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BANK ROBBERY: *MUST READ*

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by Daze One Million, Feb 12, 2004.

  1. Daze One Million

    Daze One Million Elite Member

    Joined: Jun 12, 2001 Messages: 3,804 Likes Received: 0
    Excerpted from an article which appeared in the Dublin Times about a bank robbery on March 2.

    -----

    Once inside the bank shortly after midnight, their efforts at
    disabling the security system got underway immediately.

    The robbers, who expected to find one or two large safes filled with cash and
    valuables, were surprised to see hundreds of smaller safes scattered
    throughout the bank. The robbers cracked the first safe's combination,
    and inside they found only a bowl of vanilla pudding.

    As recorded on the bank's audiotape system, one robber said, "At least we'll have a bit to eat." The robbers opened up a second safe, and it also contained
    nothing but vanilla pudding. The process continued until all the
    safes were opened. They found not one pound sterling, a diamond,
    or an ounce of gold. Instead, all the safes contained covered bowls of pudding.
    >
    Disappointed, the robbers made a quiet exit, each leaving with
    nothing more than a queasy, uncomfortably full stomach.
    >
    The newspaper headline read:
    >

    IRELAND'S LARGEST SPERM BANK ROBBED EARLY THIS MORNING
     
  2. Abracadabra

    Abracadabra Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Dec 28, 2001 Messages: 22,906 Likes Received: 113
  3. Telo

    Telo Elite Member

    Joined: Jun 3, 2003 Messages: 4,162 Likes Received: 37
    funny but not new thread worthy.
     
  4. Crimsøn

    Crimsøn Senior Member

    Joined: Dec 18, 2003 Messages: 2,120 Likes Received: 1
    Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?

    You gotta be kiddin me.
     
  5. EyeforAnEYE

    EyeforAnEYE Elite Member

    Joined: Sep 29, 2003 Messages: 4,199 Likes Received: 3
  6. BIGBLUE

    BIGBLUE Senior Member

    Joined: Jul 4, 2003 Messages: 1,667 Likes Received: 0
  7. Daze One Million

    Daze One Million Elite Member

    Joined: Jun 12, 2001 Messages: 3,804 Likes Received: 0
    not a new post worthy statement
     
  8. Daze One Million

    Daze One Million Elite Member

    Joined: Jun 12, 2001 Messages: 3,804 Likes Received: 0
    somewhat related


    A robber burst into the downtown sperm bank, waving a shotgun around and balling orders out he told the girl behind the desk to get a sample. She obliged and the robber ordered her to drink the contents of the jar.

    She gulped down the sample and hardly flinched to which the robber removed his mask and revealed himself as the girls new boyfriend. "See it doesnt taste that bad does it".
     
  9. metallix

    metallix Elite Member

    Joined: Oct 7, 2001 Messages: 2,955 Likes Received: 1
    sperm is kept in freezers
     
  10. mr.yuck

    mr.yuck Veteran Member

    Joined: May 12, 2000 Messages: 6,952 Likes Received: 6
    Yo. that is straight fuck man.
     
  11. Mr. Whoppie

    Mr. Whoppie New Jack

    Joined: Mar 16, 2003 Messages: 0 Likes Received: 0
  12. wiseguy

    wiseguy Elite Member

    Joined: Mar 1, 2002 Messages: 2,543 Likes Received: 1
    they probably dont keep it in bowls either.
     
  13. Smart

    Smart Dirty Dozen Crew

    Joined: Apr 14, 2000 Messages: 17,017 Likes Received: 174
    ehh... about as funny as the woman who last night got over 8,000 text messages that said 'vote'... apparently there was some American Idol mix-up...
     
  14. Daze One Million

    Daze One Million Elite Member

    Joined: Jun 12, 2001 Messages: 3,804 Likes Received: 0
    ^is that true? hahaha that shit woulda bugged me the fuck out
     
  15. adderall

    adderall Elite Member

    Joined: Jun 10, 2003 Messages: 2,921 Likes Received: 1
    :sick: :sick: :sick:
     
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