff anymore, or any other stuff... it makes me no bueno to be around. I thought since I had gone so long that I had it made and that stuff would never mess with my life again. I was wrong, I hate addiction. Anyhow, so after the bet with my friend was over, I decided that it was time to catch up.... well I had a couple drinks the other night and ended up fighting with my girlfriend.... which is what always happens. We had so many less fights the week that I didn't drink. So now I'm deciding that I have to give up drinking also. It's a condition of my probation anyhow, for me to be completely clean and not drink.

 

The other day I drank one beer.... one beer. I wasn't drunk, I didn't feel the effects of the alcohol, but that week of being sober made it easy for me to realise that the alcohol had changed my thinking.... just from one beer. I become an asshole, a different person. It's unhealthy. Now the part I need help with.... there's not many options for entertainment when all you've relied on for so long is mind altering substances. I don't hang out with any of the people I used to, I am trying to find new friends that engage in worthwhile activities. It's not easy, everyone seems to be escaping from reality one way or the other. Being ignorant gets old quick.

 

I was wondering if any of you have ever battled addiction and won, what helped you... what'd you do to occupy yourself? Getting bored is your downfall when dealing with this. Please don't erase this thread, I'm not trying to discuss subjects that I know aren't supposed to be talked of here. I'm turning to my fellow 12ozers for the good advice.

 

 

i don't like revealing to much about my self to people i don't know, but i have been without drugs and alcohol for 3 years, by the age of 18 when i stoped, i had become a junkie, i had been homeless before, pulled guns on people to get what what i thought i needed, and nobody trusted me, i was looking at death at around 20 or 21. by the end of my carrer as an addict and alcoholic, when i finally decided to get clean, i looked like bruce willis at the end of the die hard movies.

 

for me personally getting sober was not something i wanted to do i had to do it or i was dead, i probally deserve to be. i had to get help. i did. life is butter.

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The Leader:

 

Yeah, that thing about people not knowing if you're drunk or sober, that's the thing with me too.... when I was drinking really heavily the past couple months, I could drink and drink and drink.... and not throw up or be cross eyed or anything. It got to where I couldn't get to where i was trying to get to with alcohol.... and people wouldn't know if I was drunk or not, and mostly that ended with them assuming I was drunk. It's hard to tell if you are better without alcohol without staying away from it for a while. I have to go to a treatment program for probation and they tell me that you CANNOT control your drinking. Like that drinking on the weekends thing won't work in the long run. Some, very few, people can get away with doing that, but most of us... no. There's also those who stop drinking liquor and stick to beer, that doesn't work either. Statistics say that sooner or later you'll fuck up. You could get away with being at parties and not fighting or driving home drunk a million times, but it's the one time that you get caught that's gonna hurt. Anyhow, I hope the replies keep comin.

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I've drank myself to the point where my body had a chemical dependency. I kicked that and didn't drink for a while, but I am drinking again in moderation. I think the key word here is exactly that, moderation. Too much or too little of something is unhealthy in my opinion.

 

People tend to take things overboard in both positive and negative ways.

 

oh yeah, I realize full on alcoholics aren't ever going to be able to go back to a minimal social drinking status.

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the question is dude if you are happy? simple. are you satisfied with your life? and if not, and drinking and your dissatisfaction seem to go hand in hand then maybe you should do something about it, but if these problems are simply normal human misfortunes then alcohol is not to blame.

 

i leave you with this:

an old wise man told me once that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over but expecting a different result.

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Thankfully, I don't have any addictive tendencies or an addictive "personality" to be vague. Point is, the only thing that i'm addicted to is, literally, money. haha. I must have it. All the time. I can drink drink drink, ok i'm drunk, now i'm asleep, I wake up, where the money at. I couldn't care less about drinking, smoking (green, cigs are fucking nasty), harder drugs (which I don't do at all), all that shit, to the point of forming an addiction. This is mostly due to my having a healthy self-esteem. Drinking and smoking, and the addictions that come from them, are often signs of poor/unhealthy self-esteem.

 

I'm by far an expert on the subject of self-esteem, as I am but a student on this myself, but a man by the name of Nathaniel Branden is an expert. And I **highly highly** recommend this book to anyone that is looking for a solid foundation to build upon.

