Guest BROWNer Posted November 22, 2001 Share Posted November 22, 2001 alright, if you're like me, you like really crappy jokes that just completely suck and fall flat on their face.... if you have any, post 'em up please....or whats really fun is make some up on the spot... here's one i made up when i was 4 years old. its one of only a handful that have stayed with me my whole life................... knock knock... who's there? baldy... baldy who? baldy has no hair. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~i~hear~voices~ Posted November 22, 2001 Share Posted November 22, 2001 :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest imported_Tesseract Posted November 22, 2001 Share Posted November 22, 2001 Here's one i said to a girl on the bus 6 years ago(i changed locations to make it understandable) She:Where do you live? Me: philadelhia She: you mean philadelphia right? Me: no, philadelhia she: where is that? Me:next to philadelphia oh god...these glowing moments Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YourWelcome Posted November 22, 2001 Share Posted November 22, 2001 hahhaha... this track had me laughing my ass off, its soo horrible... "Ya Teef Iz Yellow" - Canibus Now thats one geezawful hilariouse joke... Ya teef is yellow like pinaple punch :lol: Happy thanksgiving to all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BROWNer Posted November 22, 2001 Share Posted November 22, 2001 haha...i like that one tesseract.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest imported_Tesseract Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 *the worst ever -Go to hell!!!, Hey, where the fuck you think youre going muthafucka! come back here -Fuck you! -NO, fuck you, ya hear FUCK YOU!!! What the fuck are you doin now? huh? quit fuckin around Get outta here before i break your neck!!! ...Leaving again pussy? huh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BROWNer Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 hahaaaa....what the fuck.....thats..awesome........... ...i don't get it at all.................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest imported_Tesseract Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 I wouldnt get it if i didnt made it;) It needs to be spoken to be understood since it requires gesticulation. Its a game on the imperative character of yelling at someone and the assumption that he literally executes what he's told. ex. -'GO to hell! [the person starts walking(going to hell)] ------'Hey, where the fuck you think youre going muthafucka! come back here!' ....still not funny. *I was getting real drunk this summer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BROWNer Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 ah.... i'm still in awe of your 'philadelhia' joke..... haha... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smart Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 that one about an impatient cow has been dogging me for 3 weeks, I hate that joke, and nobodoy ever tells it directly to me, just to people I'm with so I have to suffer through it time and again... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BROWNer Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 another awful one...with an awkward punchline, but hey... here goes: there's this guy who's out for a jog and he decides to hit the back country roads...after some time he gets pretty darn sweaty and out of breath, not to mention thirsty... so he sees what looks like a bar up ahead and heads for it....gets there, walks in out of breath, sits down at the bar and says to whomever is listening, 'i'm so thirsty i could lick a cows balls'.... the whole room moos.... yea....pretty bad..another childhood favourite that was unbelievably funny.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boogie hands Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 soo..... two guys walk into a bar, the third guy ducks.... thank you, thank you, ill be here all week.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pukey1 Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 a guy walks into a bar OUCH! :crazy: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest TEARZ Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 for some reason i thought this was the funniest joke when i was 8.... what did spock find in the toilet of the starship enterprise? the captain's log... HAHAHAHAHA i'm actually laughing right now thinking about it.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest imported_El Mamerro Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 What's feathery, wears rubber, and sits at the bottom of the ocean? A scuba diving chicken. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eyeBddub Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 What do abused familes have in common? -They don't fucken listen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eros Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 "knock knock" "who's there?" "Dwayne" "Dwayne who?" "Dwayne the bathtub momma, I am dwowning" "knock knock" "who's there?" "Phillip" "phillip who?" "Phillip the bathtub mommy I am dirty (pronounced doi-tee)" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PISS ONE Posted November 23, 2001 Share Posted November 23, 2001 how did the (insert race/gender/hair color here) die racking the leaves? they fell out of the tree why did the man fall off his bike? he had no legs why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw a fridge at him whats big, white and sits in a tree? a fridge in a tree how did the fridge kill the man with no legs riding a bike? it fell out of the tree while racking the leaves Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eros Posted November 24, 2001 Share Posted November 24, 2001 bump for my joke... little kid's jokes are the best Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Handjob Posted November 24, 2001 Share Posted November 24, 2001 http://www.mulletjoe.com/6.jpg'> I'm gonna kill you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pacman Posted November 24, 2001 Share Posted November 24, 2001 this joke goes without laughing...except mine usually I made it up... What do pornstars and nuns have in common? NUTTIN'! hahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BROWNer Posted November 24, 2001 Share Posted November 24, 2001 Re: this joke goes without laughing...except mine usually haha... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kr430n5_666 Posted November 24, 2001 Share Posted November 24, 2001 http://www.netgoth.org.uk/people/6378.jpg'> "I'm gonna kill you." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tue skinny Posted November 24, 2001 Share Posted November 24, 2001 here is an awfuk joke. why were you running? becuae he was getting chased . HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAAHAHAHAH HA -------------------------------------------------- IM SKINNY TUE SKINNY Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smart Posted November 24, 2001 Share Posted November 24, 2001 Originally posted by TEARZ for some reason i thought this was the funniest joke when i was 8.... what did spock find in the toilet of the starship enterprise? the captain's log... HAHAHAHAHA i'm actually laughing right now thinking about it.... What do the Starship Enterprize and Charmin toilet paper have in common? they both circle Uranus looking for Klingons...:crazy: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest TEARZ Posted November 24, 2001 Share Posted November 24, 2001 hahaha, keep em awful kids, keep em awwwwfullll! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Santa Claus Posted November 24, 2001 Share Posted November 24, 2001 butchered quote from gummo: "i was walking around and i see a guy laying in the road, i ask him if he needs any help, and he says 'no thanks, i just found this parking space and i sent my wife to find a car.' when i sit down to eat im feeling sexy, when i go to bed im feeling hungry, i cant take it! i ran into a bum the other day who said 'i havent eaten in weeks', i say, 'dont worry, it tastes the same'. ha cha cha, ha cha cha cha cha." eh, i wish i knew the direct quote, that scene is full of jokes i dont get. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tue skinny Posted November 25, 2001 Share Posted November 25, 2001 why does my friend have 3 legs. cuz he just does. hahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahah -------------------v-v- ---------------- - - - - - im tha king of awful jokes tue skiny to be funny i guess Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaesthebluntedwonder Posted November 25, 2001 Share Posted November 25, 2001 a dood and his wife are walking on the beach when they stumble upon an old bottle...one of them picks it up and rubs it and out of it comes a genie...the genie is like, you each get 3 wishes, but whatever the wife asks for the dood gets twice as much...so the wife asks for a rolls royce, the dood gets 2, she asks for a summer home, the dood gets two...on her final wish she asks to be beaten half to death Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fr8orade.homestead.com Posted November 25, 2001 Share Posted November 25, 2001 Originally posted by Santa Claus butchered quote from gummo: "i was walking around and i see a guy laying in the road, i ask him if he needs any help, and he says 'no thanks, i just found this parking space and i sent my wife to find a car.' when i sit down to eat im feeling sexy, when i go to bed im feeling hungry, i cant take it! i ran into a bum the other day who said 'i havent eaten in weeks', i say, 'dont worry, it tastes the same'. ha cha cha, ha cha cha cha cha." eh, i wish i knew the direct quote, that scene is full of jokes i dont get. Oh, shit. That scene makes me pee my pants. :cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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