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Apology to Americans (for Kilo)

Discussion in 'Channel Zero' started by casekonly, Nov 20, 2003.

  1. casekonly

    casekonly Veteran Member

    Joined: Aug 6, 2002 Messages: 8,264 Likes Received: 5
    i came across this and a website for the peaceful takeover of america by canada...i wish i could find that link...dammit..




    Apology to Americans
    The same Canadian Apology as featured on This Hour Has 22 Minutes early in 2003. You can view the Apology to Americans here.


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    On behalf of Canadians everywhere, I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry.

    I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron, but it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all, it's not like you actually elected him.

    I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own. It would be like if, well, say you have 10 times the television audience we did and you flood our market with great shows, cheaper than we could produce. I know you would never do that.

    I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defense I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours. As a way of our apology, please accept all of our Canadian NHL teams, which one by one are going out of business and moving to your fine country.

    I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you want to have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different: Everyone knew he had weapons.

    I'm sorry we burnt down your White-House during the war of 1812. I see you've rebuilt it! It's very nice.

    I'm sorry for Alen Thick, Shania Twain, Celen Dion, Lover Boy, the song from Sherif that ends with the high pitched end note, your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer, but we feel your pain.

    And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way, which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this, because, we've seen what you do to countries with whom you get upset with. For 22 Minutes, I'm Anthony St.Joseph, I'm Canadian. And I'm sorry.
     
  2. ubejinxed

    ubejinxed Veteran Member

    Joined: Apr 12, 2001 Messages: 7,543 Likes Received: 3
  3. fatbastard

    fatbastard Elite Member

    Joined: Jun 30, 2002 Messages: 2,879 Likes Received: 9
    canada is to america what newzealand is to australia.....anyone care to fill in the blanks?
     
  4. casekonly

    casekonly Veteran Member

    Joined: Aug 6, 2002 Messages: 8,264 Likes Received: 5
    NZ wasn't a prison colony
     
  5. casekonly

    casekonly Veteran Member

    Joined: Aug 6, 2002 Messages: 8,264 Likes Received: 5
  6. Jackson

    Jackson Veteran Member

    Joined: May 21, 2002 Messages: 7,345 Likes Received: 122
    American Budweiser is the worst.
     
  7. swiss cheese

    swiss cheese Senior Member

    Joined: Sep 4, 2002 Messages: 1,262 Likes Received: 0
  8. toaztlove

    toaztlove New Jack

    Joined: Nov 5, 2003 Messages: 78 Likes Received: 0
    I've always thought Canada is more like what America should be like. American's like to run their mouths and be like 'DAMN! CANADA, ITS NO DIFFERENT THAN HERE UP THERE!', but Canada is gravy, straight up and down I love it up there, and if the Canadian's wont fight, I'll fight for the Canadians!
     
  9. S@T@N

    S@T@N Senior Member

    Joined: Sep 15, 2002 Messages: 1,998 Likes Received: 0
    Yeah that's the attitude that made them an economic titan and a world
    superpower right?


    ...Oh wait.
     
  10. toaztlove

    toaztlove New Jack

    Joined: Nov 5, 2003 Messages: 78 Likes Received: 0
    i'm of the opinion that if a nation is an economic titan and a world superpower they're just part of the problem
     
  11. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Veteran Member

    Joined: Jul 12, 2000 Messages: 6,979 Likes Received: 2
    AWESOME!!:lol:


    Did anyone see that episode of the Simpsons last weekend
    where they sang a the Canadian National Anthem? Oh that was good.
    And Bart says "Canada will solve all our problems".


    I suggest everyone in the states visit Canada at least once.
    It might just change you opinion of this barren, frozen tundra.
    (and the women are hot too!)
     
  12. swiss cheese

    swiss cheese Senior Member

    Joined: Sep 4, 2002 Messages: 1,262 Likes Received: 0
    I want to move there, actually.
     
  13. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Veteran Member

    Joined: Jul 12, 2000 Messages: 6,979 Likes Received: 2
    Free Health Care for ALL!!!!


    and now is an incredible time for the canadian government too.


    • Paul Martin is becoming the PrimeMinister and even Bono can to his party.
      Bono gave this moving speach about how much faith he has in Paul Martin.

      Toronto (the NYC of canada) has a new mayor with a very leftist agenda.

      Jack Layton (a serious leftist from toronto) was elected to head the New Democratic Party


    serious changes coming up quickly.
     
  14. oner

    oner Member

    Joined: Feb 8, 2002 Messages: 289 Likes Received: 0
    I would love to live there, but it's hard convincing my wife. I hear it's hard to get a job there if you're an American. Is that true?
     
  15. --zeSto--

    --zeSto-- Veteran Member

    Joined: Jul 12, 2000 Messages: 6,979 Likes Received: 2
    it all depends on what trade you're looking to get into.
    If you are a skilled 'technician' there's lots of jobs.
    here's a link www.mediacorp2.com

    better start looking before you guys get another draft going on.
     
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