 

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detai...=books&n=507846

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my friend was trying to stop smoking and was on his way to recovery when he gave in last night at poker night. i don't know, i've never had to deal with an addiction really (atleast not with drugs or drinking) those things should be done in adequate amounts, used to relax once in awhile and not to be done all the time because it's the only thing you can do that's "fun" (in my opinion). Don't get me wrong though, i love getting wasted and the feeling you get, but i don't need to feel that every night to enjoy myself.

 

as far as things to do to help you quit drinking and smoking or whatever else you want to quit, i'd say switching up your friends as well as getting more involved with different hobbies or whatever else you might be interested in learning would help significantly. that's what im doing currently. i work, eat, sleep, learn new things and currently i'm trying to get into some new hobbies / entertainment and just gain experience in different things life has to offer.

 

good luck.

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Originally posted by Seldoon@Apr 1 2005, 06:06 PM

Drinking and smoking, and the addictions that come from them, are often signs of poor/unhealthy self-esteem.

 

 

hmm, really? I never heard that before, I always thought that some people were just more likely to become addicted to things, just because of the chemical whatever-the-fuck going on in their brain.

 

edit: cuz, having problems like alcoholism and addiction are more likely if your parents or other family members have the same problems, right? that doesnt mean everyone in your family has low self esteem, its passed down genetically. ugh, maybe? right? i really dont know.

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whoa.. didn't even get through the first paragraph and i sprinted to the Lou with the worst case of the beer runs..

 

PS. I found somebodies can of Budweiser energy drink from a few nights ago and this shit is worst than eating a cigarette sandwich.

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I beat the bottle,it was HARD but soooooo worth it.If something is having a negative effect on your life then stop it.If drinking is fucking with your lady and your relations with everyone around you while you drink then cut it out homie.

 

I went straight edge after 3 years of real hard drug/alcohol abuse,I did this because I was losing my life to myself.I can't belive the way I've acted while wasted,the shit I've said to people the things I did to the world are retarded.

 

I'm not saying go straight edge,because at times I wish I never called myself that because of the stigmas that are assoicated with the label,I lost alot of so called friends from doing so.People think your trying to be better then they are and will take your actions to clean up as an insult and hate on you,but if they do they're not your friends man!

 

Your welcome to roll up here any time to bench and hang out with out the bottle,it took me years a to find people that aren't raging asshole drunks to hang out with after I quit.

 

 

I'll sponsor your aa nigguh

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one day at time homie..you have to live the rest of your life like that...

 

I actually have a buddy who is super cool when not drunk but turns into the biggest asshole every.It's funny cuase he can't fight worth a shit.I have seen him take more beatings then i can remember.Shit i have even got into it with him a couple of times.It sucks since he has the drinking gene.His brother,father and him all drink a shit load.Hopefully he doesn't kill himself with all his drinking..

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I cant say that i can relate to u on the being sober thing, not being a drinker myself, and not to sound like someone's mom, but i think u can do it.

 

If you keep being a drunken asshole all the time you'll one day end up with no one... I know because i've got a family full of nothing but drunks and shit's fucked up..

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im having to quit for the same reason as you my friend. my girlfriend and i get into fights when i drink. i cant smoke pot because i feel gross when i do now after being off of it for 7months thanx to the court. drinking was a way to get folded with out smoking. and pills and coke never were any real "cool" thing to me, so fuck thoes things. i realized not to long ago that i get REALLY depressed when im clean. i have tried to kill myself, and i have done some other fucked up shit to my self, but i got help. rehab was the right choice for me. im not saying its good for everybody tho. it just opend my eyes to things. good luck to you Dirty habit. i wish you the best of luck, because i know how hard it is. just dont end up losing your girlfriend, or your family. its all your really got when you take everything else away. my 2cents. peace

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Dirty Habit, hang in there homes. I know exactally how it is. I have been trying to limit my drinking. Once it became a 5 time a week thing, and I realized that mylife really only involves getting drunk, it was time to make a change. I am have trying to grab a water for every drink I used to drink. Its hard man, but cutting down on drinking is really starting to make me feel healthier and happier..

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